Henry_shalom Posted March 26, 2018 Posted March 26, 2018 (edited) Good morning everyone. Greetings from Nigeria. I’ve been closely following the threads on this forum and I’m pleased to say the respondents here are doing great. However, I have a problem I want to address and I’d appreciate everyone’s feedback. I’ve been in a long distance relationship with my girl for the past two years. She lives and goes to college in a neighboring state. When we first started out, everything was great…she was great. February last year, we lost contact before she embarked on a one year industrial training program in another state (a college approved mandatory scheme that provides an avenue for students’ to apply their theoretical skills and knowledge into real work situation). She was not on any of the prominent social media networks except for Whatsapp. I tried everything I could to re-establish contact for 10 months, but to no avail. At the time I lost touch I was in the final semester of my program in school. I was writing my dissertation, running laboratory works and analysis and also prepping for my degree exams, the workload was enormous, so I couldn’t find the time to go out there and look for her. In November, I saw her Facebook. I sent her a text requesting for her digits and she replied. I called her and she told that she lost her phone and all her contacts before she left for that program. I believed her, but I was disappointed that she didn't make any effort to get in touch or visit me in school. Since then everything about her changed. I tried to make up for all the lost time, but she doesn’t open up to me. One day I confronted her and asked her if she’s seeing anyone, "she told me she dated a guy during our 10 months break in communication." I asked her “if she had sex with the guy,” she replied “she didn’t.” I was pissed. I asked her again “if she had any intention of telling me this,” she said “she was afraid how I’d react.” Like how am I supposed to react to that. Ever since, she doesn’t call, text or ask after my well being. I’m the one that always call. Sometimes we’ll go 2 weeks without talking. I’ve confronted her severally over this, and she’ll give me flimsy excuses that she has issues at home. Who doesn’t?! She told me weeks ago that she enrolled in a musical talent show in her school and will be gracing the stage this last Saturday. She invited me over to her school but couldn’t go, because I had a sick mother at home to take care of. Saturday night I rang her thrice to ask her how it went down and whether the judge's verdicts are out and she didn’t pick. I called her Sunday afternoon and she asked me to call her back that she’s busy. I rang her thrice in the evening and she didn’t pick and hasn’t called back. What can possibly go wrong that she will ignore my calls. I’ve thought long and hard about the current state of our relationship and I’ve decided to let her go. Nothing good has come out of it, but I’m also hanging on in hopes that things will change. I don’t know if I’m acting out or literally losing my mind. I’m on the horns of dilemma right now and desperately need an advice. Edited March 26, 2018 by Henry_shalom A typographical error
Flame Aura Posted March 26, 2018 Posted March 26, 2018 Yes you should finish things. You are posting because its what you want to do but want confirmation its the right thing. It is. She has already been with another guy. She has moved on. You should too. Dont worry you will find someone better.
CollegeKid101 Posted March 26, 2018 Posted March 26, 2018 You have not been in a relationship for two years..she broke it off last February when she "lost her phone" (she didn't lose her phone for 10 months, she just cut contact with you.) To answer your question, you have lost your mind if you believe this girl even views you as a friend.
act00 Posted March 26, 2018 Posted March 26, 2018 In ten months' time, she would have found a way to reach out and find you if she lost her phone, and I'm assuming you attempted contact with her, and I'm also assuming you could track her down through the app, and she would have responded to it if she was still interested. This relationship ended when she blew you off for 10 months, and she also dated during that time and likely during other periods of distance. Sorry, but you know the answer to this one...it's over. It's unfortunate she left you hanging and blew you off instead of telling you she wanted to break up...it's unfortunate she maintains a idea there might be something still there when she responds to you...she never reaches out to you...take the hint.
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