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Posted

I was catching up with this girl and I had asked her about her dating situation and if she had any good sex recently and that that situation was and she said something that sounded sweet but I’m not sure if it means she’s still interested she responded “yea I mean the guys were good, they were alright. They weren’t you though.” I said “well thank you, I’m flattered” and she said “Yea but it’s more than that, we had a connection. We were really close. It was just different” and I agreed and said “we were really close”

 

But I couldn’t tell if that was her way of saying she wants to be close again or if she was just talking in the past tense. Any help?

Posted

Women like when a man they've fancied, even in the past, and are still cordial with, desires them. It's a ego and libido boost. That doesn't mean she wants to have sex with you or get back with you, rather remembers the 'connection' and likes the image of it in the flesh to make her feel good about herself. That presumes your relationship ran its course and you/she ended it.

 

Such encounters can be a fun time for flirting though. Doesn't have to go anywhere, just adult banter. If it does, enjoy.

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Posted
Women like when a man they've fancied, even in the past, and are still cordial with, desires them. It's a ego and libido boost. That doesn't mean she wants to have sex with you or get back with you, rather remembers the 'connection' and likes the image of it in the flesh to make her feel good about herself. That presumes your relationship ran its course and you/she ended it.

 

Such encounters can be a fun time for flirting though. Doesn't have to go anywhere, just adult banter. If it does, enjoy.

Thanks, well we were flirting a lot. I was teasing her and she was laughing and touching my arm. I told her when she moves back to contact me and she said she might visit before then so I told her to hit me up when she visits too and we’ll get together. As we were parting I also said to stay in touch and she said “yea you too”

Posted

Sounds like some fond reminiscing.

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Posted
Sounds like some fond reminiscing.

But nothing more?

Posted

If she wanted you, she'd be with you...End of story..

 

It all just sounds like a modified version of the "its not you, its me" bull crap..

 

just move on, man. .

 

TFY

Posted
But nothing more?

 

Was there anything you left out? Did she kiss you or suggest having another try?

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Posted
If she wanted you, she'd be with you...End of story..

 

It all just sounds like a modified version of the "its not you, its me" bull crap..

 

just move on, man. .

 

TFY

I don’t see how it is anything like “it’s not you, it’s me” crap

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Posted
Was there anything you left out? Did she kiss you or suggest having another try?

Well we were going to hook up when she was in town, just for sex but a bunch of bad luck on her end and my end prevented it so I told her “well come say hi anyway and let’s talk” there was no kiss though. There was a moment where we locked eyes and just smiled and stared at eachother but I really care about this girl and didn’t want to ruin anything and wasn’t sure if she wants me for more than just a quick sex session while she was in town

Posted
I don’t see how it is anything like “it’s not you, it’s me” crap

 

Sure it is...

 

She's patting you on the head, by telling you that "you're special"...What did you expect her to say?? That you have the smallest dick out of all of them??

 

First of all, why would you even ask a woman a question like that? I am assuming she rejected/dumped you? And what kind of a moron is she that she would even answer you....:rolleyes:

 

I'll say it again...There is nothing to read into....All you are doing is feeding her ego...You want to keep at that, then go for it...

 

 

TFY

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Posted
Sure it is...

 

She's patting you on the head, by telling you that "you're special"...What did you expect her to say?? That you have the smallest dick out of all of them??

 

First of all, why would you even ask a woman a question like that? I am assuming she rejected/dumped you? And what kind of a moron is she that she would even answer you....:rolleyes:

 

I'll say it again...There is nothing to read into....All you are doing is feeding her ego...You want to keep at that, then go for it...

 

 

TFY

Well we were going to hook up when she was in town, just for sex but a bunch of bad luck on her end and my end prevented it so I told her “well come say hi anyway and let’s talk” there was no kiss though. There was a moment where we locked eyes and just smiled and stared at eachother but I really care about this girl and didn’t want to ruin anything and wasn’t sure if she wants me for more than just a quick sex session while she was in town

Posted

Have you talked about having another go with her?

Posted
Well we were going to hook up when she was in town, just for sex but a bunch of bad luck on her end and my end prevented it so I told her “well come say hi anyway and let’s talk” there was no kiss though. There was a moment where we locked eyes and just smiled and stared at eachother but I really care about this girl and didn’t want to ruin anything and wasn’t sure if she wants me for more than just a quick sex session while she was in town

 

 

Fair enough …

 

Maybe I just don't understand the dynamics as you didn't really give any back story here.. I just assumed it was an ex gf that you were trying to reconnect with...If its just a casual sex thing, then my answers wouldn't apply...

 

Anyway, IME,(and I am probably much older than you) women will gladly keep old flames around...Especially insecure women..It makes them feel desired...They may want nothing more from you in a romantic or sexual sense, but will throw you little crumbs so you keep blowing wind up their behind...Sure sounds like that may be the case here, but I can't say for sure...

