Arty Posted September 10, 2005 Posted September 10, 2005 I have been seeing a guy for 1 year, lived together, engaged, broke off 2 months ago. On and off relationship since. He doesn't seem to take me or the relationship seriously. I spat it a number of times because of the way he treats me. I lost it again last night and told him I was seeing someone else so that he would back off completely, otherwise he just continues on with pretending there is nothing wrong with relationship. Feel horrible I did this but there seems to be no other way out. He just won't talk or get the hint. It has hurt me doing this but I am sure it is hurting him too. I do care about him alot but he treats me real bad and last night lied straight to my face. It is getting worse and I cannot have a relationship with a untrustworthy person, it isn't worth the hurt. He is an alcoholic by the way, which is no fun for me at all. I'm hurting like hell at the moment now all the anger has subsided. I get really angry when he treats me like dirt (which is good that I do get angry really) but afterward I relent and go back. Help please, I don't want to go back and I don't want to hurt so much. What to do?
Art_Critic Posted September 10, 2005 Posted September 10, 2005 the answer is all throughout you post . You mention you don't want to go back with him. Don't .. Remember he is an alcoholic.. It is a progressive disease and his drinking and the poor way he treats you will only get worse with time. You need to put your foot down and tell him to never contact you again and if he persists then change your number and if he shows up ( as alcoholics don't seem to get the hint ) then threaten to call the police and if he continues then you need to follow thru and call the police. Alcoholic or not NO means NO. You need time to heal so you can regain your thoughts. Do you live with anybody now ? Did you move back into his house and Do you have a place to go if it gets worse ?
betterwife Posted September 10, 2005 Posted September 10, 2005 Agree that you need to put your foot down. Start listening to your interself I don't want to go back to him. So, do what is necessary to not go back to him. that is not to contact him whatsoever, I don't care how charming he gets he will again treat you like dirt. change all of your numbers. try to relocate so he want know where you live. Have he put his hands on you if so if he continues to harass you, you need to go to the police and relocate ASAP because after you report him he doesn't need to know where you stay. This is a serious matter due to the fact he treat like dirt. Seek spiritual guidance such as a pastor or conselor
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