guest569 Posted September 22, 2018 Posted September 22, 2018 He's marrried or in a relationship also crossed my mind. Any thoughts? His initial email was all business. His texts were just chit chat. You were the one initiating the flirtiness. Maybe he flirts back and likes you but so what? Are you willing to act on it when you're in the same business circle? Hmm I wouldnt go there.
guest569 Posted September 22, 2018 Posted September 22, 2018 He sent me this email: “Hey it was very nice meeting you :-) If you need any help with anything in the future, just let me know and I’d love to see how I can help.” I never replied to this Seriously, how is this "very flirty"?
Author lovelymay Posted September 22, 2018 Author Posted September 22, 2018 Seriously, how is this "very flirty"? Yeah I left some things out of context. I saw him at a business drink and he kept pouring wine in only my glass... This was just a phrase out of his email which I found back now, it's originally with this sentence as well: "It was very nice meeting you and I hope you liked the wine :)" I just think it's a bit flirty to use smileys, and to pour wine especially in my glass and in a business email refer to the wine. He didn't pour so much wine in other people's glasses haha I don't know what to do with this. I like him but I just don't want to ruïn things...
Author lovelymay Posted September 22, 2018 Author Posted September 22, 2018 Anyway we haven't texted now for almost a week so I guess he's either: 1. Initially only flirting, maybe bored? 2. Lost interest because I said something wrong? 3. Lost interest because because he doesn't want to mix business with pleasure 4. he's with someone else maybe... I'm not sure if he's with someone else. My friends who work with him think he's single but they're not sure either.
stillafool Posted September 22, 2018 Posted September 22, 2018 Yeah I left some things out of context. I saw him at a business drink and he kept pouring wine in only my glass... This was just a phrase out of his email which I found back now, it's originally with this sentence as well: "It was very nice meeting you and I hope you liked the wine :)" I just think it's a bit flirty to use smileys, and to pour wine especially in my glass and in a business email refer to the wine. He didn't pour so much wine in other people's glasses haha I don't know what to do with this. I like him but I just don't want to ruïn things... Was this before or after you sent the letter with your boss's gift? Why would you write him a letter with the gift? Didn't you feel that was unprofessional?
shydad Posted September 22, 2018 Posted September 22, 2018 I don't know what to do with this. I like him but I just don't want to ruïn things... How could things be ruined? If your end goal is to spend time with him, and you're already not doing that, there is literally nothing to lose and no risk involved that I can see.
Author lovelymay Posted September 22, 2018 Author Posted September 22, 2018 Was this before or after you sent the letter with your boss's gift? Why would you write him a letter with the gift? Didn't you feel that was unprofessional? His was before. I wrote it because it had to be personalised. It was a professional business letter though.
Author lovelymay Posted September 22, 2018 Author Posted September 22, 2018 How could things be ruined? If your end goal is to spend time with him, and you're already not doing that, there is literally nothing to lose and no risk involved that I can see. Well, what if I initiate a new message and what if he really is not interested at all... I’m just afraid it can make things awkward the next time I see him again. I know this sounds weird, but I just don’t want him to avoid me if he things I’m becoming needy or clingy to him... He has not initiated any new texts anymore
introverted1 Posted September 22, 2018 Posted September 22, 2018 So is he significantly senior to you in position? That is the vibe I get - that he's engaging in some harmless, intentionless flirtation with someone in an administrative role at a company he's trying to land an account for. Assuming he is handsome and professionally accomplished, I'm going to say that he probably knows how to ask a woman out and, if he's not doing that, then fun flirtation is likely all he has in mind. 3
JuneL Posted September 22, 2018 Posted September 22, 2018 If he’s trying to land a project with your firm, I don’t see why he would be so unprofessional as to hit on you or ask you out. It might be a different story if he has already landed the project and established a good working relationship with your firm. Please don’t make a fool of yourself by asking him out. What would your boss think if he knows you’re hitting on his potential client. Like I said, your texts are borderline inappropriate from both of your ends. Are you much younger? Maybe he saw those texts as some bantering like how he jokes around with his daughter’s friends. 1
spiderowl Posted September 23, 2018 Posted September 23, 2018 I would find out if he's single first before contemplating anything else.
Author lovelymay Posted September 23, 2018 Author Posted September 23, 2018 If he’s trying to land a project with your firm, I don’t see why he would be so unprofessional as to hit on you or ask you out. It might be a different story if he has already landed the project and established a good working relationship with your firm. Please don’t make a fool of yourself by asking him out. What would your boss think if he knows you’re hitting on his potential client. Like I said, your texts are borderline inappropriate from both of your ends. Are you much younger? Maybe he saw those texts as some bantering like how he jokes around with his daughter’s friends. We’re the same age but you’re right I shouldn’t make a fool of myself with chasing him. I just think he’s super atttactive There are no collaborations yet and yes maybe he just wanted to flirt and nothing else.
Versacehottie Posted September 23, 2018 Posted September 23, 2018 So is he significantly senior to you in position? That is the vibe I get - that he's engaging in some harmless, intentionless flirtation with someone in an administrative role at a company he's trying to land an account for. Assuming he is handsome and professionally accomplished, I'm going to say that he probably knows how to ask a woman out and, if he's not doing that, then fun flirtation is likely all he has in mind. Are you sure he is single? Anyway I agree he has multiple motives. First, business; second, ego; third, fun flirtation and/or planting seeds for the future. Do it back. You never know what the future holds. Do NOT get hung up on him (dangerously close now) good luck
Author lovelymay Posted September 23, 2018 Author Posted September 23, 2018 Are you sure he is single? Anyway I agree he has multiple motives. First, business; second, ego; third, fun flirtation and/or planting seeds for the future. Do it back. You never know what the future holds. Do NOT get hung up on him (dangerously close now) good luck No I’m not sure but his colleagues think he is. LOL how do men plant seeds for the future???
stillafool Posted September 23, 2018 Posted September 23, 2018 No I’m not sure but his colleagues think he is. LOL how do men plant seeds for the future??? By leading you on so when their options run low they can circle back to you. It is unprofessional for you to go after him. Your boss may not appreciate it. If this guy is free and interested he will ask you for a date. 1
Versacehottie Posted September 24, 2018 Posted September 24, 2018 No I’m not sure but his colleagues think he is. LOL how do men plant seeds for the future??? The same way we do. They flirt just enough but don't take action necessarily. I don't agree (sorry stillafool) that is to lead a person on. I do think it's a timing thing or it is a "seed" because they will reap it when they are in that place to date you (maybe never because other things in life, other people get in the way). Also for an ego boost or for flirting for sake of flirting. All of which girls do as well. So they plant a seed for the potential of an opportunity which they may or may not ever cash in on. This is a phenomena that occurs in all parts of life not just dating.
Author lovelymay Posted October 4, 2018 Author Posted October 4, 2018 UPDATE After letting him go we haven’t spoken for a few weeks. A few days ago he asked me out for a drink So I’ll keep you posted about that. 1
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