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Figuring out 1st date meetup


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Posted

There's someone online I've been chatting with for a bit and suggested meeting up this Saturday and she told me she already has plans to go to a sports event, but that meeting up sounds "lovely".

 

She's apparently a big tennis player and has a few pics of tennis on her profile and says she's looking forward to playing more. We talked about it and she's probably close to my level.

 

The issue with playing though is she is 30 min to an hour (if the expressway is backed up) away so we'd have to play late in the evening to avoid traffic and the only place I can find near her is a public park that's by a big field without much else around within walking distance. It's about a half mile away from town so not in the middle of nowhere. As safety is a big deal for women I don't know about playing with just the 2 of us with darkness around aside from the court lights. Normally I'd suggest playing in the morning next weekend, but I'm going to be going out of town. I'm guessing asking her to drive 20 minutes plus on the expressway to meet at a place closer to me wouldn't look good.

 

So I'm thinking I could meet her for lunch and a walk or take her to dinner during the week. I know it's not the most creative, but I don't want to lose her by spending too much time chatting online to try and find out her interests. I had another match where I asked her a lot of questions about what she liked trying to figure out what to do for a 1st date and she blocked me.

Posted

On the evening tennis courts, why not consult her about whether she's comfortable with those courts? Nothing wrong with that ... or see if she's got a recommended evening place that you don't know about.

 

Relax dude, you don't have to plan the date perfectly ... Just find a way to go out with her ... doesn't have to be perfect ....

 

BTW: I love your thinking on not getting all caught up in texting ...

Posted
There's someone online I've been chatting with for a bit and suggested meeting up this Saturday and she told me she already has plans to go to a sports event, but that meeting up sounds "lovely".

 

She's apparently a big tennis player and has a few pics of tennis on her profile and says she's looking forward to playing more. We talked about it and she's probably close to my level.

 

The issue with playing though is she is 30 min to an hour (if the expressway is backed up) away so we'd have to play late in the evening to avoid traffic and the only place I can find near her is a public park that's by a big field without much else around within walking distance. It's about a half mile away from town so not in the middle of nowhere. As safety is a big deal for women I don't know about playing with just the 2 of us with darkness around aside from the court lights. Normally I'd suggest playing in the morning next weekend, but I'm going to be going out of town. I'm guessing asking her to drive 20 minutes plus on the expressway to meet at a place closer to me wouldn't look good.

 

So I'm thinking I could meet her for lunch and a walk or take her to dinner during the week. I know it's not the most creative, but I don't want to lose her by spending too much time chatting online to try and find out her interests. I had another match where I asked her a lot of questions about what she liked trying to figure out what to do for a 1st date and she blocked me.

 

just ask her to lunch. at lunch, say i wanted to play tennis for our date but the logistics weren't right - we should do it the weekend after i get back from being away.

 

your heart and mind are in the right place, but explaining to her through messaging that you dont want to freak her out by taking her somewhere in a dark remote area might actually just freak her out lol. just go to lunch, and plan for tennis either in the dark after youve met a couple times or in the light for your next date!

  • Like 1
Posted
just ask her to lunch. at lunch, say i wanted to play tennis for our date but the logistics weren't right - we should do it the weekend after i get back from being away.

 

your heart and mind are in the right place, but explaining to her through messaging that you dont want to freak her out by taking her somewhere in a dark remote area might actually just freak her out lol. just go to lunch, and plan for tennis either in the dark after youve met a couple times or in the light for your next date!

 

Bingo. Problem solved.

Posted

tennis, or any sport for that matter, is not a good choice to get to know one another. meet her somewhere in between for happy hour and if things go well you can have dinner too :)

Posted

While I think it’s a pretty creative idea it might not be the best for a date... by definition you will put a net between the two of you!

Posted

I love playing tennis, but would never want to play for a first date. For that, I want to look my cutest, wear a dress and makeup. I'll get sweaty with him once he wins me over a little ;)

 

Lunch or dinner is a good choice. If she's interested, that will be just fine. If not, there's no point, anyway.

Posted

The location / activity for a 1st meet up does not have to be creative. Dial down the pressure you are putting on yourself. Lunch is fine. Dinner is probably too much of a commitment / expense. As somebody else pointed out, tennis as a 1st meet is a no go. She does not want you to see her sweaty & gross.

Posted

creativity is not important. The main thing in the relationship is trust and sincerity

  • Author
Posted
The location / activity for a 1st meet up does not have to be creative. Dial down the pressure you are putting on yourself. Lunch is fine. Dinner is probably too much of a commitment / expense. As somebody else pointed out, tennis as a 1st meet is a no go. She does not want you to see her sweaty & gross.

 

From the pictures she's extremely attractive so I find it hard to picture her sweaty and gross, but I see your point. I asked her to lunch instead so we'll see what happens.

  • Like 2
Posted
From the pictures she's extremely attractive so I find it hard to picture her sweaty and gross, but I see your point. I asked her to lunch instead so we'll see what happens.

 

good job man

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