I'veseenbetterlol Posted September 21, 2018 Posted September 21, 2018 (edited) Yet you went to bed with a man you barley knew anything about. I always say, watch what people do, ignore what they say. When you make statements telling a man that you want something serious, then you end up in bed, it communicates a lack of boundaries, no self control, and that you are not to be taken seriously. He also did the same. He told you that he was not into hooking up...yet you hooked up. Both of you demonstrated that your words mean nothing. The phrase 'putting the cart before the horse' sums up today's dating culture perfectly. Reminds me of this woman that asked me for my phone number before my name... You gave yourself up to soon and showed that you were willing to settle for a hookup. Some guys say they want something serious to get you bed and disappear the moment they get sex or when they see they aren't getting that easily. No guy looking for a relationship will sleep w/you on the 1st couple of dates. If you want a relationship, hold off on sex until you get more serious. Edited September 21, 2018 by I'veseenbetterlol
I'veseenbetterlol Posted September 21, 2018 Posted September 21, 2018 After our movie i went to his place and we had sex,everything was very natural, he was stunned about the sex and he said i was so good, and he even got dizzy after because he claims the sex was so good, a lot of kissing and we were both sober. Things got a bit complicated as he knows i want something serious and he told me about his life plans, that he might not be in the same place as i am in 3 years time, and he got really anxious and said he got hurted really badly before and the next girl he commits would be the one he marries or he can't bear with the pain. I said i did not know u don't wanna date, and he said he wants to, sometimes he say if you're my girlfriend... i would.. (examples) He said maybe he's not the one for me, we had this conversation half drunk and both were really tired to even continue we both fell asleep cuddling and he said to continue the talk tomorrow, in the morning we did not mention about it but i realise him being a bit distant, i asked why and he said ' you'll say i am over affectionate again, as he always likes to kiss and hug me in public. . To add to my answer: These kind of lines are complete BS. He is ghosting you and at the same time trying to make you feel sorry for him. I've had this done to me quite a few times and now I know that is just a bunch of horse crap. When I broke up w/my ex, I was upset for quite a while. During that time I didn't go on any dates due to the hurt. When it came time to open up again, I did. Even after getting hurt several times, I still opened up to my me. If you were that amazing, he would snatch you up, I can guarantee he would, he just doesn't find you all that great.
Author fooloflurve Posted September 21, 2018 Author Posted September 21, 2018 To add to my answer: These kind of lines are complete BS. He is ghosting you and at the same time trying to make you feel sorry for him. I've had this done to me quite a few times and now I know that is just a bunch of horse crap. When I broke up w/my ex' date=' I was upset for quite a while. During that time I didn't go on any dates due to the hurt. When it came time to open up again, I did. Even after getting hurt several times, I still opened up to my me. If you were that amazing, he would snatch you up, I can guarantee he would, he just doesn't find you all that great.[/quote'] Yeah, i think all those replies add up now, i was naively thinking oh well he is hurt ill give him time and from all those slow down texts and the lines he told me it all just looks too flaky.. i wish i would have knew and i dont think it makes much difference if i did not have sex with him because if i did not he would still have moved on to someone else because i was too difficult, anyway now i do understand i cant really change his point of how he sees me because i thought he was serious with all those lines. what a stupid experience.
Author fooloflurve Posted September 21, 2018 Author Posted September 21, 2018 You do know guys will go to great lengths and put on an amazing show to get laid with no intention of a lasting relationship, right? It's not like if they don't get it after 20 minutes of meeting they just bail. Guys aren't going to be slimy all the time and crude when they are looking to get laid. They will take you on dates, spend time, spend money, compliment you...for however long it takes. Then sleep with you and ghost you. It almost sounds like you think if they invest any time in you and say nice things, they are automatically NOT looking to get laid. Let me ask you, if I was looking to just get laid what would be my best route? 1. Tell you I am looking to get laid, act slimy and push you to sleep with me. 2. Spend a few dates, have nice conversations and compliment you. There's about a .03% chance of getting laid by spending no time and making no real effort with a woman. There is a much better chance of getting laid if you actually act like a decent person and fake interest and spend time. The end result is the same, he is just using a more successful tactic to get laid. i get what you mean. He was basically just looking to get laid even if i dont have sex with him he would have still moved on to someone else who is much easier, i guess i've learnt from this and i've see thru fake bull**** and what extend a guy would go just to get laid.. hate to say i felt quite crushed.
ChatroomHero Posted September 23, 2018 Posted September 23, 2018 i get what you mean. He was basically just looking to get laid even if i dont have sex with him he would have still moved on to someone else who is much easier, i guess i've learnt from this and i've see thru fake bull**** and what extend a guy would go just to get laid.. hate to say i felt quite crushed. It sucks, I'm sorry it went bad for you, but it happens. You can't always predict it either . Judge them on their actions and give it time to actually get to know them before you put too much trust in anyone. Their actions over time will paint a more accurate picture. Actions in a short time can't really be judged accurately.
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