Orokotikki Posted October 5, 2018 Posted October 5, 2018 This will be either our first or seventh wedding anniversary. 7th since marriage, first full year since R from W's A. Haven't bought a gift yet, thoughts? I have mixed feelings and was feeling pretty OK (read detached) but now feeling pretty anxious about it. Big gift, small gift, no gift? She (I think) has been working hard at R. There's been some problems and dissatisfaction. In past I usually gave big gifts, but my funds are also a bit depleted due to expenses since the A (IC, MC, Storage unit, prescriptions). I don't know, what were other people's experience about anniversary after R?
Betrayed&Stayed Posted October 5, 2018 Posted October 5, 2018 I don't know, what were other people's experience about anniversary after R? The first few post D-Day were very low-key. Year 1 was concert with kids. Year 2 and 3 were breakfast dates. After a few years of trying, I said f' it. It's not worth the effort of reframing the date and wrestling the triggers. For me, there's nothing the celebrate. Good luck! Trust me, chuck the anniversary date. Pick another one that makes sense for you. 1
Author Orokotikki Posted October 5, 2018 Author Posted October 5, 2018 Thanks for replying. Its embarrassing really. Feel so conflicted about it. She just started some expensive diet plan which puts dinner out of the question, we cancelled going to the cabin b/c of kitten just had surgery and tries to pull at stitches, we have no kids, our only time apart is when I'm at work. MC was cancelled today and last week by counselor b/c he had training. Guess part of me is scared she'll "Not feel her effort is recognized" if I do too little, or if I do too much I'll feel resentful. Well at least it will be a long weekend I took Monday off.
Mr. Lucky Posted October 6, 2018 Posted October 6, 2018 I don't know, what were other people's experience about anniversary after R? Wish I could help you, but we never made it to the anniversary date, R didn't last. Lots of reasons involved, but the split was mainly a result of my wife's inability to do the hard work involved. I will say, right before we separated and ultimately divorced, my birthday fell. My wife got me a pretty nice bike I wanted but, for reasons I never fully understood, I couldn't make myself ride it. Freud would probably have a field day with the whole issue. So I understand the struggle with occasions tied to the marriage. Keep it low key and as stress free as possible... Mr. Lucky 2
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