tuciarz Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 Hi. me and my ex were together for 2 years. I know her for about 8. we were always attracted to each other and had many greate times. we were living together for 10 month and everything was good but since we moved in together i started to neglecting her a little bit because i was running out of money and i was studying a lot to change my profession. we are 24 and 25 years old. we still had greate contact but i wasn't going out with her to much because i was a little bit overwhelmed with studying etc. of course i changed a little bit. i became a little bit boring and sometimes strenuous. she were getting more and more upset but i was promising her that if only i find job everything will change and i will have plenty of time for her. she also has problem with talking about problems and solving then. she broken up with me and then finally she told me about everything what was wrong in her opinion and she told me that she need space. i moved out to my good friend and for the first month i started to convincing her that we can fix everything because those are not things that cannot be fixed. she finally blocked me on facebook so i wasn't writing with her for 10 days. i cant's say i was begging her or crying in front of her. nothing like that. after this period i asked if she is still mad at me. she said no but she said i have to understand that she doesn't want to be with me anymore. I asked her out few times and we had really greate times. i wanted to show her that when i have job right now we can spend a lot of time together. once we kissed when i walked her home. we were a little bit drunk. 3 weeks ago i asked her out but she said she has plans for today and i asked if she is going somewhere with a guy which i thought he is attracted to her(i was wrong. there is nothing between them). she got super mad, she said she can do whatever she wants and its not my business and there is no possibility that we will be together again. after that situation i went NC and i don't talk with her for 3 weeks now. since that time she started to be very active on instagram. she posts a lot of pictures of herself from which some of them are a little bit erotic and some of them are pictures which i took when we once met fafter break up. she even posted weird quote about love. she went to the mountains with her parents to the place where we wanted go next month. we planned for this when we were together. 2-3 days ago she untagged herself from my photos. which punched me very heavily a lot when i found out. its not normal in her case to do all these things. she even changed her profile picture and background photo on facebook. im wondering if she is moving on by doing these thing or she wants to get my attention. the only thing i do is posting some pictures on instastory when im going out to let her know that im actually changing myself for better. she always see them. i know for sure that she is not dating anyone. she meets with her normal friends. is there something should do or can do? Thank you all for your thoughts and im very sorry for my english bot its not my native language.
PegNosePete Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 She has made it perfectly 100% crystal clear that she is NOT interested in reconciling your relationship. She has said it many times and her actions back it up. Why don't you believe her??
Author tuciarz Posted August 31, 2018 Author Posted August 31, 2018 because i think she is overreacting and i can see confirmation of it in her behaviour in social media. I want wait until her emotions will go down and then i want to try to start talk to her again.
ExpatInItaly Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 because i think she is overreacting and i can see confirmation of it in her behaviour in social media. I want wait until her emotions will go down and then i want to try to start talk to her again. No, you want to see it. You are viewing her online activity through a hopeful filter that she will come back, which is projection. There is no confirmation of anything. She has told you she doesn't want to reconcile. You need to listen to what she is actually telling you rather than interpreting unrelated behaviour to mean what you want it to mean. 1
Ralph79 Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 tuciarz, You are assuming a lot of things: im wondering if she is moving on by doing these thing or she wants to get my attention. She could just be changing profile pictures for the sake of ... changing profile pictures . Unfortunately , we tend to assume that everything our Ex's do after a breakup revolves around us. It doesn't. We just want to think it does because we want to believe that they are still thinking of us. the only thing i do is posting some pictures on instastory when im going out to let her know that im actually changing myself for better. she always see them. Are you 100% certain she sees them? Or do you want to think that. And if there is someway Instastory notifies you that she has seen them, who is to say that she didn't just open them to remove them from her notification queue. i know for sure that she is not dating anyone. Why are you so sure? . Please stop stalking this woman on social media. because i think she is overreacting and i can see confirmation of it in her behaviour in social media. I want wait until her emotions will go down and then i want to try to start talk to her again. This is the most arrogant assumption of them all. Dude, you messed up. You admit it. She got fed up with you. She doesn't want to have anything to do with you. And has said so countless times. What makes you think that this is an overreaction? The fact that you kissed her while drunk? In any case, you want help with advice on how to get her back. You didn't come here to post to be admonished. Here's what I would do: 1) Stop stalking her. 2) Stop posting about your life on Instastory 3) Focus on your career. Give her a chance to actually miss you. You said you went NC, but you constantly try to send her messages through Instastory and are always looking her up. Go NC for real. If the times were really as good as you think they were, then she will come looking for you. And if she doesn't , then you have to understand that she truly doesn't want to be with you, and you have no right to force her to change her mind. Why would you insist on being with someone that's constantly rejecting you anyways?
preraph Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 She is done with you. You need to move on and stop bothering her. No doubt she looked forward to that trip, so she decided to give it to herself. She's been crystal clear she's not going to ever be with you again. Respect that and move on. Sorry.
d0nnivain Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 You think she's emotional which you think is causing her to overreact. from what you described I see a rational woman who finally had enough & called it quits. You think whatever she told you was wrong with the relationship can be fixed. She disagrees & voted with her feet by showing you the door. Leave her be. You will be better served concentrating on your studies, healing your wounds & getting on with your life without her. Best wishes. 1
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