sunflowerandclouds94 Posted September 30, 2018 Posted September 30, 2018 I met up with my online date. He asked me out for lunch. He didn't confirm before the date so I had to send a text saying are we still on 1 hour before the date. We met and he seemed quiet or like nervous. We talked and he's pretty nerdy. He's plays dungeon and dragons kind of nerdy (which I like) but also knows how to go out and socialize. We talk and have a good time however I noticed I was the one asking more of the wuestions. He tells me we should try another place out similar to the one we are at now. He extends for me to pick the next food place for us to try out. We finished and he invited me to get more dessert after to extend the date. We talk more and he asks to see me tomorrow to do an activity. I told him unfortunately I can't but I can do next weekend. He says okay. He thanked me for coming to meet him like twice. We finished and we go our separate ways. He didn't text me after the date. So I sent the text saying I had a good time and I found a good spot we should try out! He said he had a good/fun time as well and we should definitely do that. So I added that on to Saturday with an activity which he said sounds like a plan. After that I tried to keep the text convo going but he stopped messaging. Is this normal? Is he not a texter? Is he breadcrumbing me? I'm talking to others guys as well but Im just curious do guys who show so much interest not text the girl they're interested in?
smackie9 Posted September 30, 2018 Posted September 30, 2018 Sounds to me he's not very good at dating or he's been burned so many times, he's wary of putting in effort. Be more accommodating and hopefully he will final man up and take some initiative...take the lead.
Author sunflowerandclouds94 Posted September 30, 2018 Author Posted September 30, 2018 Sounds to me he's not very good at dating or he's been burned so many times, he's wary of putting in effort. Be more accommodating and hopefully he will final man up and take some initiative...take the lead. Okay, so how should I take the texting then? I sent the last text. If he doesn't respond in like 5 days should I text him again? I don't want to seem too clingy or trying to get in his space
BaileyB Posted September 30, 2018 Posted September 30, 2018 If he is breadcrumbing you, he’s not leaving many breadcrumbs... Seriously, it sounds like you are the one doing most of the work - before, during, and after the date. I would put my money on the fact that he doesn’t know how this is done... although, he may not be very interested. Keep your expectations reasonable. Remember, it has been one date. If you want to get a sense of how he is feeling, quit making the effort and see if he steps up. Good luck. 1
Author sunflowerandclouds94 Posted September 30, 2018 Author Posted September 30, 2018 If he is breadcrumbing you, he’s not leaving many breadcrumbs... Seriously, it sounds like you are the one doing most of the work - before, during, and after the date. I would put my money on the fact that he doesn’t know how this is done... although, he may not be very interested. Keep your expectations reasonable. Remember, it has been one date. If you want to get a sense of how he is feeling, quit making the effort and see if he steps up. Good luck. Yeah I'm not going to message but I have a feeling he's not going to text. I havebt heard from him today I don't get it. Why do guys act so interested and set up another date but act distant after? The dating game is so screwed. Or they're always getting over an ex or something? I swear I'm not that troublesome
nospam99 Posted September 30, 2018 Posted September 30, 2018 He says okay. He thanked me for coming to meet him like twice. We finished and we go our separate ways. He didn't text me after the date. So I sent the text saying I had a good time and I found a good spot we should try out! He said he had a good/fun time as well and we should definitely do that. So I added that on to Saturday with an activity which he said sounds like a plan. After that I tried to keep the text convo going but he stopped messaging. Is this normal? Is he not a texter? Is he breadcrumbing me? I'm talking to others guys as well but Im just curious do guys who show so much interest not text the girl they're interested in? Geez, ladies. Hell YES it's normal (for me)! He said he enjoyed the date and made another date. Saturday? There are SIX freaking days to work out the details. If I'm FALLING IN LOVE AND she's interested in daily communication, I'll phone every day. Otherwise (and this sounds like it), it's only a dating relationship and plans have been made for 'next time'. Give it time and get a life! 1
Author sunflowerandclouds94 Posted September 30, 2018 Author Posted September 30, 2018 Geez, ladies. Hell YES it's normal (for me)! He said he enjoyed the date and made another date. Saturday? There are SIX freaking days to work out the details. If I'm FALLING IN LOVE AND she's interested in daily communication, I'll phone every day. Otherwise (and this sounds like it), it's only a dating relationship and plans have been made for 'next time'. Give it time and get a life! We already worked out the details. But okay I see what you mean. I just think it's weird because I'm so used to texting in between all the time. Even then just a Have a nice Sunday would suffice. Meh.
