ikonik Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 I recently connected with this girl for networking, but we talked on the phone the other day and she asked me what I was doing that night. We ended up at the same party (I told her I was going later) after I said I wasn't sure and I'd let her know if I hear of anything. I said hey to her and we chatted then went our separate ways. As I was leaving, she stared me down and said hey. On that same call she suggested we keep talking saying "let's keep talking." I've only known her for a few weeks so I don't know her that well but she's pretty outgoing and confident so maybe she asks that for everyone else too. I'm not sure if she's actually interested and I'm over analyzing. She's also pretty outgoing and confident, not sure if that changes anything.
smackie9 Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 She's chasing you. She asked you what you were doing, shows up at the same party, tells you that you should keep talking.....how much more do you need? Ask her to go hang out....keep it fun and casual. 1
d0nnivain Posted July 9, 2018 Posted July 9, 2018 There is some interest but because you met for networking you have to determine if she's interested professionally or personally. 1
Author ikonik Posted July 9, 2018 Author Posted July 9, 2018 So I suggested we meet for coffee to fill her in on some stuff. I guess that's not really asking her out but I'm still feeling her out.
preraph Posted July 14, 2018 Posted July 14, 2018 To me, it sounds like she's interested, but like others, I will caution you that there are people who will act however it takes if it benefits them professionally. People are ruthless in the workplace. I think it's within your rights next time she asks you to talk or whatever to ask her if her interest is personal or professional. Or just "Is this like a date or a business meeting?"
Author ikonik Posted July 14, 2018 Author Posted July 14, 2018 To me, it sounds like she's interested, but like others, I will caution you that there are people who will act however it takes if it benefits them professionally. People are ruthless in the workplace. I think it's within your rights next time she asks you to talk or whatever to ask her if her interest is personal or professional. Or just "Is this like a date or a business meeting?" That's true, but I really can't see what she would be getting out if it if she was doing that with me. If anything I should act that way with her since she's more well known and connected than me in our world. Also, why would she ask me what my plans were that night if she already had friends going to that party?
smackie9 Posted July 14, 2018 Posted July 14, 2018 Are you that insecure about yourself? That a woman just doesn’t really ever have a romantic interest in you? Is that why you are desperate to get several options? 1
Author ikonik Posted July 18, 2018 Author Posted July 18, 2018 So I suggested we grab coffee and she said yes enthusiastically, she's going on vacation for a few weeks but suggested reconnecting when she gets back. 1
smackie9 Posted July 18, 2018 Posted July 18, 2018 Oh no not that vacation thing again.....Say "call me when you get back". If she doesn't call/text it's a no go, don't push it. 1
Author ikonik Posted July 18, 2018 Author Posted July 18, 2018 Oh no not that vacation thing again.....Say "call me when you get back". If she doesn't call/text it's a no go, don't push it. She told me about the vacation before I asked for coffee.
smackie9 Posted July 18, 2018 Posted July 18, 2018 Maybe she will keep in contact when she's away....that would be a good sign!
mortensorchid Posted July 18, 2018 Posted July 18, 2018 Yes, if she keeps in contact while away that's a very good sign that she is interested. Is there a reason you can't meet for that coffee before she leaves?
Author ikonik Posted July 19, 2018 Author Posted July 19, 2018 Yes, if she keeps in contact while away that's a very good sign that she is interested. Is there a reason you can't meet for that coffee before she leaves? She leaves for vacation today. So all I asked was, “let’s grab coffee when you get back from vacation?” I asked her out yea? Just making sure.
rightondude Posted July 19, 2018 Posted July 19, 2018 damn dude yeah she's interested. She won't be if she sees you're this insecure about her being interested, though. 1
Author ikonik Posted July 29, 2018 Author Posted July 29, 2018 So I suggested we grab coffee and she said yes enthusiastically, she's going on vacation for a few weeks but suggested reconnecting when she gets back. Does this not count as asking her out? I said "let's grab coffee when you get back from vacation" apparently some people don't think that counts as asking her out?
ThreeRainbows Posted July 29, 2018 Posted July 29, 2018 Awesome that you worked up the nerve to ask her out. It's good to remember that the only thing you have to lose from asking a girl out directly, is nothing. It's just rejection - an emotion that passes - and it means nothing about you or your worth. 1
Author ikonik Posted July 29, 2018 Author Posted July 29, 2018 Awesome that you worked up the nerve to ask her out. It's good to remember that the only thing you have to lose from asking a girl out directly, is nothing. It's just rejection - an emotion that passes - and it means nothing about you or your worth. So I did ask her out with my original ask?
Author ikonik Posted August 8, 2018 Author Posted August 8, 2018 So she came back yesterday and I asked her today if she wanted to go for coffee. She said she’s swamped with work and didn’t suggest another time just that she’s swamped because she’s been gone for so long. Did I screw up by asking so soon after she got back?
alphamale Posted August 8, 2018 Posted August 8, 2018 So she came back yesterday and I asked her today if she wanted to go for coffee. She said she’s swamped with work and didn’t suggest another time just that she’s swamped because she’s been gone for so long. Did I screw up by asking so soon after she got back? no, it wasn't too soon. she's just not interested
Author ikonik Posted August 8, 2018 Author Posted August 8, 2018 no, it wasn't too soon. she's just not interested So did I read this situation entirely wrong? I thought she was interested
Author ikonik Posted August 14, 2018 Author Posted August 14, 2018 So I asked her out on Sunday and I haven't heard back yet. Last time we talked (last week) she said she was busy catching up on work. Should I follow up or chalk this up as she's not interested?
alphamale Posted August 14, 2018 Posted August 14, 2018 Should I follow up or chalk this up as she's not interested? she's not interested
Exformer Posted August 14, 2018 Posted August 14, 2018 So did I read this situation entirely wrong? I thought she was interested I think the blunder may have came from your uncertainty, and confidence issues. She was interested, to be sure, but interest diminishes without anything to keep that spark of interest alive. She hasn't responded to your last message, so I wouldn't send her another.
Author ikonik Posted August 14, 2018 Author Posted August 14, 2018 I think the blunder may have came from your uncertainty, and confidence issues. She was interested, to be sure, but interest diminishes without anything to keep that spark of interest alive. She hasn't responded to your last message, so I wouldn't send her another. I mean I did end up asking her out. It also didn't help she went on vacation for a few weeks. I think I might follow up since when I suggested before she left that we should meet up after she gets back, she said yes enthusiastically.
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