9Lives Posted September 6, 2005 Posted September 6, 2005 As some of you know. I have a mm in my life. We all love these men because they make us happy to a certain degree and for some reason..they seem like the right one. But as time goes on the situations become more complicated and confusing at times. It's the nature of the beast. So we decide not to let go...we want to take a break but not let go THIS IS MAY NOT BE THE RIGHT DECISION. My male friend recommended that you do better by breaking off the relationship and tell them you are moving on. I have found that it is the better decision. **It gives you your life back **It gives you time to really consider this relationship **It helps you see more clearly **Sometimes it helps him make a decision(one way or another) The other thing he told me was IF you let them come back to you...what has changed? If nothing has change then you are getting back on the rollercoaster. I am doing this right now. I love my mm but I think it is over now. He has asked me to wait, he loves me, and he wants to talk about it. I am not strong enough to talk. I am still deeply in love with him and I still need time to clear my head. BUT I WANTED TO TELL YOU LADIES OUT THERE THAT LETTING GO, IS NOT THE WORST THING IN THE WORLD. It actually is best. One way or another. Peace to you.
true26 Posted September 6, 2005 Posted September 6, 2005 I agree that for myself it has been the best decision to let go. For me though I had to get truly done with the situation for it to work. I tried NC several times and it never worked for me. Then this last time something just clicked and I am feeling less and less anxious by the day. Everyone needs to do it in their own time and when it feels right for them. I'm not saying that it is easy, but for me it is easier then the daily dissapointment of someone who is supposed to love me letting me down.
Author 9Lives Posted September 6, 2005 Author Posted September 6, 2005 The daily disappointment...it that the truth. We have never done NC and I am not going to do it now. I cant talk to him because I am not strong enough to handle anything he says. My heart is bleeding right now. I have alot of good times to hold on to and that is what I will keep. I am not doing the rollercoaster thing with him. The question I have is....How will I know if he is serious about our love?
true26 Posted September 6, 2005 Posted September 6, 2005 That's a good question. I think for me I live by the saying that "Actions speak louder than words". Not that I didn't believe my MM, but I don't believe that he loved me enough to leave his W for me. I loved him enough that I told my H about him and the seriousness of my relationship with him. His W still doesn't know about me. Now, that seriously hurt me. If you find you can avoid the rollercoaster, I applaud you. I made myself seem like such an a** because I got caught up in that and I started to think only with emotion and no logic. So, add humiliation to the list of things I felt.
Author 9Lives Posted September 6, 2005 Author Posted September 6, 2005 That's a good question. I think for me I live by the saying that "Actions speak louder than words". Not that I didn't believe my MM, but I don't believe that he loved me enough to leave his W for me. I loved him enough that I told my H about him and the seriousness of my relationship with him. His W still doesn't know about me. Now, that seriously hurt me. If you find you can avoid the rollercoaster, I applaud you. I made myself seem like such an a** because I got caught up in that and I started to think only with emotion and no logic. So, add humiliation to the list of things I felt. Same thing one of the men told me...ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAT WORDS. We will see. I am going to see what he does. **DELIVER THE GOODS or SHUT THE F/CK UP!**
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