oneinamillion93 Posted March 9, 2018 Posted March 9, 2018 So a friend kind of introduced us. So we have mutual friends. He seems pretty chill and patience, it’s not like he’s texting me out of boredom. We exchanged instagram in the beginning so it’s not like my looks is the problem also, because if it is the problem he could’ve ghosted me long ago. Due to the busy situation of us he suggested to get dinner at the weekend. I kind of say yes (this is where I don’t know if my answer is kind of vague and misleading him into thinking that I am politely rejecting his offer). This is also my fault that I sent him my text over snapchat. So I don’t really know if my whole text was delivered. Anyway, after this he went silent. I still checking his instagram to see what he’s doing and he still check mine as well. Been a few days and weekend is coming. I don’t know what the heck is this. You guys might told me to move on but I want to know where I did it wrong. Should I have asked the date and time right away? One last thing, should I text him once more time to ask if we still on or move on?
Zahara Posted March 9, 2018 Posted March 9, 2018 What was your response when he asked you to dinner? You need to provide better details. What is “kinda say yes?”
Happy Lemming Posted March 9, 2018 Posted March 9, 2018 How about you call him and clear up the confusion?? If he doesn't answer leave a voicemail. If he doesn't call you back in 24 hours, he is not interested. Simple solution to a simple problem!! 6
Author oneinamillion93 Posted March 9, 2018 Author Posted March 9, 2018 What was your response when he asked you to dinner? You need to provide better details. What is “kinda say yes?” He told me he’s kinda busy this week with work so we can grap dinner at the weekend. I replied back that i am busy as well. And ended up with “sure thing! Weekend it is” How about you call him and clear up the confusion?? If he doesn't answer leave a voicemail. If he doesn't call you back in 24 hours, he is not interested. Simple solution to a simple problem!! Been a few days no talking already
Happy Lemming Posted March 9, 2018 Posted March 9, 2018 Been a few days no talking already So?? Give him a call and clear up the confusion. Who cares if its been a couple days... Men are simple creatures, we need a "YES" or a "NO"; if there was confusion you need to clear it up for us. 5
Author oneinamillion93 Posted March 9, 2018 Author Posted March 9, 2018 So?? Give him a call and clear up the confusion. Who cares if its been a couple days... Men are simple creatures, we need a "YES" or a "NO"; if there was confusion you need to clear it up for us. So the “sure thing” isn’t work here? Should I drop a text asking him if we still on then?
Happy Lemming Posted March 9, 2018 Posted March 9, 2018 So the “sure thing” isn’t work here? Should I drop a text asking him if we still on then? No call him up and talk to him!! Let him hear your voice!! It will make his day to hear a friendly voice/tone. Set the time, place, etc. and go enjoy the date. 2
snowboy91 Posted March 9, 2018 Posted March 9, 2018 This is also my fault that I sent him my text over snapchat. I find Snapchat is generally terrible for actual conversations. Use Messenger or old-school texts. And you know there is only one thing you can do at this point. Try and contact him once more if you want to see him! It's more likely to give you an answer than just waiting.
Author oneinamillion93 Posted March 9, 2018 Author Posted March 9, 2018 I find Snapchat is generally terrible for actual conversations. Use Messenger or old-school texts. And you know there is only one thing you can do at this point. Try and contact him once more if you want to see him! It's more likely to give you an answer than just waiting. But do you think that I should do it or not tho? I don’t know if the way I answered his offer was fine or kind of misleading
I'veseenbetterlol Posted March 9, 2018 Posted March 9, 2018 For me when I was dating vague date setting meant that it never happened. If I'm interested in a date, I put down a time and place. Make back up plans for that day or if you had original plans. go w/those and if he gets disappointed tell him you need plans in advance.
basil67 Posted March 9, 2018 Posted March 9, 2018 But do you think that I should do it or not tho? I don’t know if the way I answered his offer was fine or kind of misleading Are you interested in him? If you are, reach out. If you're not, don't reach out. I fail to see what you've got to lose by showing interest.
