Is this Guy Playing Me???

[confusedblubber]

There's this guy who I met in college and we have to do a huge project together and I thought he liked me but now I am very unsure and think he's just a player. It really sucks cuz I have fallen for him big time and now I feel miserable. For example the first night we met at some café to work on our project and he offered me his jacket, he drove me to my car, and even invited me back to his house to "continue working on the project" even though we got a lot done and it was almost 9:00 pm.

 

Then the next two times we got together we went to his house and he was extremely flirty, complimenting my outfit over and over. He said I had a pretty smile and then proceeded to ask me if my lips were soft and I said "yeah I guess" and I asked him if his were soft and he said "wanna find out" and I blushed and just rolled my eyes and asked if said that to all the girls and he said "yeah cuz there's so many girls here. is that what you think of me?" but I just laughed it off. he was drinking that night and never once forced me to drink with him. he showed me around his house, he introduced me to his friends, and then we went out to grab something to eat.

 

we went back to his place and sat on his couch and he sat really close to me and tickled me and made kissy faces at me. when I left he gave me a hug and told me to text him when I got home. the second time I went over there, there was way more flirting. I ended up cuddling with him, he rubbed my thighs and legs all over and I scratched his back and played with his hair while he laid on my lap. I stayed there until 12 am and he kept calling me a sweetheart. He gave me a big hug when I left and that was it.

 

the thing that makes me confused is he literally doesn't text me about anything else other than the project. theres only been one instance where he texted me first about something random. in class, I avoid eye contact and sometimes just leave without talking to him when class is over. he used to hang around and wait for me. then today in class we worked on the project and he seemed so upset and barely talked to me.

 

he didn't ask me how my weekend went or literally didn't talk to me at all even though I just texted him on Friday. he just seemed tired and totally acting different. im so upset because how can you go touching someone intimately like that and try kissing them and then barely talk to them in class. I hate this, because now I am feeling self conscious.

Edited November 7, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[salparadise]

in class, I avoid eye contact and sometimes just leave without talking to him when class is over.

 

 

^ there is your answer. You love him showering you with attention, but you aren't reciprocating and it feels like rejection. You need to be half of this equation if you like him and want to keep the good energy flowing. Why do some women not get this?

[RecentChange]

Yep, sounds like he showered you with attention and compliments, and you were lukewarm in your response.

 

You sounded like you tolerated his company rather than being excited about it.

 

You wouldn’t even make eye contact in class!

 

So he gave up.

 

Here is my advice, if you like someone, let them know!!! People aren’t mind readers, especially when you are giving conflicting physical signals.

 

Instead of just taking his compliments, you should have let him know you really enjoy the way he makes you feel. That you enjoy spending time with him. That you wanted to get to know him better. That you like getting texts from him and hoped to get more.

 

You know you could have texted him to ask about his day or anything else besides the project. Why didn’t you? He already did the hard part in making it clear he was interested in you. Honestly you had nothing to lose by reaching out to him, and everything to gain.

[d0nnivain]

I get a player vibe, or at least that he's more worldly then you are. When you backed off & acted all shy, he chose not to pursue because he thinks you are avoiding him on purpose because you don't like him. For heaven's sake if you didn't recognize that "are your lips soft" drivel as plea for a kiss, you need to wake up.

 

That said you have a project to do together. Right now you can't afford messy emotional entanglements that could possibly derail your grade. If you still like him, finish the project then when you get your grade give him a big kiss to celebrate.

[smackie9]

he's hitting two birds with one stone....get a project done, and get some tail as a bonus.

[RedHead5]

I get a player vibe, or at least that he's more worldly then you are. When you backed off & acted all shy, he chose not to pursue because he thinks you are avoiding him on purpose because you don't like him. For heaven's sake if you didn't recognize that "are your lips soft" drivel as plea for a kiss, you need to wake up.

 

That said you have a project to do together. Right now you can't afford messy emotional entanglements that could possibly derail your grade. If you still like him, finish the project then when you get your grade give him a big kiss to celebrate.

 

I got the player vibe too. Someone telling you how hot you are all the time is not an indication of any emotion. When you are together, sounds like he is laying it on thick and trying to create physical contact as much as possible. Sounds like he is more interested in your body than your mind. Be careful.

[CollinW]

I got the player vibe too. Someone telling you how hot you are all the time is not an indication of any emotion. When you are together, sounds like he is laying it on thick and trying to create physical contact as much as possible. Sounds like he is more interested in your body than your mind. Be careful.

They're college students. This is how they act. You expect him to act like he's trying to build a life with her? I don't get women who refuse to engage with men who they like then play stupid when the man gives up.