My girlfriends acts nothing like her parents, they are extremely controlling40-50y/o

[kendahke]

Because she doesn’t make enough she helps with the little bills at her parents house

 

Sounds like she's not ambitious enough to work a 2nd or 3rd job to attain what it is she wants since she doesn't make great money where she's working now.

[Greatly]

I didn’t say anything about pressuring her.

 

It’s simple. Just stop going over to the parent’s house to see her. She can go to your place.

 

But i like coming to get her ... i want her to drive over here sometimes because there are these times where she has to because I’m tight on gas. but for the most part i want to come get her i just don’t wanna deal with them when i come

[Greatly]

She should. She's grown and she's still living with them. She'd have to pay if she wasn't living there because adults have to provide for themselves.

 

Like I said, until your girlfriend decides she wants to be an adult and not their child, you're going to have to figure out how to deal with this.

 

Until then, if they're providing the roof, and she's willing to stay, she stays under their rules and yeah, they're going to use her car and she's going to pay to help out living there. That's the woman you chose to be with, so accept her or leave her alone.

 

But you're not going to force her from up under their roof if she doesn't want to leave and live elsewhere.

 

 

I think she should too, but she has decided to be an adult in my eyes and from the responses it’s my fault

[bathtub-row]

But i like coming to get her ... i want her to drive over here sometimes because there are these times where she has to because I’m tight on gas. but for the most part i want to come get her i just don’t wanna deal with them when i come

 

Well, as long as she lives with them, it’s a package deal.

[Greatly]

Sounds like she's not ambitious enough to work a 2nd or 3rd job to attain what it is she wants since she doesn't make great money where she's working now.

 

Well she is still in school ... i assumed i added that so she put the rest of her money in savings

[Greatly]

I didn’t read the part about him not getting out of the car. Regardless, the father’s behavior is over the top, from the way the OP is describing it. The bottom line is they’re far too controlling of their daughter and don’t give her any confidence to be independent. As a young, single woman, the very last thing she needs is the responsibility of owning a home.

 

I do agree with her parents about him not sleeping over at their house but not about her sleeping over at her bf’s. She’s too old to be bossed around this way.

 

Yeah her mom is nice. She is just scary her father is different which i expect just his reasonings for not wanting me with her is weird I’m 25 that’s not a huge age gap

[Greatly]

You're 25, right? That's something you should have been taught about 10 years ago by your father. Why didn't he?

 

My mother raised me alone

[d0nnivain]

My mother raised me alone

 

Then find an adult male figure you admire & ask him about your interactions with your GF's father.

 

As the son of a single mom, there appear to be some "man" lessons mom overlooked:

 

 

1. How to give a good handshake

 

 

2. Looking the dad in the eye

 

 

3. Walking up to the door to collect your date.

 

 

4. Do you know how to tie a regular tie & a bow tie?

 

 

 

You can make things better but you need to put in the effort.

[coolheadal]

Wow what a saga here... Come on now really? Parents are protective for their only daughter she's just 21 still not a full adult and here comes Mr. 25 who really wants things his way. Parents want you to slow your horses down and do what they say. You don't want that and the daughter has to obey her loving parents. You need to understand what type girl you have no matter how many times you have sex (I hope with protection) because if she got preg.. with you boy her parents will jump over her and then chase you down to man-up. This is what you got yourself into. Her, her parents and you... Life is hard but you got both parents watching your butt! You treat this 21 year old better than you have been with any other woman. Follow the parents rule when taking her out and bringing her back. These are the rules of her parents. These parents are not scary grow-up yourself and behave with them.

 

Gee-wiz why are you making this so hard for you and the 21 year old. She has to please you and please her parents. Do not push her, because the parents will come first. She knows them longer than you her been going out! Remember that.. You were raised by a single parent she been raised by both parents They love her and will protect her. Your mom did what she could and raised you.. But your not raised by both parents so you don's understand what her both parents are doing for their only daughter. So you need to chill-out and be a man your 4 years older you should understand things more clearer!

Edited June 29, 2018 by coolheadal

[Greatly]

Wow what a saga here... Come on now really? Parents are protective for their only daughter she's just 21 still not a full adult and here comes Mr. 25 who really wants things his way. Parents want you to slow your horses down and do what they say. You don't want that and the daughter has to obey her loving parents. You need to understand what type girl you have no matter how many times you have sex (I hope with protection) because if she got preg.. with you boy her parents will jump over her and then chase you down to man-up. This is what you got yourself into. Her, her parents and you... Life is hard but you got both parents watching your butt! You treat this 21 year old better than you have been with any other woman. Follow the parents rule when taking her out and bringing her back. These are the rules of her parents. These parents are not scary grow-up yourself and behave with them.

 

Gee-wiz why are you making this so hard for you and the 21 year old. She has to please you and please her parents. Do not push her, because the parents will come first. She knows them longer than you her been going out! Remember that.. You were raised by a single parent she been raised by both parents They love her and will protect her. Your mom did what she could and raised you.. But your not raised by both parents so you don's understand what her both parents are doing for their only daughter. So you need to chill-out and be a man your 4 years older you should understand things more clearer!

 

 

 

She isnÂ’t the only child and itÂ’s five other girls in her family (her siblings) and i do follow the rules i really like her. If she ever got pregnant IÂ’ll be there for her i love her i wouldnÂ’t dare leave her my dad left me and IÂ’ll never do that i know how it feels

[bathtub-row]

She isnÂ’t the only child and itÂ’s five other girls in her family (her siblings) and i do follow the rules i really like her. If she ever got pregnant IÂ’ll be there for her i love her i wouldnÂ’t dare leave her my dad left me and IÂ’ll never do that i know how it feels

 

If she ever gets pregnant, those controlling parents will become your kids’ grandparents. Just something to chew on.

[Greatly]

If she ever gets pregnant, those controlling parents will become your kids’ grandparents. Just something to chew on.

 

I mean that’s them, my gf doesn’t act like them ... I’ve been dealing with them fussing at me this long

[bathtub-row]

I mean that’s them, my gf doesn’t act like them ... I’ve been dealing with them fussing at me this long

 

I didn’t mean that your gf would be like them. I meant that your kids would have those people as their grandparents. How would you feel about dropping the kids off at the House of Radicals?

[Greatly]

I didn’t mean that your gf would be like them. I meant that your kids would have those people as their grandparents. How would you feel about dropping the kids off at the House of Radicals?

 

Of course not but i wouldn’t want to break up with her because of her parents I’m not dating them i love my gf