llindvior Posted June 17, 2018 Posted June 17, 2018 I’m going to into as much details as possible. Intro According to MBTI test, I am an ENTJ, she is an INFP. You might be thinking why an ENTJ needs the opinion of others but I have been thinking literally too much. And it is affecting me so I have to finish this now. There’s this girl at work that I have absolutely no feelings for initially. Well I usually just don’t have feelings for a girl unless she starts approaching me actively for weeks and gets me used to having her around but at the same time nothing happens to make me disgust her during this period of time. She is easily the center of all male eyesight in any venue, even when those guys have a gal beside him. Even without makeup, she looks better than most girls with, makeup. A few months ago she broke up. She has a long queue of people waiting in line. (Yes she shows me the chat contents of those people and explains how irritating they are). Somehow I started to shine at work at this same period of time. Suddenly most girls at work start to notice me including her. Within 1-2 weeks, and out of nowhere she started to act jealous when I treat other girls better than her and she even admits it. She requested I reply each of her text messages. I didn’t usually do that because that’s how normal friends act right? Replying some and forgetting to reply some? As soon as I started to reply every single one of them, it was on, seriously. We were texting nonstop literally, for the whole day. After work she would inform me exacts which procedure she was in for her one-hour trip back home. She would show me her dinner, her new shoes, her sister’s photo. She would tell me she is going to gym, what time start and what time end. She will tell me she’s gonna bath now so she can’t read my messages and tell me when she’s done bathing. Then she would send me a selfie of her drying hair. Soon she was saying stuff like, “Why didn’t you say goodnight to me”. We started to text each other goodnight and evolved real quick into voice message goodnight. (iPhone chatting apps) Within another week that was not enough for her already. That’s how the late night phone calls started. As soon as that started, there was nothing else anymore at night. No more gaming, TV shows, nothing just phone calls until one of us falls asleep. She starts to ask me, “Do you miss me” a lot. Seriously I didn’t at first. But soon it has become a daily routine to find her that I feel something is missing unless I find her. Soon we were dating. We’ve started movie/dinner dates a lot. Maze Runner, Ready Player One, Avengers basically all the of recent big hits we were together. Soon I had 100% of her time. Basically everything was me. She even sent me a sketch showing her brain and I was a circle filling up 99% of the brain where as makeup, work, dinner, facial adds up to the other 1%. Physical contact increased rapidly in one month time. From a few inch distance, to no distance while walking. She starts to grab my hand once in a while. Then, accidentally touching her legs while sitting together didn't seem strange anymore. Accidentally coming in contact with her chest with my arms/elbow didn’t feel embarrassing anymore. I confessed to her within two months of all these stuff that happened, which I described above. Everything got only better after that. Then she started to go to my place. More and more frequently. We started holding hands. We started goodbye kisses. We started to hug. She doesn’t seem bothered to rest her legs on mine while wearing a short skirt. She can remove makeup in front of me. She starts to ask more questions like, “How much do you like me?” She starts to compliment, “Why are you so smart?” Or even more direct, “I want a hug/kiss now”. “Can I live with you” Then our last two dates. The first one, she slept with me at my home. I initially wanted to spare her but she removed her bra in front of me. The second one, I brought her to see my parents and we had dinner together. Then everything changed. She told me she was worried her ex has mental illness due to the breakup. She said that he can say he’s over with her and that it’s impossible to get back together one minute, and the other minute tell her he still loves her a lot. She wanted to take him to the doctor. Then her ex even said very mean and bad things to her. She was crying for days wondering why people can change so much. When her ex decided to leave our company she insisted to help him stay because the guy is just starting to develop a career here. Soon I was getting pushed farther and farther away until a point I felt like they were back together already. It was then, when I realized she was not just his girlfriend, but his fiancé already. But the schedule was two years later since they seem to have family problems. Long story short, the guy’s whole family doesn’t accept her. And it seems like she threw away everything between them except the engagement ring. It’s been a month. First week I had trouble accepting she’s gone in a blink of an eye. I had made compromises to my habits and tried to make improvements as a person even though I’m an ENTJ. Now I would not contact her in any form other than unavoidable work issues. She would still text me for random stuff once a day or two to make sure I didn’t block her I guess. Aftermath I am lucky I have the authority at work to decide if I want to be at office or not. I have gotten past that emotional explosion, rethinking what happened, and trying to accept phase. So I don’t need counseling. My question is, has she ever liked me? Or have I been played all along?
d0nnivain Posted June 17, 2018 Posted June 17, 2018 You threw a bunch of initials out there. I don't know what any of them mean. People are complicated & you can't stick them in little boxes based on some quiz or initials. Anyway, you were a rebound for her. That means that she both liked you & played you. She liked you enough to spend time with you but she liked him more. Sorry.
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