Author Nadine123 Posted June 23, 2018 Author Posted June 23, 2018 He did ask me why I was acting weird and distant a million times that day. I was just annoyed he decided to make a move the day before he goes home. I wish people here would stop attacking me and calling me nasty. There are people who hurt others and don't even think twice about it. I'm not like that, which is why I'm here. I didn't even think about it the way you guys are telling me about him really liking me. Thank you for your comments
Author Nadine123 Posted June 23, 2018 Author Posted June 23, 2018 Speak from the heart. mention things like how amazing he treated you during the trip, and you regret how you spoke to him last, explain what you were were feeling, etc. Just be open and honest. Thank you I'm going to do that right now. I'll post here about what he replies if he does. Thank you for all your feedback.
smackie9 Posted June 23, 2018 Posted June 23, 2018 (edited) Thank you I'm going to do that right now. I'll post here about what he replies if he does. Thank you for all your feedback. Best of luck! I think you both will feel much better after BTW no one thinks you are a nasty person. Edited June 23, 2018 by smackie9
Casio167 Posted June 23, 2018 Posted June 23, 2018 Hey Nadine, I think it’s clear from reading your posts that you said what you said out of feeling unsure and defensive, we’re all human and say things that we regret at times. I think it’s decent of you to get in contact with him now to try clear the air. I agree with what other posters said about speaking from the heart, acknowledge all the loveliness from the previous two months and explain why you said what you said. All might not be lost, and try not to beat yourself up over it too much, you’re trying to make things right now. Good luck! 1
Author Nadine123 Posted June 23, 2018 Author Posted June 23, 2018 Hey Nadine, I think it’s clear from reading your posts that you said what you said out of feeling unsure and defensive, we’re all human and say things that we regret at times. I think it’s decent of you to get in contact with him now to try clear the air. I agree with what other posters said about speaking from the heart, acknowledge all the loveliness from the previous two months and explain why you said what you said. All might not be lost, and try not to beat yourself up over it too much, you’re trying to make things right now. Good luck! Thank you for this. I just messaged him so I hope he replies back.
Veronica73 Posted June 23, 2018 Posted June 23, 2018 I don’t think anybody thinks you’re nasty. Your reply to him may have been unnceccesarily harsh (or maybe nasty depending on one’s perception)... but I doubt people here think you are nasty. As far as I’m concerned... you seem like a decent person. But I do think saying to someone that you have spent 2 months with, that having sex with them was a mistake and that it meant nothing to you would most likely be incredibly hurtful. Even though you didn’t mean it that way. 1
Author Nadine123 Posted June 24, 2018 Author Posted June 24, 2018 (edited) I messaged him a couple of hours ago and he read it but didn't reply. Is there anything else I can do or let it be Edited June 24, 2018 by Nadine123 More explaining
Gaeta Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 Nadine l beleive l was the one using the word nasty. I'm sorry it came across offensive. English isn't my native language and l could have searched a better suited word. I hope he replies and both of you find peace of mind.
kendahke Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 (edited) I messaged him a couple of hours ago and he read it but didn't reply. Is there anything else I can do or let it be I think you should leave him alone. You've done enough damage with your mean comments. Look at it this way: had he said to you what you said to him, would you want to have a pointless conversation with him at this point? Edited June 24, 2018 by kendahke 1
Author Nadine123 Posted June 24, 2018 Author Posted June 24, 2018 I think you should leave him alone. You've done enough damage with your mean comments. Look at it this way: had he said to you what you said to him, would you want to have a pointless conversation with him at this point? How is apologizing to someone having a pointless conversation? Most people wouldn't even care and yes, if it was the other way around I would be happy he apologized, not sure if I would want to reply back though which is why I understand he's ignoring me.
ExpatInItaly Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 I messaged him a couple of hours ago and he read it but didn't reply. Is there anything else I can do or let it be Let it be now. The ball is in his court as to whether he wants to reply. 2
kendahke Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 How is apologizing to someone having a pointless conversation? Most people wouldn't even care and yes, if it was the other way around I would be happy he apologized, not sure if I would want to reply back though which is why I understand he's ignoring me. It's pointless because he's not going to return your message. You've already told him exactly where he stands with you, so he got your message loud and clear and is acting like it. You can be sorry til times get better, but it won't unring that bell.
Author Nadine123 Posted June 24, 2018 Author Posted June 24, 2018 It's pointless because he's not going to return your message. You've already told him exactly where he stands with you, so he got your message loud and clear and is acting like it. You can be sorry til times get better, but it won't unring that bell. If you made a mistake and think that apologizing to people, even if they won't reply back, is pointless then good luck with that lol. I prefer to go with everyone else in the post who told me to apologize.
