Jh23 Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 I have been with my girlfriend just over a year. She suffers from depression. Sometimes she is a lovely person but other times she is pretty harsh and nasty. We have been going through a rocky patch. Yesterday I was using her phone when I saw a message flash up criticising someone (obviously me). I shouldn't have looked but I viewed more messages where it was an exchange between my girlfriend and her friend. They were both properly being abusive towards me. My girlfriend said I hate the prick. He has man boobs and was pointing out my belly (I'm really not that fat). Her friend was saying similar things back and telling her to dump me. She says she is ashamed of the messages and did not mean them but I am so angry and hurt. This feels like a betrayal. I feel like kicking her to the kerb.
Larry56 Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 Do it. Dump her. So many people are using the "depression" excuse for treating other people like **** today. It's the millennial generation who does this constantly to excuse their bad behavior/upbringing. 1
Sunlight72 Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 She said, "I hate the prick", amongst other nasty comments about you? Well, no point I can see sticking around for more of that. Excuse yourself from the relationship. Sorry for you to find that sort of thing after a year, but don't be a sucker and make it two or three years. Best Wishes. 1
rightondude Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 get out. she was being honest. we are what we are when we don't think people are looking. 1
ExpatInItaly Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 Break up with her, OP. She has no respect for you and is rude and immature. Find a girl who actually likes you and appreciates you. Depression is no excuse for this behaviour.
FMW Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 I think you've seen behind the mask now. She doesn't sound like someone who is capable of being a "lovely person". Tell her you're done. Don't look back.
d0nnivain Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 At my most angry at a BF or my DH I never said things like "I hate the prick." I certainly didn't engage in body shaming. Yuck. You now know her true feelings about you & they are outright mean. Walk away.
OatsAndHall Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 That's ridiculously immature and rude behavior. There's a big difference between venting to a friend about a relationship and making personal attacks. It's time for her to go.
Malin889 Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 Wow, that’s a pretty mean thing to say to someone you are in a relationship with. “Hate”? There’s no question. If she hates you so much, then why is she sticking around?
Malin889 Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 And she was only “ashamed” of the messages because she got caught. She doesn’t sound like anyone you should be in a relationship with.
Author Jh23 Posted August 12, 2018 Author Posted August 12, 2018 Thanks for the replies. I love this girl but can't imagine putting the same stuff about her to one of my friends. She has really hurt me and although she has apologised she is now back to saying it is me who has turned her in to this nasty person. She says one thing to me and another behind my back. I feel so sad about the thought of breaking up with her but do I really want someone in my corner who talks about me like tuft and blames me for everything wrong in their life.
preraph Posted August 12, 2018 Posted August 12, 2018 Look I'm not one of those people who criticizes women for talking to their friends about their men, but what she said was harsh and hurtful. She had just generally said you were acting like a jerk or something, not a big deal, because a lot of it is just very, but I could never sleep with someone again who criticized body parts I can't do anything about. Might be wondering why they were with me and if it was to use me. So yeah I kind of think this is over don't you?
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