penangtravel Posted September 30, 2018 Posted September 30, 2018 The last two dates I have been on both guys kissed me at the end - not just a peck, a full on kiss but did not message for a second date. In all honesty neither person was 100% my cup of tea. Despite having a fun time and getting on well for the evening, I did not feel that either would be compatible LT. I definitely did not feel much attraction for no 1, but more for no 2. I was a bit taken aback that No 1 kissed me as didnt feel the chemistry. At the end of the date No 1 said next time he should come to my part of town next time and to message when he came home, so I did - his responses were polite but did not lead to any conversation I sent 2 messages in total. No 2 I felt more attraction for and we were quite flirty, but could see that we were from v different worlds and that it wouldn't work LT. On the walk to the station we were more 'touchy feely' so the kiss was more expected. He also said to message when I was home, but he messaged first which was nice, and we had a little conversation. Next morning he replied to one of my messages, I replied, then he replied again, but when I replied he ignored me! I stupidly messaged again later that day thinking that it was perhaps it was because I didn't ask a question - he responded quickly but no questions etc so I just left it. I didn't message all day yesterday but saw he had updated his profile pic on text so just sent a message nice pic - he asked me how my day went but the conversation felt v flat... so I just said well good luck on your dating adventures and that it was nice to meet him. I know I should have probably 'played it cool' and not messaged but Id rather just cut it off. I just don't understand why they would kiss me and why no 2 seemed keen but just fizzled? Was it too much contact? Did I just ignore the lack of compatibility just because I'm looking for a relationship?
carhill Posted September 30, 2018 Posted September 30, 2018 Don't know about the guys but IME women like to kiss because that tells them more about sexual compatibility. Back in the day, when one or two dates didn't turn into more, kissing was an important part of that. I had to learn to kiss early and often or the ladies wouldn't progress. In my generation, the ladies chose and they generally chose guys who were confident, forward and sexual early. No ambiguity. In your case, if they're typical single guys, they're out dating numerous ladies and doing the numbers game. Some, like apparently you, didn't work out. That doesn't mean they won't enjoy the intimate squishy human contact for the moment though.
ThisisIt606 Posted September 30, 2018 Posted September 30, 2018 Some guys try a kiss as a last resort to test if there is chemistry. Since you weren’t feeling either one, it doesn’t seem to be a huge loss for you. I don’t think the kiss really meant anything but just covering all bases so to speak to see if there was any spark/ chemistry between you both.
Lotsgoingon Posted October 1, 2018 Posted October 1, 2018 I think some guys just don't want to face the reality that there is no chemistry on the date ... Lots of guys feel this pressure to take a chance, make a physical connection and so instead of just saying, "good to meet you, good luck," they move in for a kiss. This happens, I think, when the guy likes you but simply doesn't want to admit that you don't have much in common. Oh ... the second guy .. he just faked the interest longer ... with his initial texts. Seriously, lots of guys aren't good at figuring out the difference between this is a good person ... vs. this person and I have chemistry and potential. Sounds like you read the situation well in each case. Your instincts seem on the money. Seriously, keep trusting those instincts ... You avoid a lot of problems down the line that way. So many relationships are plagued by this basic problem: there isn't chemistry ... The two people ignore this and push forward ... and then he relationship inevitably crashes.
MaleIntuition Posted October 1, 2018 Posted October 1, 2018 People date at dates different pace. You could be a bit more patient, Number two was probably interested if given a bit more space...
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