dr strangelove Posted September 2, 2005 Posted September 2, 2005 About a year ago I got so fed up with things between me and my ex I told her to get lost and stop contacting me. Now usually she doesnt listen, but in this case it was really over. Or so I thought...... I never ever expected to hear from her again. i became depressed. I had a chain of events happen after the break up that sent me deeper into depression, it made me question everything. Then one day she showed up on my msn. The butterflies in my stomach reappeared, something I hadnt felt from any other females I had met since her. When we did talk she was very angry. I dont think anyone here or me understands the whole scope of the situation, and I probably should at some point seek some counselling. In any case, in July she once again told me dont ever contact me again. etc etc.. which is odd cause before I emailed her she called me like 7 times and contacted me once via msn.. to which I never replied. Not the greatest way to improbe relations. In any case. I met someone down the street, that I helped fix up her apartment. We ended up hanging out alot, I began to get feelings. Even to this day, I could feel tiny sparks. But talking with her and seeing how she interacts and the type of person she really is I realize I become turned off. I guess I keeop giving it a try just in case. But it keeps me wishing for my ex. I know your susposed to live your life without regrets, but I can see the companion I lost. I find I have things I wish to share with someone, and none of these new women I have met dig that kind of stuff. And then I have everyman's (so-called dream) the attention lately of much younger women. Well the first one who was 10yrs younger turned out to be a complete flake. Then the one that was 16yrs younger .. well I think I was a notch in her belt. Now I sort of found one I dont mind too much which is 9 yrs younger, shes great to be friends with.. other that I can honestly say the feelings arent there. Plus she lives so far away. I think her attraction to me is mostly lust. However meeting this girl she pointed out many things I could still improve which I over looked. I now am developing an intense workout routine, which I find is much more of a workout then the gym. So am I happy to have the bed all to myself? To have the remote to myself.. watch movies i want to watch.. well.. I honestly miss having someone to share these things with. I miss her trying to sit next to me on a narrow chair.. oh well so what she was kindy needy, arent we all. Sure I wont contact her.. im the NC king. But in the back of my head I wonder if, the right words in the right order might make some progress. I guess ive made my own problems. Im the worst kind of man there is, the type I never wanted to be.
sanne Posted September 2, 2005 Posted September 2, 2005 You know I was talking to a few of my old buddies the other day about relationships and we came to a really startling conclusion. It's really hard to find someone that you can really connect with these days. Most people think it's easy as there are many fish in the sea, but when you really think about it is not that easy to just find someone. The best advice I can give you is to stop thinking about it so much and realize that finding the right person really does take time. Like they say, live as if each day is your last, and you won't have any regrets.
Author dr strangelove Posted September 2, 2005 Author Posted September 2, 2005 I do try to forget her and ot think about it. I talked to a buddy aboiut it last night.. he talked about him and his girl. He talked about her and him in increments. He sad six years ago he came to visit her and it didnt work out, then 4 yrs ago still wasnt working, then 2 yrs ago they got together and it did work, they are actually engaged. Ya it is hard to find someone. Feels at times like im gonna end up back with her somehow. Or maybe ill just be alone.
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