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Posted

Hi,

My name is John...I was married for 25 years and have 2 grown up girls who are both teachers and have their own homes....I divorced my ex in 2014...

Clean break order etc...

I moved on and met a really nice Zambian woman (never married...no children) and she moved in with me in April 2015

She shared my house and we married in June last year....since we married our relationship has gone downhill....we constantly argue...about every 6 weeks and she goes off to the spare room giving me the silent treatment...

we make up and then her lack of communication to me annoys me....and this loop of arguments goes on.....

she is in care work and thinks nothing of not contacting me all day to tell me she is working until 10pm instead of finishing at 3pm....works weekends without telling me....just gets up and goes out to work....

I thought basic simple communication was was needed in a relationship?

 

I have tried so many times to talk to her about her lack of communication....she never apologizes....and it just goes on....

so I have decided enough is enough as I am very convenient for her as she is doing a nursing course in later life.....she is 52 now and has a 3 year degree ahead....

 

she came into my life with no money....and I have paid for everything....holidays in Zambia...we have lived and shared a house for 4 years....We bought a new house with a 90K mortgage in both our names...

I put 145k into the purchase...

 

My question is ....if I divorce her...what is she entitled to? ....she works part time as she is at college and does indeed contributes to the house....I pay everything...all the bills are in my name...she transfer 520 a month to me....which helps...

Posted
Hi,

 

 

she came into my life with no money....and I have paid for everything....holidays in Zambia...we have lived and shared a house for 4 years....We bought a new house with a 90K mortgage in both our names...

I put 145k into the purchase...

 

My question is ....if I divorce her...what is she entitled to? ....she works part time as she is at college and does indeed contributes to the house....I pay everything...all the bills are in my name...she transfer 520 a month to me....which helps...

 

Where did you get married, where do you live now, and did you sign a prenup?

Posted

With all due respect, it would be in your financial best interest to talk to a lawyer. I’m sorry it hasn’t worked out for you. I don’t blame you at all for wanting to pull the plug... it sounds a little like she is taking advantage of you - financially, at least.

Posted
Where did you get married, where do you live now, and did you sign a prenup?

 

I'd also add what's her citizenship status? Could be a number of other agendas at work here...

 

Mr. Lucky

Posted

In general a spouse is entitled to half any assets or debts acquired during the course of the marriage. You were not married long, so it shouldn't be that big a chunk compared to your overall assets.

 

However, there are many adjustments and complications that can happen depending on your specific circumstances and you need a local lawyer to help you sort that out.

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Posted

My wife from Zambia came to the UK around 1988...

She has "Indefinite leave" status...

 

I was planning a holiday to Portugal.....But cannot book it until she finds out how long it will take for her to get a visa....the consulate is in Manchester. ..I write down the number and ask her to ring them last week...(last Monday)....I also email them for info...

On Wednesday night I ask her if she's phoned them....No she says.....how come I ask....Oh...not now. .I'll sort it..

 

On Thursday night....I'll ask her again if she's phoned....No she tells me....no explanation. ..just that one word...."No"

I go out in the garden for a couple of hours...

At 10pm that night I calmly ask her why she's not phoned all week about a travel visa...

"I filled in an on line application and have an appointment on the 6th July"

 

Why did you not tell me..I ask...?

 

Because you never gave me chance she says

 

I was seething...arghhh!

What is it with this woman?....where is the basic communication!!!!???

Posted

Most solicitors in the UK provide a free hours consultation. Book one and get some advice

Posted

She said no, she hadn't done it yet. You stalked off in a huff and she filled out the form. Then hours later you came back in to ask why she hadn't done it, and she told you that she just did.

 

Not sure why this merits "seething"?

Posted
I was planning a holiday to Portugal.....

 

Given the condition of the marriage and your dissatisfaction with it, what's a vacation together going to bring to the table?

 

Mr. Lucky

Posted
Most solicitors in the UK provide a free hours consultation. Book one and get some advice

Right!

 

And then book another, and another. Always get 3 quotes.

 

Don't waste the free hour talking about how unreasonable your wife is. If you've decided on divorce then just talk figures. That's all that's relevant. It doesn't matter what she did or said. All that matters is your respective incomes, assets, debts, life circumstances. This is a short marriage so most likely you'll both take outt heassets you came into the marriage with. Although, you might have to pay her some "go away money".

 

Even if you don't need a solicitor to handle the divorce for you, it's always helpful to get FREE advice from a professional! You will learn so much... about what NOT to accept as well as what to expect.

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