Nubemeister Posted September 11, 2005 Posted September 11, 2005 For the last couple of days I have figured out that maybe I need some professional help. Im not sure though... Mainly because of two breakups I had with one person. It's been so long and I can't seem to feel the same towards them. I think about them and I believe I still love them. The excuse I got for breaking up with me was that I was feeling way too much. I don't know what that means. The things is I have never stopped and he's the only person I dated and loved. I don't know if I need someone else in order for me to forget that or if that's bad... Theres just too much of it that it hurts me when I think about it still..and no matter how hard I try to forget him, my mind always goes back to him. And all I can remember were the words that were spoken and now they mean nothing to him. They never did... Do I need too or do I just need to be in a room by myself and scream or yell... I need to let this go somehow...
betterwife Posted September 11, 2005 Posted September 11, 2005 It sounds like you have too much time on your hands! Let him go. I'm for sure he's not worrying about you because he is the that let you go. Leave him alone before you get hurt again.
heartnsoul Posted September 11, 2005 Posted September 11, 2005 Can you offer a little more background? How long were you with this person? How long ago did you break up?
Author Nubemeister Posted September 11, 2005 Author Posted September 11, 2005 I do leave him alone and I am busy with school and work, but he still is with me. I don't know if I am making sense...and it's been so long. So long that he has stayed with me...and I want to let it go...it's just...maybe I don't know how too?
Author Nubemeister Posted September 11, 2005 Author Posted September 11, 2005 We met in high school...we were both 18. We were together for about a year and then he decided to break up with me because he said he felt that he was not worthy enough for me when I tried to let him see he was all I wanted. He was awesome. Two years pass by or maybe more and I am 21 he's 21, I wonder how he is doing and we started to talk again. It hurt me the first time really badly because he was my first bf. Anyways, we start to talk again and everything just hit me again, we went out and we decided to give it a try now that we are on the same page. He tells me things like he has never felt the way he did with me about the others, I actually thought he cared... Then were talking one day and he breaks up with me because he said that I was feeling too much and that again he was not worthy enough.... And that just made me feel NOT worthy enough because I wanted to make it work. He was not a bad guy. He was what I wanted in a guy...but anyways. He has moved away for college and wrote that he never really showed any sadness when breaking up with someone or when his friends were injured. He just put on a face of sadness because it was expected...and that just brough me down even lower... I don't know why I still carry this feeling for him when I know he doesn't care. I don't know if its because I think I won't find someone else or if its because ...I don't know how to let things go? The second break up happened at the beginning of the year... I find it off and I don't know how to get the FEELING out...
heartnsoul Posted September 11, 2005 Posted September 11, 2005 Well, you loved him. It's understandible that you're feelings are hurt. It's OK to feel what you're feeling...there's no time limit on feelings of loss. Don't beat yourself up over that! However, if you feel that counseling will help you then by all means, do it. My thoughts regarding the ex: I think that you really internalized him leaving as a reflection of your self worth. Somehow, him telling you that 'you felt too much' may've been translated into 'something's wrong with me' I could be way off base but...that's the impression that I get. It's up to you now to realize that maybe he was the one with the issues and that it's not your fault. There are guys out there who WILL appreciate your attention/affection, he simply wasn't one of them. I would suggest that you put yourself out there....meet new people!! Dating could be a good way to build up your confidence!
Author Nubemeister Posted September 11, 2005 Author Posted September 11, 2005 You are right I believe.... Thank You...
Pzykotik Posted September 13, 2005 Posted September 13, 2005 Now I'm going to sound like an idiot... I know I was one and that's about it, anyway... I'd been with my girlfriend for 15 months, we were coming up to our 16 month aniversarty... anyway a few weeks ago she read a conversation I had saved between me and a girl on MsN, just some northern lass who I'd never met and didn't mean anything to me but still, it was a really dirty convo about a 'dream' I'd had about her... The story I told this girl was bollocks but that isn't the point. It really hurt my gf, understandably... But she knew it was AGES ago that I'd had this convo and that was it, we talked about how our relationship wasn't really working 'cause I was over protective and she told me she wanted our relationship to work 100% - then she went to a club with a load of guys she was friends with ages ago, I had a bit of a problem with it so we had a bit of an argument but I called her a little after to say sorry and that I was being over the top and she should go. So then we had a party on Friday, she was all weird at the beginning of the night and told me she thought our relationship was over... We had the good memories but that was it, then started crying... I gave her a cuddle and said everything would be alright and I'd always be here for her, now I don't know what to do. Am I to try and get back together with her in a few weeks, or should I cut my loses and move on... We lost our virginity together and I still love her to bits. What should I do!!!???
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