BaileyB Posted September 30, 2018 Posted September 30, 2018 I just think it's weird because I'm so used to texting in between all the time. Sure, if you are in a relationship with the guy... But,mYou have had one date so far. You've spent a few hours together... For all you know, he's on another date with another girl today... Keep your expectations reasonable and see how things go. 1
Author sunflowerandclouds94 Posted September 30, 2018 Author Posted September 30, 2018 Sure, if you are in a relationship with the guy... But,mYou have had one date so far. You've spent a few hours together... For all you know, he's on another date with another girl today... Keep your expectations reasonable and see how things go. But we messaged each other everyday before we went on the date....... Like I understand what you're saying but like it's just weird. Yeah he could be on another date too. I'm just going to assume we have our date on Saturday. But if he doesn't text to confirm the day of should I even bother to remind him? Because he didn't do that for the first date.
BaileyB Posted September 30, 2018 Posted September 30, 2018 I'm just going to assume we have our date on Saturday. But if he doesn't text to confirm the day of should I even bother to remind him? Because he didn't do that for the first date. Sure, send him a text Thursday night or Friday morning and say "I'm looking forward to seeing you again. Are we still on for Saturday?" There is no reason why you can't do that...
Noproblem Posted September 30, 2018 Posted September 30, 2018 Is he even a catch? I don't know he seems to me like the type of guy who doesn't chat much. I think he'll open up once he gets to know you better.
Author sunflowerandclouds94 Posted October 1, 2018 Author Posted October 1, 2018 Is he even a catch? I don't know he seems to me like the type of guy who doesn't chat much. I think he'll open up once he gets to know you better. Hmm he's attractive to me. I've been known to have weird taste in guys though lol Hmm he's simple dressed, quiet and not much of a chatter when I went on the date with him. But he seems to hangout with old co-workers/friends a lot. Idk he didn't text me all day today so we will see if he reaches out by Thursday or Friday I guess.
Logo Posted October 1, 2018 Posted October 1, 2018 I met up with my online date. He asked me out for lunch. He didn't confirm before the date so I had to send a text saying are we still on 1 hour before the date. We met and he seemed quiet or like nervous. We talked and he's pretty nerdy. He's plays dungeon and dragons kind of nerdy (which I like) but also knows how to go out and socialize. We talk and have a good time however I noticed I was the one asking more of the wuestions. He tells me we should try another place out similar to the one we are at now. He extends for me to pick the next food place for us to try out. We finished and he invited me to get more dessert after to extend the date. We talk more and he asks to see me tomorrow to do an activity. I told him unfortunately I can't but I can do next weekend. He says okay. He thanked me for coming to meet him like twice. We finished and we go our separate ways. He didn't text me after the date. So I sent the text saying I had a good time and I found a good spot we should try out! He said he had a good/fun time as well and we should definitely do that. So I added that on to Saturday with an activity which he said sounds like a plan. After that I tried to keep the text convo going but he stopped messaging. Is this normal? Is he not a texter? Is he breadcrumbing me? I'm talking to others guys as well but Im just curious do guys who show so much interest not text the girl they're interested in? Guys know that texting women too much, especially early on, can send them running for the hills. Give him the benefit of the doubt. Is it possible that he picked up on a vibe from you that you’re “shopping around”, talking to other men?
I'veseenbetterlol Posted October 1, 2018 Posted October 1, 2018 If a guy liked you, then no, not normal not to be responsive. Every guy who I've successfully dated was always responsive after the date.
Logo Posted October 1, 2018 Posted October 1, 2018 sunflowerandclouds94, I want to add something and say, when someone is interested in you, they will either reciprocate or chase after you. There is a limit to how much you can chase after someone. If he's not give you the time of day, or if he's playing hot and cold, then you deserve better. **** him. Move on. You'll find someone better out there. I'd much rather be a relationship where someone comes to me and maintains her interest in me, than have to win her over by constantly chasing after her. Who knows, maybe his ego gets off on it; I have zero tolerance for people like that.
