cdjudd Posted September 23, 2018 Posted September 23, 2018 I have been with my girlfriend for about two and a half years. As of recently, she made some news friends at work and her behavior towards me has changed significantly. At first, I was happy to see she found some new friends that were much better for her than the last ones but as time has gone on, I don't feel as positive as I did about it. The first night she went and hung out with these girls, she fell off the grid until 3:30 in the morning, after not hearing from her since 8 that night. By the time she got back with me, it was apparent that she was highly intoxicated. She was all over the place screaming at me then crying the next. I ended up giving her a chance to show me this wouldn't happen again until she did it not once but twice more. The first time I said I wasn't comfortable with her shutting down bars as a thirty year-old woman. Then the next time she lied to me about what time she actually got home, in order to avoid me being upset. Also, a key point is she has an alcohol problem that isn't so much stemmed from the amount of drinking but more of behavioral changes when drinking liquor. I have tried speaking with her, asking if she needs to figure out what she wants and if there is someone else but she hasn't admitted to either. We both have been through trauma's while together, her sister committing suicide and my mother being murdered. I don't know what else to do any more or if I can rely on her to identify her own needs. Any suggestions or thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
smackie9 Posted September 23, 2018 Posted September 23, 2018 Ya have a firm talk to her about her drinking problem and suggest you both go to Al-anon or AA together. And you both find a grief counselor.
coolheadal Posted September 23, 2018 Posted September 23, 2018 I am in something like that now too my friend. I've tried everything the lies of promises still doesn't register in her head. She met this woman and drop me out and gone then had the nerve to say it was my fault. I was so glad when her new gf got a new bf. So now she's back to normal. Still will go out for 12 hrs get drunk. They are some times called sociopath. Doesn't do much good talking about it with her. Girls night out is what yours is doing. Got to nip that in the bucket. She has you, do you live with this girl or not. Living with her she should be happen to be with you only, but then the sociopath (lies etc comes out of her) Sounds like you really care, like, love or in love with her to stick by her to this long!
Marc878 Posted September 23, 2018 Posted September 23, 2018 I have been with my girlfriend for about two and a half years. As of recently, she made some news friends at work and her behavior towards me has changed significantly. At first, I was happy to see she found some new friends that were much better for her than the last ones but as time has gone on, I don't feel as positive as I did about it. The first night she went and hung out with these girls, she fell off the grid until 3:30 in the morning, after not hearing from her since 8 that night. By the time she got back with me, it was apparent that she was highly intoxicated. She was all over the place screaming at me then crying the next. I ended up giving her a chance to show me this wouldn't happen again until she did it not once but twice more. The first time I said I wasn't comfortable with her shutting down bars as a thirty year-old woman. Then the next time she lied to me about what time she actually got home, in order to avoid me being upset. Also, a key point is she has an alcohol problem that isn't so much stemmed from the amount of drinking but more of behavioral changes when drinking liquor. I have tried speaking with her, asking if she needs to figure out what she wants and if there is someone else but she hasn't admitted to either. We both have been through trauma's while together, her sister committing suicide and my mother being murdered. I don't know what else to do any more or if I can rely on her to identify her own needs. Any suggestions or thoughts would be greatly appreciated. It's only an abusive realtionship if you continue to take it. Which is what you're doing. Why?
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