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 Eh I disagree with everyone. This is a perfect set-up for exit sex for him. Now he can use the excuse that you were "mean" never to talk to you again. Men and women think differently. Men are typically thicker skinned and those that are truly interested wouldn't let one comment like this drive them away forever. Especially when it's about "meaningless sex". They know most women take first time sex more seriously and OP was probably pretty emotional when she was saying those things. Now that OP has apologized and he is still not responding? Dude is looking for some real life action and CBF with correspondence. Nothing to do with him somehow being "deeply offended". 2
Author Nadine123 Posted June 24, 2018 Author Posted June 24, 2018 (edited) What's cbf? Now I'm annoyed that I said sorry because this is exactly what I thought from the start. Should I text him again telling him what a jerk he was. Edited June 24, 2018 by Nadine123 Help meee
2much4 Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 What's cbf? Now I'm annoyed that I said sorry because this is exactly what I thought from the start. Should I text him again telling him what a jerk he was. Oh no absolutely don't....you're gonna come across as a lunatic. Just leave it be. The player type really doesn't have the patience to be nice and respectful for two months. You wouldn't have seen him again for at least two years regardless if he made his move on the first or last day....so what's the big deal?
Lorenza Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 I don't understand what's the difference if he planned it out or not?? You're a consenting adult and you chose to sleep with him, well aware you're not gonna see him afterwards. If he's a jerk because he made his move on the last day, then what does it make you for accepting it? To me, it's absolutely crazy to blame him for anything. You say the sex didn't even mean much to you, so why didn't you just own it up the next morning and part your ways peacefully? 6
Lorenza Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 Men and women think differently. Men are typically thicker skinned and those that are truly interested wouldn't let one comment like this drive them away forever. Especially when it's about "meaningless sex". They know most women take first time sex more seriously and OP was probably pretty emotional when she was saying those things How about women taking responsibility for sparing their own feelings? We're not helpless sheep to leave it all to men and expect them to always be aware on how emotional we can be about this stuff. 6
Author Nadine123 Posted June 24, 2018 Author Posted June 24, 2018 OK good news he replied back with such a lovely message and were talking again. Thank you all for encouraging me to apologize I really appreciate it. 1
Casio167 Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 Ah i’m delighted for you, that’s lovely. Just on a side note to the folk that think he was just waitinf til the end to get hus bit...Really two months of graftwork and spending all your time with someone just for a ride at the end...I dont buy it. He seems to have genuinely liked you. Best of luck! 1
stillafool Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 How about women taking responsibility for sparing their own feelings? We're not helpless sheep to leave it all to men and expect them to always be aware on how emotional we can be about this stuff. ^^^^^This^^^^We need more of this! 1
stillafool Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 OK good news he replied back with such a lovely message and were talking again. Thank you all for encouraging me to apologize I really appreciate it. But you still meant what you said when you told him that the sex meant nothing to you, right? 1
Versacehottie Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 I don't understand what's the difference if he planned it out or not?? You're a consenting adult and you chose to sleep with him, well aware you're not gonna see him afterwards. If he's a jerk because he made his move on the last day, then what does it make you for accepting it? To me, it's absolutely crazy to blame him for anything. You say the sex didn't even mean much to you, so why didn't you just own it up the next morning and part your ways peacefully? I agree with this. And listen no reason to slam Lorenza who is giving you solid advice. That's why i said to craft your apology message you are flip flopping all over the place. You haven't really taken responsibility and are tending to see guys as the enemy. And then after you decide OP to apologize based on many people saying you were absolutely in the wrong, one person agrees that he had devious motives (respectfully disagree with ES) most likely and you flop again in a matter of minutes AFTER having sent the apology. Sorry i disagree that he had bad motives and you have to stop seeing guys as the enemy. He slept with you because you mutually agreed to. If you are having doubts about what you did, that's on you not blaming this guy for having evil motives. Jesus. Glad he accepted your apology and hope you see that this is just more evidence that he seems like a good guy and it's you that is all over the map and fickle AF. Get a grip seriously. and enjoy this nice person 2
Lorenza Posted June 24, 2018 Posted June 24, 2018 (edited) Glad he replied and it all worked out nicely, but you were regretting your apology and considering telling him what a jerk he was just couple of messages ago. Edited June 25, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 3
Author Nadine123 Posted June 24, 2018 Author Posted June 24, 2018 (edited) There's no where where I was victimizing myself or saying I didn't want to have sex lol. Edited June 25, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Recommended Posts