ar1489 Posted October 15, 2018 Posted October 15, 2018 Hi all, The other day at the gym a guy asked me out- he's seemed to have his eye on me for a while but had only recently introduced himself to me. I took down his number, but I have recently started seeing someone so spent the day thinking about how I should handle this. I ended up texting him letting him know that I was very flattered, but I recently started seeing someone and I would let him know if my situation changed. He responded that he was appreciative of my honesty. Saw him at the gym for the next few days and we didn't really even look at each other. I also began regretting my decision. I started thinking about how I actually did want to go on a date with this guy, and had I let myself think on it a little more I probably would have accepted. A few days go by and the awkwardness is too much for me to handle (especially in a place I love to be, like my gym). Before a Saturday class that we take together, I greeted him and spoke with him for a bit. After class, he came up to me and was very friendly so I figured why not, and asked him if he wanted to grab a smoothie from the place in our gym. He agreed, and we ended up talking for about 40 minutes. I explained that I had thought about it for the week and was regretful of my initial denial, and tried to explain my situation a little more clearer by saying that it's not that I can't really get to know someone else (but it may have just made us both more confused). Afterward, I thanked him for the smoothie and he thanked me for joining him and said it was nice to get to know me more. I'm wondering now what he is thinking? Did the smoothie situation just make it seem like I was clearing the air so we could gym without awkwardness, or does it seem like maybe he could read that I would actually like to give something a shot? Do you think he has likely ruled me out since maybe I appeared wishy-washy or indecisive? He did mention that he had been wanting to ask me out for a while, but my assumption is that he probably is still thinking of me as "off limits" as I originally said I was seeing somebody. Need some other opinions. thanks!
smackie9 Posted October 15, 2018 Posted October 15, 2018 Sounds like things got smoooooothed over. Don't over think it, just keep being friendly with him to build up a rapport that later will be your advantage. 2
Versacehottie Posted October 16, 2018 Posted October 16, 2018 I think if you want to date him that you've done the right thing. He's probably a little confused about how to proceed. You may need to give him a little help. Good luck
MaleIntuition Posted October 16, 2018 Posted October 16, 2018 Yeah, he is probably very confused now. And honestly, so am I. Changed your mind about multi-dating or what happend to the first guy? Give it a couple of days, if he doesn’t ask you out; considering asking him. Some men aren’t very good with subtle hints.
Author ar1489 Posted October 16, 2018 Author Posted October 16, 2018 Yeah, he is probably very confused now. And honestly, so am I. Changed your mind about multi-dating or what happend to the first guy? Give it a couple of days, if he doesn’t ask you out; considering asking him. Some men aren’t very good with subtle hints. honestly, i am too lol. And it's no ones fault but my own. But yes, I am having second thoughts about being committed to a situation that I am not sure is a long-term, exclusive thing. I initially didn't want to complicate my situation, and thought just dating one person was easiest, but the idea that I could be missing out on a good thing for something that is not exclusive does not seem fair to anyone involved. (I started feeling this way after I told him that I could not hang out with him, I was pretty regretful for several days wishing I had not spoke so soon). I guess the struggle I am faced with here is that I basically have to see this guy every morning if I want to keep my regular gym routine. So it makes it a bit more confusing. It's a small gym and pretty hard to not cross paths, especially because we take classes together. We got coffee on a saturday and I saw him this morning from across the room- neither of us made an effort to go say hello. It feels a bit like rejection from him, but I'm not sure if maybe he doesn't want to interrupt my work out, or if he's just no longer interested after hearing I could be seeing someone or after getting to know me a bit more. Sad because he said he had wanted to ask me out for ages! I myself could have said Hi but I feel like I really put myself out there on saturday asking for coffee and I could use a little reassurance that he enjoyed spending time with me
alphamale Posted October 16, 2018 Posted October 16, 2018 did you give him your phone #? if not, give it to him and ask him to call. if, and when, he does call for a date say yes even if the date involves swimming in pig sh*t at 4am...
Author ar1489 Posted October 16, 2018 Author Posted October 16, 2018 did you give him your phone #? if not, give it to him and ask him to call. if, and when, he does call for a date say yes even if the date involves swimming in pig sh*t at 4am... haha. yes, he does have my number. if he does text or call, i will definitely say yes for a date! I just worry that he won't since I had previously told him I couldnt go out with him, but post-rejection I was the one that invited him for coffee! I'm confusing.
alphamale Posted October 16, 2018 Posted October 16, 2018 haha. yes, he does have my number. if he does text or call, i will definitely say yes for a date! I just worry that he won't since I had previously told him I couldnt go out with him, but post-rejection I was the one that invited him for coffee! I'm confusing. no, most likely he'll call/text you...just give him some time to regroup. maybe stay away from the gym for a few days
Author ar1489 Posted October 16, 2018 Author Posted October 16, 2018 no, most likely he'll call/text you...just give him some time to regroup. maybe stay away from the gym for a few days already changed up my workout schedule for the next couple days and I am going to be away this weekend. maybe he will wonder where I went and reach out
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