Navybluegal Posted August 15, 2018 Posted August 15, 2018 (edited) Met a guy online, went on a coffee date with him. Pleasantly surprised as it rarely works out in real life that I feel attracted to a person. During the date I was watching his body language, and, while polite, he seemed a bit distant. Crossed leg, leaning back in his chair. Typically when someone is interested, they lean in, right? He also was the first one to call it a day, although I did mention to him that I was on a tight schedule that evening and had a few errands to run afterwards. At the end of the date, he said "nice meeting and let me know if you want to do it again". Although most everyone says something like that out of politeness, no? I would really like to meet him again, but not sure if he is into me. Should I just wait until he reaches out? I'm probably wayyy overthinking it but I've been out of dating game for a while and don't want to be a baboon and not pick up on obvious signs of disinterest, if those were there. Edited August 15, 2018 by Navybluegal
Angels_heart Posted August 15, 2018 Posted August 15, 2018 Met a guy online, went on a coffee date with him. Pleasantly surprised as it rarely works out in real life that I feel attracted to a person. During the date I was watching his body language, and, while polite, he seemed a bit distant. Crossed leg, leaning back in his chair. Typically when someone is interested, they lean in, right? He also was the first one to call it a day, although I did mention to him that I was on a tight schedule that evening and had a few errands to run afterwards. At the end of the date, he said "nice meeting and let me know if you want to do it again". Although most everyone says something like that out of politeness, no? I would really like to meet him again, but not sure if he is into me. Should I just wait until he reaches out? I'm probably wayyy overthinking it but I've been out of dating game for a while and don't want to be a baboon and not pick up on obvious signs of disinterest, if those were there. Hi Navybluegal don’t worry about overthinking, we all do that in these kinds of situations ;-) Quick question, did you guys meet to see if anything romantic could come out of it or just to see if you clicked in real life too as friends? How was your own body language at the time? It’s hard to tell if he was interested or not, depending on what kind of date it was and maybe his wasn’t sure yet which is why the signs you are looking weren’t there. But one thing I do know is that he reached out by saying “let me know if you want to do it again”, so basically he put the ball in your court and for whatever reason he said it – maybe because he was insecure himself, he made it be your decision if you guys should meet again. So if you still want to meet him again than I would say go for it. The ball is in your court :-) Good luck :-) Btw I wouldn’t read too much into it because he called it a day before you :-)
MaleIntuition Posted August 15, 2018 Posted August 15, 2018 I wouldn’t overanalyse body language, it can easily backfire. Arms crossed could in some cases mean that someone is trying to protect themselves - or they might simply be cold. Just ask him. Nothing to lose.
Scarlett.O'hara Posted August 15, 2018 Posted August 15, 2018 He said he was open to meeting again so take it as a good sign until proven otherwise. If he flakes or makes excuses not to meet up, then delete his number and move on. If you think he might have some potential, I think it is worth the risk.
iVisa Posted August 15, 2018 Posted August 15, 2018 I think he is shy. Some people need more time to relax ans just enjoy somebody company. Give him a time. He asked you to shedule next date if you want to, so just text him and ask about a meeting.
Author Navybluegal Posted August 15, 2018 Author Posted August 15, 2018 Thanks for replies - good to hear he might be just nervous. What should I say? I have no idea how to let him know that I'd like to see him again in a nonchalant way...
snowboy91 Posted August 15, 2018 Posted August 15, 2018 No need to read into body language. If you're interested just message him. Say something like "Good to see you the other day. Want to do coffee/lunch/<other activity> this weekend?"
maxi105 Posted August 15, 2018 Posted August 15, 2018 you ARE overthinking this, and again...to stop any further confusion!!!!! and games or worry. just text him and say you enjoyed his company, and would he like to meet up again next week. if you dont hear anything, then you will know youve tried. forget all the games and guessing what people might or might not do!!!!! and actually do what your heart is telling you it would like to do (meet him again). if you are not compatible, then another date might show that but at least you wont be wasting any more time on this situation!!!!!!, but then again, you might also get on even better than before and its all good fun and makes you feel comfortable. but unless you just get on with this then you wont know squat. how are you going to feel if you wait for him and he tells you ive met someone (and all because you were waiting for teh expected time to call back!!!!!) ok, my time is up too. good luck with the next message to him it could be good fun . see ya. maxi.
preraph Posted August 15, 2018 Posted August 15, 2018 Oh, don't tell him you like him. No need for that. He may have interpreted your actions as you were not interested-- or he may be lukewarm, can't tell. But he left the ball in your court, so you should text him and take him for ice cream or a scenic walk, and since you ask, you'll pay unless he absolutely insists. It might be that all you need to do is text him and say, Hey, what are you up to this week? And maybe he'll say, Not much, you want to get together? But if not, ask him if he'll go get ice cream with you. It's also possible of course that he was seeing if you were the kind of girl to sleep with him right away and decided you weren't, so don't let the next date be at your place or his and give him the wrong idea.
Recommended Posts