JMa27169 Posted July 12, 2018 Posted July 12, 2018 I have been dating my boyfriend for 7 months now and we are pretty serious. He is wonderful and I know loves me and would do anything for me to make me happy. However, I am bothered by something and was wondering if I am being way too over the top? Do guys and girls think the same? My issue: He goes to Flanagans with his male co worker every day for lunch. They sit up at the bar (faster service) and have been previously before we dated. I have been there with him a couple of times during lunch and or other times. I have brought it up to his attention that it bugs me, and I feel a bit jealous. He tells me many of the girls are bi/or are dating and he is not interested in them that they tell him how pretty I am and ask he he 'scored' ne type thing. He doesn't seem to think its a problem. But they go there every day and my mind cant help but wonder. I guess it all comes down to trust? I used to be able to go to lunch on my lunch break because I worked a decent distance but I am no longer. Is it something I need to just let go?
Gaeta Posted July 12, 2018 Posted July 12, 2018 I googled Flanagans and it says an Irish pub, what's the problem? Are the waitresses half naked? What is the issue? 3
Lotsgoingon Posted July 12, 2018 Posted July 12, 2018 So the girls, I assume, are the servers? Do they dress in skimpy outfits ... are they talkative and flirty? Lots of servers are friendly and the more they know you, flirty. But usually that's a meal-by-meal thing. They flirt when you're there. Patrons know not to take it seriously. So he has introduced you as his girlfriend to these women? ... That's good. I'm not sure what the problem is ... Maybe he talks to these servers differently than he talks to you? ... Say more.
Whodatdog Posted July 12, 2018 Posted July 12, 2018 Yes you need to let it go. He was going there before he started dating you. Nothing guys hate worse than some new girlfriend trying to tell them where they can and can not go. Just get over it. And get over your jealousy. Its not attractive.
d0nnivain Posted July 12, 2018 Posted July 12, 2018 Why do you think you are entitled to input about where he has lunch with work colleagues especially since that tradition existed long before you were in his life? It's totally something you have to let go of. If you don't he will let go of you. 1
kendahke Posted July 13, 2018 Posted July 13, 2018 of all the hills to die on, this isn't one of them 2
Calmandfocused Posted July 13, 2018 Posted July 13, 2018 Er, I’d be more concerned that he’s going drinking every lunchtime. What’s his employers think about that? Or is he just having food? Perhaps this is a cultural thing? I’m just very surprised as here in the uk, it would be impossible to get a drink, Order, get served and eat a meal in a pub within half an hour (standard lunch break), even if aforementioned pub was on your doorstep. Sounds a bit odd to me but not because of females being present 1
Woggle Posted July 14, 2018 Posted July 14, 2018 Maybe I looked up the wrong Flanagans but it looks like an Irish pub kind of restaurant. If he is hanging out there with a friend who is another man I don't see the issue.
act00 Posted July 14, 2018 Posted July 14, 2018 I honestly don't understand what your issue is...I'm lost. These guys go to lunch at a pub every day, and...what? Are you considering this lunch break party hour, happy hour, Friday night atmosphere with booze and boobs and seeking out nooner puder? Are you jealous your boyfriend plops a lot of money on restaurant food and maybe a bit of booze every day while you're in the lunch room with a sandwich you packed in a baggie and some apple slices? These guys go to the same places every day, and camaraderie and rapport builds up with the "regulars." The server or bartender may say "she's a keeper" or "she's hot" or ask, "did you score," or any banter. Have you ever worked in an environment of customer service where you encounter the same people on a regular basis? Banter is normal in this type of environment and you get to know people a little and develop rapport and get a little bit personal. It doesn't mean you want to jump their bones. I've had superficial discussions on how the dating scene is going with regulars. Is Flanagans a nudie bar? I would take issue with a nudie bar.
mortensorchid Posted July 14, 2018 Posted July 14, 2018 I read that a few times, and I don't understand why you are jealous. He goes to lunch at a bar in the middle of a workday with a guy coworker. Do they get hammered? It's just friend/guy time, guys like to have guy time just like girls like to have girl time.
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