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Contemplating a slow fade

Thingsfallapart

By Thingsfallapart
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SteadyPace Member

SteadyPace

Posted
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My guess is that he would be doing it passive-aggressively in order to get a reaction from her.

 

Perhaps you’re right..it’s just an action I’ll never understand and it’s so common..

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Thingsfallapart Established Member

Thingsfallapart

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Last night we talked it over and fixed it.

 

I asked her if she would marry me, she said she would if I went to Italy to propose.

 

So I’m catching a flight to Naples, Italy today.

 

Very happy!

 

Thanks for the advice everyone

hippychick3 Established Member

hippychick3

Posted
Posted
Last night we talked it over and fixed it.

 

I asked her if she would marry me, she said she would if I went to Italy to propose.

 

So I’m catching a flight to Naples, Italy today.

 

Very happy!

 

Thanks for the advice everyone

 

Good plan...marriage fixes everything! :rolleyes:

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MidwestUSA Established Member

MidwestUSA

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Good plan...marriage fixes everything! :rolleyes:

 

And what would reinforce that marriage? (For good measure, you know?)

 

A baby! Conceived in Italy. :rolleyes:

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I'veseenbetterlol Established Member

I'veseenbetterlol

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You've been with this girl for a year now, you owe her more than a slow fade. Maybe you are right and she is selfish and not a great partner, and if you don't want to be with her, then by all means, end things. Slowly fading just isn't the right way to go about it.

 

I recommend not ruining her trip for her. Since she doesn't talk to you much on her trip anyway, go ahead and keep doing what you are doing. When she comes home, that's when you break the news to her. Let the girl at least enjoy her trip and then give her the respect a person deserves by breaking things off with her in person.

 

For future reference, do not get with a girl that cheated on her ex with you. You'll never trust her.

 

This is very true! Slow fading is a really immature way of handling things. I dated a psycho for a month and just broke it off w/him. Be the bigger person and break it off, plus you learn how to act for future relationships.

ExpatInItaly Established Member

ExpatInItaly

Posted
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Good plan...marriage fixes everything! :rolleyes:

 

Right...sounds like a well thought-out, solid plan.

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Thingsfallapart Established Member

Thingsfallapart

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Life is like a Hollywood movie... Everything’s going to be just fine...

d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
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Last night we talked it over and fixed it.

 

I asked her if she would marry me, she said she would if I went to Italy to propose.

 

So I’m catching a flight to Naples, Italy today.

 

Very happy!

 

Thanks for the advice everyone

 

 

That is the worst plan ever! You are not mature enough to handle marriage. Nothing is going to be fine. Now you a just wasting money which will create more resentment. Do you really think she's going to text you all day now that you are her FI?

 

If you two even make it down the aisle, I don't give this marriage 5 years.

BaileyB Established Member

BaileyB

Posted
Posted
Last night we talked it over and fixed it.

 

I asked her if she would marry me, she said she would if I went to Italy to propose.

 

So I’m catching a flight to Naples, Italy today.

 

Very happy!

 

Thanks for the advice everyone

 

For real? Thats the silliest thing I've read in this board for a long time...

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Thingsfallapart Established Member

Thingsfallapart

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Donnie,

 

This would be my 3rd marriage...

needless to say I know a thing or two about marriage...

 

I’m at the airport and about to board.

 

Wish me luck everyone!

 

Love finds a way.

BaileyB Established Member

BaileyB

Posted
Posted

 

This would be my 3rd marriage...

needless to say I know a thing or two about marriage...

 

Love finds a way.

 

Needless to say, you have not been very successful in marriage, have poor judgment in partners, and make poor decisions... Love didn't find a way the first two times...

 

But, what the heck - maybe the third time is a charm! ;)

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d0nnivain Established Member

d0nnivain

Posted
Posted
Donnie,

 

This would be my 3rd marriage...

needless to say I know a thing or two about marriage...

 

I’m at the airport and about to board.

 

Wish me luck everyone!

 

Love finds a way.

 

Your 3rd marriage? But she's college student & you are hung up about the pace of her texting & didn't you could survive 1 month apart. Not the hallmark of mature compromise. You may have been married before but you clearly don't know much about marriage. It should not be entered into lightly & it's not disposable.

 

This is such a foolhardy plan. At least have a long engagement -- more then a year -- and get some real premarital counseling.

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PRW Established Member

PRW

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That is the worst plan ever! You are not mature enough to handle marriage. Nothing is going to be fine. Now you a just wasting money which will create more resentment. Do you really think she's going to text you all day now that you are her FI?

 

If you two even make it down the aisle, I don't give this marriage 5 years.

 

 

You're so optimistic.

 

 

I give it a week to a month.

 

 

In fact, I'm not sure they will make it through the marriage ceremony.

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kendahke Established Member

kendahke

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My guess is that he would be doing it passive-aggressively in order to get a reaction from her.

 

^^^This. All. Day. Long

Versacehottie Established Member

Versacehottie

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Your 3rd marriage? But she's college student & you are hung up about the pace of her texting & didn't you could survive 1 month apart. Not the hallmark of mature compromise. You may have been married before but you clearly don't know much about marriage. It should not be entered into lightly & it's not disposable.

 

This is such a foolhardy plan. At least have a long engagement -- more then a year -- and get some real premarital counseling.

 

Should I point out that less than 72 hours ago you were ready to break up with her WITH A LAME SLOW FADE like you had absolutely no maturity, a lack of communication skills and no much of a future. I hsrdky think things are better bc she accepted your phone call and you leot from that to marriage.

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Normm Established Member

Normm

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You were going to do a "slow fade" because you felt you weren't a priority in the relationship, and now, only days later you're flying to Italy to marry her.

 

 

Yeah this one's going to work.

 

 

Until he doesn't get enough attention on the honeymoon.

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PRW Established Member

PRW

Posted
Posted
You were going to do a "slow fade" because you felt you weren't a priority in the relationship, and now, only days later you're flying to Italy to marry her.

 

Yeah this one's going to work.

 

Until he doesn't get enough attention on the honeymoon.

Strange thing is she agreed to it. That doesn't speak well for her either.

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Normm Established Member

Normm

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Strange thing is she agreed to it. That doesn't speak well for her either.

 

She probably has no clue about his level of ..um..emotional turmoil.

JuneL Established Member

JuneL

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Actually this thread and other threads by another poster give me a glimpse to the mindset of those who have married N times: They make such decisions impulsively and when red flags are flying all over the sky.

Normm Established Member

Normm

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Actually this thread and other threads by another poster give me a glimpse to the mindset of those who have married N times: They make such decisions impulsively and when red flags are flying all over the sky.

 

Someone’s got to put divorce attorneys kids through Ivy League schools.

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kendahke Established Member

kendahke

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Life is like a Hollywood movie... Everything’s going to be just fine...

 

until the sequel hits and it bombs

  • Like 1
kendahke Established Member

kendahke

Posted
Posted (edited)
This would be my 3rd marriage...

needless to say I know a thing or two about marriage...

 

 

Ummm... clearly you don't if you've got two ex wives.

Edited by kendahke
  • Like 1
Normm Established Member

Normm

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Posted
This would be my 3rd marriage...

needless to say I know a thing or two about marriage...

 

 

That's like the guy who has had 3 car accidents saying he knows a thing or two about driving.

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guest569 Established Member

guest569

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I feel like you're just pulling our leg. Pretty sad really..

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Normm Established Member

Normm

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I feel like you're just pulling our leg. Pretty sad really..

 

 

Then there's this.

 

 

 

:p

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