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Posted

:sick: how unusual to be confused! Just typing this out, it helps my head. So I met this man two years ago. I was not long out of my marriage so not in a good place to start a relationship. He had just come out of something serious where he had been hurt, so he too not in a good place. We did see each other though as friends with benefits, but I got attached to him. We weren't on the same page, him being happy with fbw, me not being happy with feeling used. Fast forward two years. We have had this off and on again thing, the most recent 'distancing' was about 9 months. I thought he had moved on, as I was trying to do. So a couple of weeks ago, he reconnected through text. We've just been texting small talk. I'm thinking that :

 

 

he might have just come out of something so wants to reconnect because he's lonely and wants sex

 

 

he has actually been reflecting on how good we were together and wants to try again now he feels ready for a relationship

 

 

 

he only wants to be friends

 

 

Why haven't I asked him? We've only been texting and I don't want to have a deep and meaningful conversation over texting. I'm waiting for him to ask me out so we can talk face to face.

 

 

I know I should block and walk so don't tell me to do that :(

 

 

Any thoughts? Has anyone else been here and how did you resolve it? Maybe it worked out? Thanks

Posted

I think you will have to wait until you see him and have a proper conversation to assess what his motives are.

 

It could be any of the reasons you mentioned; it doesn't sound as though he has given enough information at this point to guess which reason is accurate. If he was happy with FWB before, and knows you weren't, I would see if he actually asks you out this time around and then try to feel him out.

Posted
...he might have just come out of something so wants to reconnect because he's lonely and wants sex

Winner winner, chicken dinner.

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Posted

If they weren't that into you the first time around, they're not going to change now.

 

 

 

He's trying his damnedest to rope you in for some more sex...that is the only thing on his mind and the only thing he wants.

  • Like 2
Posted

I would probably be really curious and have to see it out and keep responding to his texts.

 

But I wouldn't initiate any texts or other contact and I would most definitely keep my expectations low. Until he shows you otherwise I would assume he's just not seeing anyone right now and is seeing if you'll pick up where you left off.

 

But if you feel at risk of being really hurt then just ignore him. Don't open yourself up for more than you can handle. Again, for now assume he's not offering any more than he ever has.

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