 

And if you really like her, and she actually did agree for just a "quick sex session" why would you even do that? At that point you are assuming the role of the typical woman that gets used by some guy that doesn't care enough about her to make her his girlfriend.. but will take her down when he feels like it..

 

I dunno, man...The signals don't look so good from here...but I wish you well..

 

TFY

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Posted
Have you talked about having another go with her?

No, we talked about what traits we wanted in a significant other and she told me since she’s been with me she’s dumped 5 guys bc she just wasn’t feeling it. She doesn’t drink much so I was teasing her and said “you need some booze in your life to loosen up” She knows I’m a big drinker so she laughed and said “well maybe when I move back you can show me how it’s done” does that count?

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Posted
Fair enough …

 

Maybe I just don't understand the dynamics as you didn't really give any back story here.. I just assumed it was an ex gf that you were trying to reconnect with...If its just a casual sex thing, then my answers wouldn't apply...

 

Anyway, IME,(and I am probably much older than you) women will gladly keep old flames around...Especially insecure women..It makes them feel desired...They may want nothing more from you in a romantic or sexual sense, but will throw you little crumbs so you keep blowing wind up their behind...Sure sounds like that may be the case here, but I can't say for sure...

 

And if you really like her, and she actually did agree for just a "quick sex session" why would you even do that? At that point you are assuming the role of the typical woman that gets used by some guy that doesn't care enough about her to make her his girlfriend.. but will take her down when he feels like it..

 

I dunno, man...The signals don't look so good from here...but I wish you well..

 

TFY

I can see your point to all the above. However, to address the whole why would I let her have a quick session and assume the role of the woman? Well she’s a nice girl, she isn’t some slut that sleeps around and I wanted to spend an entire day with her and give her 10 orgasms and give her an experience unlike any guy. I wanted to show her how much I missed her and love her and I know women get attached through sex so

Posted (edited)
I can see your point to all the above. However, to address the whole why would I let her have a quick session and assume the role of the woman? Well she’s a nice girl, she isn’t some slut that sleeps around and I wanted to spend an entire day with her and give her 10 orgasms and give her an experience unlike any guy. I wanted to show her how much I missed her and love her and I know women get attached through sex so

 

Ugh...

 

This approach won't "win a woman over" ...And if it actually did, you probably wouldn't want her at that point, anyway.....I mean, sure, women love sex, but they love the guy first...All the other aspects...The sex is just a bonus..

 

It doesn't sound like she feels the same way you do about her... In fact I guarantee it...

 

 

Ive said as much as I can...Ill let the others respond at this point...

 

 

TFY

Edited by thefooloftheyear
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Posted
Ugh...

 

This approach won't "win a woman over" ...And if it actually did, you probably wouldn't want her at that point, anyway.....I mean, sure, women love sex, but they love the guy first...All the other aspects...The sex is just a bonus..

 

It doesn't sound like she feels the same way you do about her... In fact I guarantee it...

 

 

Ive said as much as I can...Ill let the others respond at this point...

 

 

TFY

Hmm, she agreed to it and she said she was excited about it. But yea I can see what you’re saying. So I guess I shouldn’t reach out to her, I should wait to see what she does?

Posted

Right now you don't live near each other. You drink but she doesn't. Both of those things contribute to the idea that you are incompatible long term.

 

You said you had been planning to hook up but that didn't work out so you met just to talk. Since you had been planning to have sex, of course sex was a topic of conversation. In that context, she complimented you in the moment. You already knew she was DTF but I see no indication she has an interest in reconciliation or an LDR at this point. Her interest in you was far baser but that didn't work out. Perhaps if she does move back you can revisit the issue but for now, it's nothing.

Posted

Thanks for pointing that out Malin889. It's so easy for people to come online and pretend or give false identities.

 

Op, i wonder what your reason is for falsifying identity.

Posted
Thanks for pointing that out Malin889. It's so easy for people to come online and pretend or give false identities.

 

Op, i wonder what your reason is for falsifying identity.

 

It mainly sounds like he/she is trying to get advice from both sides of the coin. The last post she was a girl trying to hook up with a guy friend, now she’s a guy trying to hook up with a female friend. It’s confusing.

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Posted
It mainly sounds like he/she is trying to get advice from both sides of the coin. The last post she was a girl trying to hook up with a guy friend, now she’s a guy trying to hook up with a female friend. It’s confusing.

You’re right, I do apologize for deceiving people, I’m new to these forums. I don’t normlaly ask people online so I didn’t think of it as deceiving but just gathering info. Truth is I’m the guy in this scenario and my original post was to see how I came off to others and thereby how she might’ve perceived me. Then the second post I wanted to know if she was interested or if I was reading into things.

Posted

If you are a guy then maybe best to change your profile as it says you are female.

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