cheersbar Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 This coming Saturday I have a first date with this girl. She's not the cheesy type at all, which is important to this story. Last night I went out for drinks with a few buddies. I ended up getting a bit tipsy. The girl texted me about how she's a little nervous for Saturday. I ended up texting her saying "I'm not gonna lie I'm a bit nervous for Saturday " she asked "why" and I told her "well I've been wanting to go on a date with you, you're so cool and easy to talk to and you're absolutely beautuful. I just want it to go well" Then I texted her after that "I'm a bit tipsy so I don't know if it's me or the alcohol but I'm not cheesy I swear. That ain't me" She didn't reply to either text so I'm really hoping I didn't blow it or maybe come off to strong? Should I bring it up again about how it was a mistake I said that it just forget I even brought it up?
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 What's your definition of "cheesy?" And why is she "not cheesy?"
Author cheersbar Posted May 20, 2018 Author Posted May 20, 2018 She isn't a real romantic say sweet things type of gal which is fine. I'm not either
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 She isn't a real romantic say sweet things type of gal which is fine. I'm not either Well, I don't think what you said was over the top. Basically apologizing for saying it because you were drunk may have put her off, hard to say. She may also be confused, as I was, about what you meant by "cheesy." Did you mean it was cheesy to say you're nervous? She said that too, so maybe she took it as an insult? Gonna have to just wait this one out I think.
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 Also, what makes you think she's not a romantic/sweet talk kind of girl?
Author cheersbar Posted May 20, 2018 Author Posted May 20, 2018 Well, I don't think what you said was over the top. Basically apologizing for saying it because you were drunk may have put her off, hard to say. She may also be confused, as I was, about what you meant by "cheesy." Did you mean it was cheesy to say you're nervous? She said that too, so maybe she took it as an insult? Gonna have to just wait this one out I think. Just cheesy with the whole "You're beautiful and being nervous" part. I mean it makes me look insecure I think
carhill Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 You were honest (I presume) in your desire/want to date her. If that puts her off, then that's on her. Presuming she's not a tea-totaler with an aversion to people who consume alcohol, she knows that people get 'tipsy' and has likely been 'tipsy' herself. I'd leave it alone, confirm the date later in the week and prove your desire in person. Whatever happens, happens. If she flakes on you, that's also on her. Her choice.
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 Just cheesy with the whole "You're beautiful and being nervous" part. I mean it makes me look insecure I think Well, don't text her again about it and apologize for it. That would make you look even more insecure. 1
Author cheersbar Posted May 20, 2018 Author Posted May 20, 2018 Well, don't text her again about it and apologize for it. That would make you look even more insecure. Maybe i'm making a bigger deal out of it then I should
coolheadal Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 This coming Saturday I have a first date with this girl. She's not the cheesy type at all, which is important to this story. Last night I went out for drinks with a few buddies. I ended up getting a bit tipsy. The girl texted me about how she's a little nervous for Saturday. I ended up texting her saying "I'm not gonna lie I'm a bit nervous for Saturday " she asked "why" and I told her "well I've been wanting to go on a date with you, you're so cool and easy to talk to and you're absolutely beautuful. I just want it to go well" Then I texted her after that "I'm a bit tipsy so I don't know if it's me or the alcohol but I'm not cheesy I swear. That ain't me" She didn't reply to either text so I'm really hoping I didn't blow it or maybe come off to strong? Should I bring it up again about how it was a mistake I said that it just forget I even brought it up? Well you just told her you were scare about the date and you also mentioned on the second text you were drinking and got a bit wasted. Now if it was me I would be worried about going on the date with you. Why did you mention were drinking and thus saying you get drunk on drinking times with your mates. I wouldn't have mention this at all. Never tell them your scared or worried about the date, because that shows them weakness on our part. Your the man your have all the cards in your pocket, you suppose to be bold knight in shining armor. Don't ever sound like you can't handle the first date ever again and never tell them your now drunk/tipsy after drinking with your friends. Do never text back to her again until she does.. She might not text back if you doesn't then you might have well blown her off... Too many mistakes on your part.
coolheadal Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 Oh come on I highly doubt I blew it Never show weakness mate. Shoot we're all scare at first then we can get over come it. Just say your looking forward to the date and can't wait to be on it. The second part I wouldn't have mentioned. But you did so just have to wait and see her reaction? If she still wants to go on the date or not? She might not be a drinker than that would have turned her off to the date?
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 Oh come on I highly doubt I blew it I hope not, but it is the title of your thread. She may have been looking for some kind of confident reassurance from you. "Oh, don't be nervous, people tell me all the time I'm very easy to talk to." Like I said, you're gonna have to just wait and see.
preraph Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 Unless the guy was acting too eager, as in Eager Overly Excited to be mature, I never thought someone admitting nervousness on a first or early date was bad. Again, unless they're real immature about it and it reveals a total lack of experience. Main thing is don't ever try to fix a little flub up like this with another awkward conversation. If you say it, then hush up about it forever. Never to be spoken of again, not even after you're totally confident and comfortable. 1
alphamale Posted May 20, 2018 Posted May 20, 2018 Should I bring it up again about how it was a mistake I said that it just forget I even brought it up? NO, FOR GODS SAKE don't bring it up again. just pretend it never happened. you'll look like a pathetic fool if you bring it up 2
act00 Posted May 21, 2018 Posted May 21, 2018 I have never thought lesser of a man who admits he was nervous before a date. Everyone is nervous. I can't say that you blew it. I don't know that I would take your texts to mean anything more than what it was, a little tipsy and loose lips. It's how you manage in person that really counts. I don't know if this would be a deal breaker for this woman; you'll just have to wait and see. Continue your chats like normal and making plans for the date.
snowboy91 Posted May 21, 2018 Posted May 21, 2018 Just wait and see what happens. If she doesn't like the idea of you having a few drinks with your friends on a Saturday night, then it might end up being an issue in the relationship anyway, if it gets to that stage. Either way, don't bring it up again. Just move forward and keep in touch with her - it will hopefully be forgotten quickly.
