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Is it too early to ask for a date?


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Posted (edited)

Is it too early to ask someone on Monday to go on a date Saturday? I don’t want to come across too needy or desperate or like I don’t have a life. They are busy all week and so am I with work etc

 

Ps this is not a first date we have been seeing each other on off two months

Edited by SBM1111
Posted

No. I think giving as much notice as possible is nice. There are some people who might not quite know their availability yet, because of work or something else, but that can happen anytime.

Posted

you have been dating off and on for two months....you feel you are being turned down because you don't give enough notice? Is she always telling you she's busy?

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Posted
you have been dating off and on for two months....you feel you are being turned down because you don't give enough notice? Is she always telling you she's busy?

 

No I don’t. I’m a she. And no he doesn’t always tell me but I just don’t want to come across as too needy or like I have no one else or putting him first by asking him so early in the week

Posted

I always say to plan dates about a week out. Set the date on a Monday or Tuesday for a weekend date. It is kind of a no-brainer.

Posted

No it's not too early.

 

What is causing all the doubt?

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Posted
No it's not too early.

 

What is causing all the doubt?

 

Fear of rejection

Posted

You have been seeing each other for 2 months, why do you still fear rejection? Something is off here.

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Posted
You have been seeing each other for 2 months, why do you still fear rejection? Something is off here.

 

I fear he is pulling back a little as he hasn’t asked me out in a week and he usually does. So I’m taking a chance and asking him but I’m afraid he’s loosing interest and will brush me off that’s why

Posted

Ahhh

 

He could be pulling back to see if you step up & ask / treat him.

 

If he is ghosting better to find out sooner then later. Go ahead & ask.

Posted
Ahhh

 

He could be pulling back to see if you step up & ask / treat him.

 

If he is ghosting better to find out sooner then later. Go ahead & ask.

Or the insecurities that are driving all this fear have already been displaying themselves in tons of other ways,...and he is running from it.

 

If I was seeing a woman that was always in such a state of fearfulness, it would have me exhausted after 3 months.

 

To the OP:

A week doesn't amount to squat. Yes it would catch attention if it wasn't common, but that is just because a pattern was started and now broken. But all by itself, stand-alone, a week is not a long time. Instead of worrying about asking him out, just call him, by a voice call, and ask how things are going, and see what his response is and how his voice sounds. You don't have to ask him out.

Posted

The only way to know if he's lost interest is to ask him to do something. Just ask him casually, and you'll have your answer. Not asking doesn't change the way he feels.

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Posted

So I asked he said he has plans this Saturday. He did suggest we could meet tonight (Wednesday) if he didn’t end up going to (abc) with his mates (he was unsure at the time) and I said yes that would suit but I haven’t heard from him since. He hasn’t text back in 24 hours but he hasn’t been online either. I know he has an exam today so assume that took priority. Either way I still don’t know what his plan is for tonight as he did indicate it was possible. Should I hold out see if he texts and if he doesn’t move on?

Posted
So I asked he said he has plans this Saturday. He did suggest we could meet tonight (Wednesday) if he didn’t end up going to (abc) with his mates (he was unsure at the time) and I said yes that would suit but I haven’t heard from him since. He hasn’t text back in 24 hours but he hasn’t been online either. I know he has an exam today so assume that took priority. Either way I still don’t know what his plan is for tonight as he did indicate it was possible. Should I hold out see if he texts and if he doesn’t move on?

 

He basically said he would meet with you if he didn't end up going with his mates. It doesn't sound like he has tentative plans with his mates but is still willing to put them before seeing you. I agree that he is backing off. He should rather see you.

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