When your girlfriend says I love you

[Frank88]

Women on an unconscious level are attracted to men who are a challenge. Part of that means a guy who does not reveal the full extent of his feelings and interest level.

 

My rule is when I'm dating a woman I wait until she says I love you first. The later a man says I love you the better. Even when she says I love you I do not parrot her in my response by saying I love you too. That ruins challenge and is predictable and boring and gets old fast.

 

So for guys the next time your girlfriend says I love you then you can respond with "Thank you" or "I appreciate that you think so highly of me" or "I'm a very lucky man". You can also compliment her. It is bad to give a woman too many compliments so you can save the compliments as responses to her saying I love you. You can say "I really enjoy our time together" or "You did a fantastic job on that dish you cooked".

 

You can also respond by setting up a date saying "I'd like to take you out to your favorite restaurant on X day".

 

Maybe once you can ask "Tell me what you love about me". Or if you want to respond with humor say "Be careful saying that because I think Arnold Schwarzeneggar would be insanely jealous".

 

There's some variety of responses. Ideally I don't want my girlfriend to talk all mushy because I may run out of responses. I will say I love you only on special occasions like her birthday, Christmas, when she is sick or in the hospital or some tragedy has happened in her life, etc. If we are getting married I will say I love you once on the wedding day and once during the honeymoon. During the honeymoon is a good time to tell her that ever since the day I first met her I always knew internally that I wanted her to be my wife.

 

This honeymoon is an appropriate time for a man to get somewhat mushy and verbally reveal the true extent of his feelings for her.

Edited September 4, 2018 by Frank88

[Lotsgoingon]

Dude, don't show this note to anyone you intend to date.

 

I think a guy can say I love you .... when he feels like saying I love you.

[Gretchen12]

Oh... Frank... you've got rough road ahead of you in relationships.

[BaileyB]

Oh... Frank... you've got rough road ahead of you in relationships.

 

Agreed.

 

To quote one of my favorite Beatles songs, "The love you take, is equal to the love you make..."

[Mrin]

Oh man. No. Just no.

[Frank88]

What the hell is wrong with people on loveshack? You all have no sense of humor. I don't see any point in dating if I can't find any humor in the situation. Don't you already have enough going on in your lives to be serious about as it is?

 

Most women find Arnold Schwarzeneggar to be a sexy catch so I figure bring him up in conversation with the girlfriend and say I don't think Arnold would like you saying I love you to me.

 

I guess anyone who is looking for comedy in their dating life is on the wrong site.

 

Believe me there's plenty of time to be serious in a relationship like when you are married and doing financial planning and discussing the house projects and stuff. That's boring enough as it is but a necessary thing to talk about. Why not take advantage of opportunities to joke around? The fun and games is partof dating too.

Edited September 4, 2018 by Frank88

[Lotsgoingon]

What the hell is wrong with people on loveshack? You all have no sense of humor. I don't see any point in dating if I can't find any humor in the situation. Don't you already have enough going on in your lives to be serious about as it is?

 

Most women find Arnold Schwarzeneggar to be a sexy catch so I figure bring him up in conversation with the girlfriend and say I don't think Arnold would like you saying I love you to me.

 

I guess anyone who is looking for comedy in their dating life is on the wrong site.

 

Believe me there's plenty of time to be serious in a relationship like when you are married and doing financial planning and discussing the house projects and stuff. That's boring enough as it is but a necessary thing to talk about. Why not take advantage of opportunities to joke around? The fun and games is partof dating too.

 

Dude, I love to laugh. I search out laughs. Look for laughs. I make up laughs.

 

I didn't see in your post what was supposed to be funny. A lot your post seemed to be about making women defensive and insecure. No--I don't find that to be funny.

 

Goofy dates, dumb s@@t I and other people have done on dates ... badly misreading someone's interest ... Lots of even painful relationships can be funny in retrospect.

 

I didn't see anything in your post that was funny. But I may have missed the cues.

[Frank88]

Dude, I love to laugh. I search out laughs. Look for laughs. I make up laughs.

 

I didn't see in your post what was supposed to be funny. A lot your post seemed to be about making women defensive and insecure. No--I don't find that to be funny.

 

Goofy dates, dumb s@@t I and other people have done on dates ... badly misreading someone's interest ... Lots of even painful relationships can be funny in retrospect.

 

I didn't see anything in your post that was funny. But I may have missed the cues.

 

 

So if a man doesn't act like a parrot and say I love you back when his girlfriend says I love you that makes her feel insecure and defensive? Well it is all in the interpretation. That says more about her than him. Matter of fact that shows possessiveness and that she is already insecure with herself. She should be secure in herself enough to know that a guy can show his love through his actions without having to verbally say it back.

 

There is no unspoken rule that says he has to say I love you back just because she says it. If she thinks otherwise then she is controlling and I would be better off without her. But hey if you don't mind a posessive girlfriend like that then sure by all means what I'm saying to you sounds foolish.

 

If a woman wants to get mushy with me that's fine. I don't tell her what to say and when to say it and I would expect the same treatment from her. Don't expect me to get mushy back just because you are.

Edited September 4, 2018 by Frank88

[BaileyB]

Dude, I love to laugh. I search out laughs. Look for laughs. I make up laughs.

 

I didn't see in your post what was supposed to be funny. A lot your post seemed to be about making women defensive and insecure. No--I don't find that to be funny.

 

Goofy dates, dumb s@@t I and other people have done on dates ... badly misreading someone's interest ... Lots of even painful relationships can be funny in retrospect.

 

I didn't see anything in your post that was funny. But I may have missed the cues.

 

If you missed the cues, then so did I...

 

My boyfriend makes me laugh everyday. If he did as you said in your post, he would not be my boyfriend. (That’s sarcasm).

 

No, I didn’t see any humour in your post. If anything, the words I would use are condescending and disrespectful.

Edited September 4, 2018 by BaileyB

[Frank88]

If you missed the cues, then so did I...

 

My boyfriend makes me laugh everyday. If he did as you said in your post, he would not be my boyfriend. I didn’t see any humour in your post. If anything, the words I would use are condescending and disrespectful.

 

There's nothing condescending about bringing up how Arnold Schwarzeneggar would feel. I think it is disrespectful that I would be expected to act like a parrot. If I don't say I love you back then it is up to her to make me feel it strong enough if she wants me to say it.

 

You did not give specifics. Saying I am a lucky man is not disrespectful. It is acknowledging reality.

 

But thank you. If I don't want a boring marriage life then I know not to listen to someone like you. There are only 2 possible outcomes to dating.

 

1. Break up

 

Or worse

 

2. Get married

 

By the way I find it interesting nobody takes into consideration that maybe just maybe a woman's mushy talk has thepossibility of attacking a man's comfort level. That I find to be disrespectful. There are 2 people in a relationship and the man's comfort level counts as much as the woman's comfort level.

Edited September 4, 2018 by Frank88