ChatroomHero Posted May 22, 2018 Posted May 22, 2018 If you want a pair of panties to dry really quick, do the following: 1. Before a first date tell her she makes you nervous. 2. Before a first date tell her she is beautiful. 3. Tell her you are a bit drunk/tipsy while texting her. 4. Apologize before a first date for something innocuous you text...a compliment at that. Want to make it worse? Keep apologizing for it. It doesn't mean she won't date you, but most women I have met are really turned off by weak behavior. A lot of women like men that take a lead or at least have a strong back bone and act like, well, men. You are coming across as weak and spineless. Your damage control will only make it worse. Just let it go and ask her out and stop with the compliments via text. 2
CrazyKatLady Posted May 23, 2018 Posted May 23, 2018 She is probably trying to decide if she should respond to your honesty about drinking...if you are going to drink and date...get your girls where you get your beers-then maybe there won't be any confusion for you and the girl won't have settle for this type of behavior-which I am sure she will--women are easily manipulated this way into not wanting to pass up a man who could be The One...I am sure your date will still be waiting for you on Saturday...
SevenCity Posted May 23, 2018 Posted May 23, 2018 If you want a pair of panties to dry really quick, do the following: 1. Before a first date tell her she makes you nervous. 2. Before a first date tell her she is beautiful. 3. Tell her you are a bit drunk/tipsy while texting her. 4. Apologize before a first date for something innocuous you text...a compliment at that. Want to make it worse? Keep apologizing for it. It doesn't mean she won't date you, but most women I have met are really turned off by weak behavior. A lot of women like men that take a lead or at least have a strong back bone and act like, well, men. You are coming across as weak and spineless. Your damage control will only make it worse. Just let it go and ask her out and stop with the compliments via text. Heed this advice because it is spot on. Nervousness durning dating is for women, not men. As a man you should take the attitude that you are deciding if you like her. You are awesome and if she doesn’t like you, some other woman will. Nothing to be nervous about at all (unless she is cray cray lol). Nervous energy in a woman is very attractive to me. The last first date I was on (who quickly became my girlfriend) was nervous and turned away when I tried to kiss her. I just had the attitude “I can wait baby, but I’m gonna get you eventually”. As the night went on some passerbys told us to get a room Being a man is about being a leader. You need to have confidence so she will follow you. And if she’s not interested? That’s ok too - plenty of women will be. Keep those panties wet, my friend.
PRW Posted May 23, 2018 Posted May 23, 2018 You text was totally weak and lame. The more you talked the worse you made it. You want to know if you screwed the pouche? Just show up at the date and the time and place you agreed on WITHOUT confirming before you go. She will either be there,...or she won't. If you get stood up,...learn you lesson and don't be so weak next time,...or drunk.
Imajerk17 Posted May 23, 2018 Posted May 23, 2018 (edited) Annnnnd on LS, we still like to analyse and overanalyse every text..... Some things just never change here! Kind of a weird exchange but I don't think it is as huge of a deal that many people are making it out to be here. I've seen people come back from worse. About the worst thing you could do is get rattled about that and that includes apologizing again. Just text her like that exchange didn't happen. Meanwhile save the drunk texts and the effusive compliments for the time being. By the way, the "I'm nervous about the date" text from her end was a sign that she may have been planning on flaking anyway. If you read the threads on here, you will note that women can be quite self-protective and meeting a stranger off the internet is scary to some. Edited May 23, 2018 by Imajerk17 2
firestar Posted May 23, 2018 Posted May 23, 2018 This coming Saturday I have a first date with this girl. She's not the cheesy type at all, which is important to this story. Last night I went out for drinks with a few buddies. I ended up getting a bit tipsy. The girl texted me about how she's a little nervous for Saturday. I ended up texting her saying "I'm not gonna lie I'm a bit nervous for Saturday " she asked "why" and I told her "well I've been wanting to go on a date with you, you're so cool and easy to talk to and you're absolutely beautuful. I just want it to go well" Then I texted her after that "I'm a bit tipsy so I don't know if it's me or the alcohol but I'm not cheesy I swear. That ain't me" She didn't reply to either text so I'm really hoping I didn't blow it or maybe come off to strong? Should I bring it up again about how it was a mistake I said that it just forget I even brought it up? I read your reply as possibly a little insincere. If she's shy or very nervous, she might have felt like you're making fun of her? It's hard to say with this info. A good strategy might be to apologize pre-emptively. Even if she wasn't upset an apology won't hurt. And if she was upset the apology might help her forgive, forget, and go out on the date. I'd word it like "I'm not sure if I came off as a bit rude last time. If so, I apologize. I was a little tipsy and might have said something dumb!" Then confirm the date again with her. Once you have the date secured, you can charm and win her over at dinner! 1
Recommended Posts