GoodDaze43 Posted October 26, 2018 Share Posted October 26, 2018 Last month I started talking to this girl on tinder she lives couple hours away but comes to my city sometimes for work. We exchanged a lot of texts and finally met up and went on date which was great. We exchange text almost everyday. She did go cold for a bit saying she has been crazy busy and than saying sorry her ex was trying to get back with her etc.. So I started to pull back. Recently she began to call me baby and hubby, and say she misses me and say she got a little jealous seeing me liking girls photos on social media. What I'm confused about is she never make time to hangout whenever I ask her.. Everytime I ask when can I take her out or see her, she always says she been so busy and will let me know when she figures her schedule out. She has still yet to give a date she is free. What is going on? What should I do? : Link to post Share on other sites
PRW Posted October 26, 2018 Share Posted October 26, 2018 That one is a little tough to figure out. She seems on one hand to just enjoy the attention but doesn't want more than that. Then you got her attention when you pulled back a bit. Daily texting is bad, you have to stop doing that. It is hard to do that once you started a bad habit, but you have to taper that off. That is also her "attention fix", so the more you text/call the less she will be inclined to make the effort to see you in person. Plan out a date ahead of time. Then offer her a date. I said offer, not ask. "Let's go to <blah blah>" instead of "Would you like to go to <blah blah>. It is important that you give an exact day/time/place. Then tell her if that doesn't work then "Maybe another time, or shoot me a counter offer". The words "Maybe another time" are important, women understand that to me "I am not going to ask you again". In sales that is called "The Takeaway". If she doesn't accept then you have to leave the ball in her court for the counter offer and be mentally prepared to forget about her if she doesn't respond. During this process you need to taper down all that texting, it is not helping you. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted October 26, 2018 Share Posted October 26, 2018 Tip: consistency is key. I'm getting a hot cold vibe from her...plus she is FB stalking you...you don't need that jealousy, checking up crap. So immature. You are prob thinking "aww that cute she's thinking of me". no it's not so cute, it's a red flag. You want someone that doesn't play games. Link to post Share on other sites
Grey40 Posted October 26, 2018 Share Posted October 26, 2018 When she said that her ex is trying to get back with her combined with “I’m busy” you should have just dropped her totally. She’s obviously not over that situation yet and not ready to date. She’s keeping you there as an option in case she becomes more available. Next time she reaches out, set a specific date and time to go out and ask her did she says she’s busy just say “No problem let me know when your schedule fees up” and never contact her again..let her come to you. If she’s really interested and afraid she’ll lose you, she’ll agree to a date. Right now you’re just wasting time. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
sabaton Posted October 26, 2018 Share Posted October 26, 2018 Last month I started talking to this girl on tinder she lives couple hours away but comes to my city sometimes for work. We exchanged a lot of texts and finally met up and went on date which was great. We exchange text almost everyday. She did go cold for a bit saying she has been crazy busy and than saying sorry her ex was trying to get back with her etc.. So I started to pull back. Recently she began to call me baby and hubby, and say she misses me and say she got a little jealous seeing me liking girls photos on social media. What I'm confused about is she never make time to hangout whenever I ask her.. Everytime I ask when can I take her out or see her, she always says she been so busy and will let me know when she figures her schedule out. She has still yet to give a date she is free. What is going on? What should I do? : Have you guys had sex? If she slept with you - she's attracted to you at the very least. Have you not had sex yet with her? Probably she just likes the attention you give her. Link to post Share on other sites
ChatroomHero Posted October 26, 2018 Share Posted October 26, 2018 If you get to the point you ask yourself if someone is just a text buddy, she's a text buddy. Link to post Share on other sites
Lotsgoingon Posted October 27, 2018 Share Posted October 27, 2018 She's not interested ... Sure, she liked some things about you ... but she's still tied to her ex. People do not bring up exes unless they are divorced and sharing and juggling child custody ... or because they are still interested in or involved with the ex. And no one is "busy" when it comes to making time for people they want to date or sleep with. Busy just means you aren't a priority. No harm ... great question. Link to post Share on other sites
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