ExpatInItaly Posted June 1, 2018 Posted June 1, 2018 So what exactly is she going to be doing on this break to facilitate a major change of housing for herself? I'm sorry OP, but I think you're going to find this break is pointless. Unless she moves out, nothing will change. 1
CrazyKatLady Posted June 1, 2018 Posted June 1, 2018 If it was me, I would not let a man go through what you are. I would fade out of the pic and let him find someone who is able to date him the way he deserves.
Purrrfect Posted June 1, 2018 Posted June 1, 2018 Not only is her living with him unacceptable, but you mentioned a. Housing list. Why does she have no money? And is she trying to get on Sec 8? You don’t mind dating someone dependent on govt help?
coolheadal Posted June 2, 2018 Posted June 2, 2018 I've given her many opportunities to tell me if she isn't ready or if she wants to put this on hold. So far she hasn't What he is doing to the child is completely unacceptable. And I am more than aware of that I have absolutely minimal contact with the child seeing it maybe a few times a month max for that very reason! as far as the child's aware I am just a friend. Complicated you do not need this toxic lifestyle. It will never be what you want. She's using you as her escape from the toxic life she has now. Where would you fit in? Take a closer look at this picture. you her him and the child. She's not leaving him she's just trying out new things with you. She'll always be a mother and you will always be the second thought well in this case third one. "See the child knows you as a friend" They's your answer. Why not date a woman who has no baggage without child and ex. If he's really the ex?
preraph Posted June 2, 2018 Posted June 2, 2018 So I assume she isn't working? Because if she is paying for anything like a new bed, she's doing that instead of moving. Why can't she work if he's there half the time to watch the child? Get herself out of this mess. My biggest red flag with her is if she isn't working and is just planning on sponging off whatever man will take her in, because that is never going to be a happy situation.
kendahke Posted June 6, 2018 Posted June 6, 2018 She's monkey-branching and messy. She needs to clean up her situation and if that means that for the time being, she works a second job to amass the money to move out on her own and less time hanging out with you while not getting her living arrangement under control, then that's what she needs to be doing. Or she can go back to being with her boyfriend/baby-daddy that it's clear she's not emotionally done with. I've never slept in the same bed as any of my ex's while calling myself dating yet another guy at the same time. That's messy a.f. 1
kendahke Posted June 6, 2018 Posted June 6, 2018 Update we've decided that with her everything that's happening were going to go on a break, as its too difficult and if we carry on like this it's destined to fail! Anybody have any tips or good reading about breaks? There is no such thing as "a break". You've broken up. Anything that is neglected dies. You're now both free to do what you need to do to find individual happiness. She's got a whole lot of work to do--years of it most likely--before she's ready to be with someone new. Right now, she needs to be about the business of getting her own so she's never at the mercy of whomever for a place to lay her head at night. Don't squander your youth behind someone who is not who you need and isn't doing much about it but trying to find her next savior.
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