Snotty Posted November 5, 2018 Posted November 5, 2018 Im not sure if this is the right place for this or not... it is dating related. I have an issue with my sister in law and i dont know how to deal with her. Basically, when i am dating someone, she is mean and nasty to me. When i am not dating someone, she is sweet and kind. My sweetie and i were split up for a couple monts. During that time, my sister in law was nice to me. When my sweetie and i first started going out, she was horrible to me. The first time my sweetie and i went to my sister in laws house, she pulled out a scrap book and started showing my sweetie pics of my ex wife, pointing her out, and telling my sweetie her name. Before our split, i told my sweetie of my sister in laws behavior. My sweetie said she acts like that because she has a crush on me. I really didn’t believe her, but after we split, she was back to being nice to me. So... we are back together, and the holidays are approaching, and i do not want to deal with my sister in law. Talking to my brother will not help, as she dores this when no one is around. Everyone in the family know she is a B, but no one addresses the elephant in the room. I dont know what to do, and i dont want to start a scene at a family gathering.
Gaeta Posted November 5, 2018 Posted November 5, 2018 1. You ignore her and tell your gf to ignore her. 2. You tell your sister in law you would appreciate she doesn't bring up your exs when you visit. I have a sister in law from hell, we ignore her. We know if we speak to her about her attitude it's lost ahead of time and my brother is a pro at ignoring the elephant in the room so to save our xmas and our family gathering we just smile and ignore what she says. When she brings up pictures of your exs just change subject, turn around and start speaking to someone else.
Gaeta Posted November 5, 2018 Posted November 5, 2018 The first time my sweetie and i went to my sister in laws house, she pulled out a scrap book and started showing my sweetie pics of my ex wife, pointing her out, and telling my sweetie her name. You know that's not the end of the world right? You were married, it's your history, your new GF should get used to the idea you had an ex. Your family had a closer relationship with your ex during your marriage and she will be brought up once in a while. Saturday I was at a family dinner and my youngest brother told me how he remembered his very first trip to the movies was with with my and my ex-h and what movie we watched, etc. My BF was sitting next to me, he would never be offended because my family brings up my ex-h once in a while, after all we were 15 years together they're not about to forget him just cause I have a bf.
smackie9 Posted November 5, 2018 Posted November 5, 2018 Address her poor behavior when it happens but in a calm non threatening manner. Just pull her aside and talk to her privately. If she causes a scene that's on her not you.....just walk away.
d0nnivain Posted November 5, 2018 Posted November 5, 2018 Take it up with your brother. Basically whether she's hot or cold, I'd ignore her. I can't stand 2 faced people.
kendahke Posted November 6, 2018 Posted November 6, 2018 i dont want to start a scene at a family gathering. Here are your options if this is your goal: 1. don't take 'sweetie" around them 2. do go around your brother and SIL 3. Address the problem to her face right when she does this and call her out on it. Tell her that this craziness ends. If she has something to say, then spit it out. In the words of O-ren Ishii, "Now's the time". If not, this stupid little game she's playing ends now or you will stop coming around them for the holidays. Sometimes, you have to find your backbone in front of family. Your SIL is acting way inappropriately and your brother is a wuss who's afraid of his wife. There is no way she should be acting in any way BUT as a sister towards you and you need to snatch a knot in her behind.
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