wiseman6716 Posted June 20, 2018 Posted June 20, 2018 Long Story short started talking to a past flame month or so back. Nothing serious just some texts and couple phone calls etc. Asked her to hang out and her response was she really needed to break things off with her bf before we started getting together. I responded I respect that. Wasn't sure at the time if she was insinuating that was her intentions or maybe someday if she splits then she would be up for it. I haven't heard from her since, debating if I push it or just write it off at this point. I won't be a possible a back up plan. If she doesn't feel its important now, then why I should be available possibly down the line. Just trying to feel out if I'm looking at this right.
d0nnivain Posted June 20, 2018 Posted June 20, 2018 Write it off. She's probably still with the BF or at least figuring out life post break up. 2
fredflint Posted June 20, 2018 Posted June 20, 2018 Long Story short started talking to a past flame month or so back. Nothing serious just some texts and couple phone calls etc. Asked her to hang out and her response was she really needed to break things off with her bf before we started getting together. I responded I respect that. Wasn't sure at the time if she was insinuating that was her intentions or maybe someday if she splits then she would be up for it. I haven't heard from her since, debating if I push it or just write it off at this point. I won't be a possible a back up plan. If she doesn't feel its important now, then why I should be available possibly down the line. Just trying to feel out if I'm looking at this right. You already told her what she wanted to know. That you *are* a possible back up plan. 1
Lotsgoingon Posted June 21, 2018 Posted June 21, 2018 If she was interested in you, she would have called you to say I am no longer talking to bf and I wanna see you. Nothing you can do ... You made your interest known. Now it's her time to respond ... Sounds like she's not ... Move on ... 2
Happy Lemming Posted June 21, 2018 Posted June 21, 2018 You are her "Justin Case" It is a term for guys that are there "just in case" a woman breaks up with her present boyfriend. My advice... write it off, be done with her altogether, go "no contact" and move forward with your life. 1
TheFinalWord Posted June 21, 2018 Posted June 21, 2018 Long Story short started talking to a past flame month or so back. Nothing serious just some texts and couple phone calls etc. Asked her to hang out and her response was she really needed to break things off with her bf before we started getting together. I responded I respect that. Wasn't sure at the time if she was insinuating that was her intentions or maybe someday if she splits then she would be up for it. I haven't heard from her since, debating if I push it or just write it off at this point. I won't be a possible a back up plan. If she doesn't feel its important now, then why I should be available possibly down the line. Just trying to feel out if I'm looking at this right. All you can say is "well if anything changes, give me a call!"...don't push it. High chance it was a BS excuse anyway. Gotta keep your dignity! 2
coolheadal Posted June 21, 2018 Posted June 21, 2018 Long Story short started talking to a past flame month or so back. Nothing serious just some texts and couple phone calls etc. Asked her to hang out and her response was she really needed to break things off with her bf before we started getting together. I responded I respect that. Wasn't sure at the time if she was insinuating that was her intentions or maybe someday if she splits then she would be up for it. I haven't heard from her since, debating if I push it or just write it off at this point. I won't be a possible a back up plan. If she doesn't feel its important now, then why I should be available possibly down the line. Just trying to feel out if I'm looking at this right. You already received an answer from her in text or cell call to you stating "she really needed to break things off with her bf before we started getting together." a cliff hanger statement. Maybe she does and maybe she doesn't. By-the-way old flame should be blown out! Why do you bother to keep it lit for a chance with her? 1
act00 Posted June 21, 2018 Posted June 21, 2018 It seems to me, she's caught a bit of the nostalgia bug...a little bit of missing the good times, the old flame. She's insecure with her current relationship. Maybe it's on the verge of breakup, or maybe it's just a rough patch. The reality is, she is still with him, and her goal was not necessarily to reconnect or hook up...or at least not outwardly consciously...subconsciously she's probably wishing she had what you two had as a couple...the good parts she's remembering, not the reasons you were incompatible and broke up. She's remembering the good feelings and you were once "it." She may be interested in trying again, but when? She's still with her guy...will they work it out? Will they remain on this bumpy road for months and weeks before they officially end it? Is she good relationship material after a major breakup? Is it a good idea to get involved with someone who's essentially "monkey branching" and rekindling long lost feelings? Just because an old flame contacts you, doesn't mean they're necessarily interested in rekindling an old flame. They did have a bond with you, though, and want to know how you're doing. The circumstances, if she DOES want to get together, are not great, and proceed slowly and cautiously if this is something you want, but really, but she can only be a friend right now...nothing more. 1
kendahke Posted June 21, 2018 Posted June 21, 2018 She's not emotionally done with him. No telling when she will be. I'd move on. 1
alphamale Posted June 21, 2018 Posted June 21, 2018 dude she's just stringing you along, go back into strict NC 1
carhill Posted June 21, 2018 Posted June 21, 2018 She knows how to find you. If she requests the pleasure of your company in person, see how you feel then. If the bla, bla starts up from her end, just respond 'let's get together and talk about it' with no further response.
smackie9 Posted June 21, 2018 Posted June 21, 2018 What would I do....write her off. My experience...you wait for no one.
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