Jerkalert Posted September 12, 2005 Posted September 12, 2005 The SO who told me that she loved and was my soul mate. Said that she couldn't wait to get old together, and all that other garbage dumps me without warning. After a year together and after I stuck around for all the drama she made, when it came time that I started to have a little stress, she just walked away. Did NC for month and she said she missed me, was crying and all the what not. But then two days later told me that she is not in love with me anymore. Obviously, she had some issues but never communicated them. In the end it was the "its me not you" line. WTF. So I figured she was confused. Tried to pursue and then get the I love you a couple of days later. But then two days later she says she doesn't love me. Nothing even transpired within those two days. Finally, I tell her that I love her and that I want to make things work. I asked her that we openly talk about the issues and try to find a resolution and try to make it work. I figure if she doesnt want to work it out then we should complete NC forever. She didn't even need to think about it. Through all the great things that happened in the relationship, she didn't hesitate a second to say goodbye to me. LOL. What a freakin &unt. The emotional investment that we made had no value to her to try and work it out. I feel so betrayed and heartbroken. But you know what, if she can walk that easily, then I know that she is not worth the trouble. Thats how little she valued the relationship.
Candy Cane Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 Just be cool. If she loves you, great. If she doesn't, that's okay too. Tell her that no matter what she feeling that you will always care for her and will always be there for her. But tell her that you don't want to be in a relationship with her if she doesn't feel ready. Tell her you're cool just being her friend. Why? Love is all about the ability to accept some crap and to care about someone no matter what. That doesn't mean you have to be her doormat. Like I said, don't get back together with her until she is completely ready to commit to the relationship. I think it will all work out fine if you just chill a little bit and not take it all so personally. She will be impressed with the fact that you are taking things so well and you will really start to look attractive to her. Trust me. Good luck!
Jerkalert Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 Thanks for ur input. However, I am not counting on her wanting to come back. She only initiated contact after the break up to return things to me. She actually told me to not call or see her, but email was ok. WTF. During our relationship, she called me freakin 24/7. Always wanting to see me and talk to me. Then she had friends who she didnt like hanging around. Now she dont want to talk to me and she has all these plans to go out with her so called friends she said that she dont like. Just like week she told me she was at some person's house all day, and she told me that person backstabbed her at her company she worked for. I dont get it and I dont want to know whats going on. Sounds fishy to me. Let me ask you this. You think that she is doing NC to me. HAHA. That would be ironic
Art_Critic Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 What kind of drama did she have and what kind of stress do you have now ? She sounds selfish as sone as she was asked to give she couldn't.
Jerkalert Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 The drama she had was with her work and all. They were riding her to do so much. She wasnt sleeping much. So she started to kind of lose it. Then she was trying to change jobs. Started to feel that her career was not rewarding and her experiences in life were lacking. Scared that work was taking time from doing what she wanted. No balance in her life. As for me, I was taking care of mother who was ill and couldnt work. So I helped around and paid her bills. I had monetary responsibilities outside of my own personal life. My job began to get busy and I had to work alot. I was not eating and sleeping properly so the health deteriorated. Too many other responsibilities to juggle and I became less attentive to details in every area. I couldnt make plans because of uncertainties beyond my control. Also, I did not have transportation because I sold it and wanted to save money for a new one. That is what I am saying. I would assume that she could see what was going on.
JayKay Posted September 14, 2005 Posted September 14, 2005 This woman does not sound mature enough for a real relationship. Be careful of people who thrive on drama; they just seem to always need complicated 'problems' and love to say they are 'confused'. They hate to make choices and they hate to compromise. Drama Addicts also are very poor at taking care of others. They tend to need need need.....but then when YOU need they are irritated at the inconvenience. I'd give this one a wide berth and start taking care of yourself. I'm guessing this woman is either * Very young or * Very emotionally underdeveloped
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