MissGuidedLove Posted August 27, 2018 Posted August 27, 2018 So, I shall make this brief. Have been in an on and off relationship for around 10 years, give or take. We have had numerous breaks, but only because he chose to leave me for another woman, when I was pregnant. I have a child from another relationship and we have a child together. We met very young, when my child was very young and of course, there were red flags, but I had never felt that way about anyone before, so I have been justifying everything since then. He is not physically abusive, but those words- do they cut deep? Ugly, fat, useless, look like a man, will never find anyone, noone will ever love you, end up being a single mom of two because you can't ever keep a man, embarrassing, said our kid wasn't his child, allowed his ex girlfriends to threaten our baby, cheated, etc. Havent heard a compliment in YEARS, no dates, rarely have any sex, spends 15+ hours with his friends smoking, using other drugs (yes hes an addict) and just hanging out with friends, never any time with me or the kids.. like, obviously there should have been tons of breaking points & I should have left, but what really happened, what was the end for me. He missed my kids first soccer game because he was with his friends and didn't care enough to come after my kid was beyond thrilled to have "his family" there for the first game. It sent me crazy and I just broke it off- like 100% over it and done. Told him I am done and he needs to take all of his **** out of my house. Of course, he hasn't taken his crap, but he did agree to leave and has only been back to shower once. My kid then proceeds to tell me he knows he uses drugs and has seen him and his friends use them and all he wants is for me to be with someone who treats me good and spends time with him . Really, I guess I just need some support to get through this. I can't do real NC because we have a kid, but I am just planning on ignoring anything not related to our kid. Is it normal to be this upset when you initiated the breakup? Is it normal to be hurt after you decided to leave? I know this is the right decision and I am not even regretting the decision, but I am very, very hurt... Crying all day, I am a damn hot mess, lol! Harsh truth and comments appreciated, no need to be gentle...
Ms. Jackson Posted August 28, 2018 Posted August 28, 2018 Ugly, fat, useless, look like a man, will never find anyone, noone will ever love you, end up being a single mom of two because you can't ever keep a man, embarrassing, said our kid wasn't his child, allowed his ex girlfriends to threaten our baby, cheated, etc. Havent heard a compliment in YEARS, no dates, rarely have any sex. Emotionally and psychologically abusive. This can do more damage and more long lasting than phisical abuse. spends 15+ hours with his friends smoking, using other drugs (yes hes an addict) and just hanging out with friends, never any time with me or the kids. Irresponsible. Towards you and the kids. He's just a big manbaby. Also, why would you want your kids to witness emotional abuse, people doing drugs, etc. ? Please tell him to come pack his stuff, or you do it yourself and just send it to his new address. Just speak to him only when it comes to the kids. My kid then proceeds to tell me he knows he uses drugs and has seen him Is it normal to be this upset when you initiated the breakup? Is it normal to be hurt after you decided to leave? I know this is the right decision and I am not even regretting the decision, but I am very, very hurt... Crying all day, I am a damn hot mess, lol! Harsh truth and comments appreciated, no need to be gentle... Yes, it can be normal, we grieve what we are used to, whether good or bad. You kid is right and you need to show them you can do better. Also, they will be happier with a good dad.
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