heyitsme818 Posted November 14, 2018 Posted November 14, 2018 So I need some advice. I’ve had a few horrible and I mean horrible relationships. I went out with this guy that I met via a friend the other night. We have so much in common. We’ve been texting, and decided we should go out just the two of us, as we’ve done group things. He asked me if something would be a problem as time went on. I told him no. We text day in and day out. We went on our first date and I think it went well, but he didn’t say what he thought and if he wanted to continue. Meanwhile my friend’s are all asking if I’m now in a relationship, but I don’t know and I’m afraid to ask him how he felt. I have so many insecurities when it comes to dating right now, I don’t know what to think. And I certainly don’t want to be in the friend zone. Any advice? Should I ask if he wants us to be official? He’s had some bad relationships too. What now? All I thought I knew about dating isn’t what I had thought because of previous nightmares I dealt with.
MidwestUSA Posted November 14, 2018 Posted November 14, 2018 You've been on ONE date! Stop thinking! What was the 'something' that might be a problem as time went on? That's really unclear. Either one of you asks the other out for a second date, or you don't. There's nothing wrong with you asking him out. If you like him, feel free to do so. If you're the type who thinks the man should do all the asking, just wait. In time, you'll know if he's interested. As for your nosy friends, tell them you went on a date. A date. One date. A single date. 3
Author heyitsme818 Posted November 14, 2018 Author Posted November 14, 2018 And him not was the something
MidwestUSA Posted November 14, 2018 Posted November 14, 2018 And him not was the something You're religious, he's not? If I'm understanding correctly. Don't worry about it right now. You told him no problem. Just get to a second date. Problems like differences regarding religion, finances and children will have time to rear their ugly heads later. Get to know each other first. Put the horse before the cart, or however that saying goes.
d0nnivain Posted November 14, 2018 Posted November 14, 2018 It was one date. If he doesn't scheduled a 2nd date soon, then you know he's not interested in pursuing anything When your friends ask pushy Qs, like are you in a relationship now, remind them it was 1 date & too soon to think about such things but do say you would be open to a 2nd date, if that is true. You don't want it to get back to him that you aren't interested. If you are brave enough you can ask him for a 2nd date.
kendahke Posted November 15, 2018 Posted November 15, 2018 So I need some advice. I’ve had a few horrible and I mean horrible relationships. I went out with this guy that I met via a friend the other night. We have so much in common. We’ve been texting, and decided we should go out just the two of us, as we’ve done group things. He asked me if something would be a problem as time went on. I told him no. We text day in and day out. We went on our first date and I think it went well, but he didn’t say what he thought and if he wanted to continue. Meanwhile my friend’s are all asking if I’m now in a relationship, but I don’t know and I’m afraid to ask him how he felt. I have so many insecurities when it comes to dating right now, I don’t know what to think. And I certainly don’t want to be in the friend zone. Any advice? Should I ask if he wants us to be official? He’s had some bad relationships too. What now? All I thought I knew about dating isn’t what I had thought because of previous nightmares I dealt with. Your friends need to back off. There is no possible way you could be in a relationship with someone you've only seen once. That's ludicrous of them to even put that forward. Unless you're going to pick up a phone and make the second date's plans, you're going to have to wait for him to come back around. He may be dating other women that he doesn't have to tell you about right now because he's not asking for exclusivity from you at this point. Are you sure your judgment is honed enough for you to be in a new relationship? Seeing that you've mentioned your bad relationships in the past--what work on yourself have you done since the demise of your last relationship to make you emotionally ready and whole for a new relationship?
smackie9 Posted November 15, 2018 Posted November 15, 2018 I have been on the other end, I dated religious, and it doesn't work, I would never do it again. 2
lurker74 Posted November 16, 2018 Posted November 16, 2018 I have been on the other end, I dated religious, and it doesn't work, I would never do it again. I tend to agree. If religion is very important to one side and not the other, there are simply too many incompatibilities. Dated a woman earlier this year that told me she's religious but doesn't care if her partner is. Found out on the date that she has a no-sex-before-marriage rule. Well, I have a no-marriage-before-sex rule so there was nowhere to go.
PRW Posted November 16, 2018 Posted November 16, 2018 So I need some advice. I’ve had a few horrible and I mean horrible relationships. I went out with this guy that I met via a friend the other night. We have so much in common. We’ve been texting... We text day in and day out. Stop the teenager texting and be adults. Save it for the date. Whatever it is you are texting about,...save it for the date. If he freaks out because of that then you know you found a bad one and you need to get away. By the same token if you freak out because of this, then he needs to drop you. I have so many insecurities when it comes to dating right now, I don’t know what to think.Exactly Should I ask if he wants us to be official?Are you crazy? No! Give it about 7-8 weeks and see what you think then. Yes, you should be the one to bring up the conversation,...not him. He’s had some bad relationships too. And so has everyone else. What else is new. For all you know,...he is the one that made them "bad". 1
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