ConfusedCollegeDude Posted October 10, 2018 Posted October 10, 2018 I’m a freshman in college and I’ve met this girl whom I’ve known for about a good month and a half now. It wasn’t until around hurricane Florence that we began to spend a significant amount of time together. Since then, I’ve found myself spending a lot of alone time with her to the point where we wouldn’t go to bed till around 2 in the morning. She’s really nice around me yet is comfortable enough to be sassy and make jokes. I’ve also noticed lately that she’s become a lot more comfortable around me and revealed a teeny bit more about her more “inner” personality that she downplays and hides very well to others. We’re always laughing with each other when we’re together. Her mom even knows me well enough to give me a hug when we first met. In addition, her roommate has said that she would talk about me often when they head to bed after me leaving and usually in the aftermath of us spending time she’s usually smiling and talking about me. I live in a suite-style residence hall and a lot of the people on my floor say that they notice her being particularly “happy” when I’m around compared to when other guys are around her. A good friend of mine said she notices how her eyes react when we spend time together. In short, everybody says that so far the signs are falling in my favor. But at the same time, they also aren’t sure since the girl is inexperienced and never had a boyfriend (or even held hands) with anyone. They don’t know if they want to justify the “negative” signs to her inexperience or how she truly feels. We also don’t know if she caught on or not cause everybody else on our floor knows, we can’t attribute this to whether she’s totally clueless on what guys do when they like her or she’s just ignoring it. So where I’m stuck at is what do I do? I plan on letting her know sooner or later and most everybody has told me to give it a couple of more weeks to make sure my assumptions are solidified. At the moment we have a very good “friendship” that I’m really not willing to risk if I turn out to be incorrect, this is why I’m so hesitant on making a move.
zouz71 Posted October 10, 2018 Posted October 10, 2018 Dude , So let me ask you one quick question because it seems that you are taking wrong vibes from ppl around . who cares about them ? who will be happy with her or sad , you or them ? it is about you and her , do you want a professional sex provider or a girl to share great mon=ments with ?
Author ConfusedCollegeDude Posted October 10, 2018 Author Posted October 10, 2018 Dude , So let me ask you one quick question because it seems that you are taking wrong vibes from ppl around . who cares about them ? who will be happy with her or sad , you or them ? it is about you and her , do you want a professional sex provider or a girl to share great mon=ments with ? The latter, quality time is #1 for me.
smackie9 Posted October 10, 2018 Posted October 10, 2018 OK this is where you need to know about adult relationships....men want attachment and sex. You don't go anywhere with if you fritter around too long....you get dumped into the friend zone. Make a bloody move. Ask her out on a date, compliment her take her hand, move in for a kiss. If you don't this, you will be stuck with a bunch of girls that are friends, and very frustrated. Take the risk.
alphamale Posted October 10, 2018 Posted October 10, 2018 dude...sorry but you're in the dreaded friendzone
dispatch3d Posted October 10, 2018 Posted October 10, 2018 Well I enjoyed reading the first two paragraphs, the third I didn't like too much. One and a half months seems like friend zone territory but then again I'm not very good with the ladies anyways.
OnlyHonesty Posted October 10, 2018 Posted October 10, 2018 ...give it a couple of more weeks to make sure my assumptions are solidified. You seem to misunderstand attraction. You don't make assumptions, you generate and build it through your actions, interactions, touch, vibe etc. If you present yourself as a friend, then that is how she will see you. The friendzone is generally not what women put men in, it's what men put themselves in. If you want this to be more than friends, then you need to start acting that way. It's much easier when you present yourself as more than just a friend from the start though. Since you've been her friend, to change this to attraction might not work and may seem out of place. 1
alphamale Posted October 10, 2018 Posted October 10, 2018 The friendzone is generally not what women put men in, it's what men put themselves in. I think that both sexes tend to put others in the dreaded friend zone
snowboy91 Posted October 10, 2018 Posted October 10, 2018 I'm reading your post over and over and I can't seem to see how she is being difficult to read. There isn't much about her behaviour that is confusing. You stay up until 2am talking, you know each other well, and everyone's noticing how happy she is around you. Make a move already. Hold her hand. Ask her out on a date. You're leaving it very late being 1.5 months but hey, you guys are young, inexperienced and probably nervous (especially her). She probably really likes you and doesn't know how to act on it with you. She's in the same state of indecision as you... add to that the social expectation that guys have to make the move (not girls) and she feels she can't do anything except wait. Like I said, go for it.
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