helloladies21 Posted October 23, 2018 Posted October 23, 2018 I was with my recent ex for 2 months at the beginning of the year. We split for unknown reasons and I kept out of touch. As I was starting to feel better after 3 months of NC, she came back and I gave it another try. This ended after a month in July when I broke it off with her. Even though I am the dumper, I feel like the dumpee. She essentially forced me to break up with her by putting up walls and ignoring me and emotionally distancing herself from me. I tried talking to her about it, but she was too closed off. I came to the conclusion that she is not over her divorce and may have some other emotional/mental issues. I am not perfect, but I do not take any blame for our split and have no regret in breaking up with her. I could not function with her acting like that. I've been through my share of breakups in my 40 years on this earth. I know how the process goes. After a certain amount of time, I will simply get over her. Waiting for this to happen is still difficult though. I'm doing everything I can think of to help the process along. Stay in NC, exercise, go out, date. I can't think of anything else to do. But my mind is consumed by her. I've dated a lot in my life and have never felt a connection like that. I was with my ex wife for 10 years and this blew that away. Even though mentally I know there's no chance we could ever work or will ever get back together at this point, I know I'm still not over her yet. My heart still wants her. I still fantasize about how it would be to have a family and grow old with her. It's absurd. I really hope I don't take this baggage into the New Year with me. It's time for me to find someone with all her good qualities without the bad. I have to believe she's out there.
Mardelis Posted October 23, 2018 Posted October 23, 2018 Geez you were only together a few months total. You were broken up more than you were together. That's when things are at their best- in the beginning when everyone has their best foot forward and you don't smell the farts because the rose fragrance covers it all up. You simply weren't together long enough for the newness to wear off and you'd have seen it for the average or subpar relatonship it really was. You'll heal. You hardly even knew her. 1
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