Author sunflowerandclouds94 Posted October 1, 2018 Author Posted October 1, 2018 Guys know that texting women too much, especially early on, can send them running for the hills. Give him the benefit of the doubt. Is it possible that he picked up on a vibe from you that you’re “shopping around”, talking to other men? Hm I don't think so. I put in my profile that I'm looking to date and not have hookups. He put in his that he's looking for something serious. I mean he kept saying he wanted to see me but then he fell off the face of the Earth 2 days ago. I think he just ghosted me tbh. I don't want to embarrass myself and even ask if we are meeting on Saturday tbh.
Author sunflowerandclouds94 Posted October 1, 2018 Author Posted October 1, 2018 sunflowerandclouds94, I want to add something and say, when someone is interested in you, they will either reciprocate or chase after you. There is a limit to how much you can chase after someone. If he's not give you the time of day, or if he's playing hot and cold, then you deserve better. **** him. Move on. You'll find someone better out there. I'd much rather be a relationship where someone comes to me and maintains her interest in me, than have to win her over by constantly chasing after her. Who knows, maybe his ego gets off on it; I have zero tolerance for people like that. Yeah I have no idea what happened tbh. He literally fell off the face of the Earth. I think he ghosted me? Idk.... Should I try texting him again or just wait to see if he messages? He hasn't messaged in like 2 days though. :/
preraph Posted October 1, 2018 Posted October 1, 2018 (edited) You have a date set up. If you talk all week, what have you got left to say during the date. Just assume the date is going forward. Do not text again. I see no sign he's blowing you off. Not everyone has time to text all the time. A guy knows they have to do it at first to get you to trust them enough to meet them. Now, he said it sounds like a plan for Saturday, so no reason not to think so. What does he do for work? Can he afford frequent dating? Was he hinting you pay for the next one, best you can tell? I'm trying to imagine what a Dungeons and Dragons guy does for a living.... Edited October 1, 2018 by preraph
nospam99 Posted October 1, 2018 Posted October 1, 2018 I'm trying to imagine what a Dungeons and Dragons guy does for a living.... Nuclear physicists, software engineers, project managers, physicians, surgeons, attorneys, cops, airline pilots, construction tradesmen, oh ... and penniless liberal arts majors. We're a pretty eclectic bunch
Author sunflowerandclouds94 Posted October 1, 2018 Author Posted October 1, 2018 You have a date set up. If you talk all week, what have you got left to say during the date. Just assume the date is going forward. Do not text again. I see no sign he's blowing you off. Not everyone has time to text all the time. A guy knows they have to do it at first to get you to trust them enough to meet them. Now, he said it sounds like a plan for Saturday, so no reason not to think so. What does he do for work? Can he afford frequent dating? Was he hinting you pay for the next one, best you can tell? I'm trying to imagine what a Dungeons and Dragons guy does for a living.... Lol he works part time. He was a manager but then left to finish school then became part time again to start from the bottom. Nothing too huge actually but this is just first date talk. He could be lying. But yeah I haven't texted him. Haven't heard from him since either.
dispatch3d Posted October 2, 2018 Posted October 2, 2018 We already worked out the details. But okay I see what you mean. I just think it's weird because I'm so used to texting in between all the time. Even then just a Have a nice Sunday would suffice. Meh. I never got into the good morning texts some guys send every day? I read one thread where a guy did that - blew me away. I could never text to that degree. Plus the dating guru's now say not to overtext, and for the most part they are probably right. It's also not natural for me - if I meet a girl one time my interest is (usually) not that high and I won't text as much as a result. If I've known a girl for a year and she's the one I like I'll probably blow her phone up all the time, its all relative.
Author sunflowerandclouds94 Posted October 2, 2018 Author Posted October 2, 2018 I never got into the good morning texts some guys send every day? I read one thread where a guy did that - blew me away. I could never text to that degree. Plus the dating guru's now say not to overtext, and for the most part they are probably right. It's also not natural for me - if I meet a girl one time my interest is (usually) not that high and I won't text as much as a result. If I've known a girl for a year and she's the one I like I'll probably blow her phone up all the time, its all relative. That's what I'm saying. I mean it's been two -three days. You would think even a how's your day in between would be ok. Doesn't have to be a full blown conversation. The guy literally just stopped messaging and fell off the face of the Earth. I feel like I've been ghosted.... Now that I remember. I've had guys plan a date for a weekend and then stop talking me in between the date and they never replied the day of the date.
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