basil67 Posted March 9, 2018 Posted March 9, 2018 The reason I think you should reach out was because your acceptance of the date was extremely lacklustre. He probably thinks you're only half interested. If you'd answered with "Sounds great. What's the plan?" you wouldn't be confused right now. This is on you, not on him. 2
Author oneinamillion93 Posted March 9, 2018 Author Posted March 9, 2018 We are making another plan, its my fault for being so vague i guess, he replied almost immediately.
mortensorchid Posted March 10, 2018 Posted March 10, 2018 WHen you at the beginning of something, you must make a plan immediately and communication your want/need - if you haven't heard from him within 48 hours, you will not hear from him again. If he just sends a text and says "text me whenever" that's not a good sign. He's not that interested, he's just a friend then.
kendahke Posted March 10, 2018 Posted March 10, 2018 So a friend kind of introduced us. So we have mutual friends. He seems pretty chill and patience, it’s not like he’s texting me out of boredom. We exchanged instagram in the beginning so it’s not like my looks is the problem also, because if it is the problem he could’ve ghosted me long ago. Due to the busy situation of us he suggested to get dinner at the weekend. I kind of say yes What does " kind of say yes" mean? This is also my fault that I sent him my text over snapchat. So I don’t really know if my whole text was delivered. Anyway, after this he went silent. For how long did he go silent? Why didn't you reach out to him by phone call? I still checking his instagram to see what he’s doing and he still check mine as well. I was on instagram earlier today and I can't figure out how you know someone is checking for you unless they like what you've posted. How do you know he checked? Been a few days and weekend is coming. I don’t know what the heck is this. You guys might told me to move on but I want to know where I did it wrong. Should I have asked the date and time right away? One last thing, should I text him once more time to ask if we still on or move on? A phone call is the more direct way of getting your information. As you already know, a text can get lost, so why would you use a method of communication that you think has already failed you? About the only thing I see is that you didn't dial his number and speak to him. You let too many days go by torturing yourself with speculation and now you're too afraid to dial the number and talk to him. That's not a policy that will get you a good return on investment.
smackie9 Posted March 11, 2018 Posted March 11, 2018 If you want a guy to be responsive, you have to be responsive,.... interact with good communication, make suggestions, throw in a compliment, flirt....will have them eating out of your hand.
stillafool Posted March 11, 2018 Posted March 11, 2018 But do you think that I should do it or not tho? I don’t know if the way I answered his offer was fine or kind of misleading Do you like this guy? If so, yes reach out and find out what is going on. Why the hesitation unless you don't want to go.
Author oneinamillion93 Posted March 12, 2018 Author Posted March 12, 2018 Guys thanks for your kind words. I updated in the previous reply that I reached out and he answered almost immediately. We set up a new brunch get together on Monday. Someone asked how I know he still checked on me, I only updated my instagram story and he’s the same so whenever someone checked out you story updates it would notify you. I only concern about his lifestyle of partying and enjoying raven/festivals which is kinda opposite me, I’m a home body. Sometimes I don’t know if he still contacts me because he really care or because he’s bored. And whether reaching out to him accidentally left him an impression that I am indeed interested in him more than him interested in me. Anyway, I don’t know if he’s really into that kinda lifestyle like he’s showing off on his social media, or what we see is really what it is.
bathtub-row Posted March 12, 2018 Posted March 12, 2018 Sometimes I don’t know if he still contacts me because he really care or because he’s bored. And whether reaching out to him accidentally left him an impression that I am indeed interested in him more than him interested in me. This is exactly why it's better to let the guy follow-up. You'll always wonder.
Author oneinamillion93 Posted March 12, 2018 Author Posted March 12, 2018 This is exactly why it's better to let the guy follow-up. You'll always wonder. So I decided to leave it to him. On Monday before the brunch couple hours and there’s no reply/signal from him then I’ll abort.
bathtub-row Posted March 12, 2018 Posted March 12, 2018 So I decided to leave it to him. On Monday before the brunch couple hours and there’s no reply/signal from him then I’ll abort. I thought plans were already made...?
Author oneinamillion93 Posted March 12, 2018 Author Posted March 12, 2018 I thought plans were already made...? Yep. But I kinda feel like if he suddenly went cold turkey on me the last time he asked me out he could be doing the same this time when it’s the actual date. So I won’t ask him ever again if we still on for brunch or something, if I heard nothing from him, I’ll move on
bathtub-row Posted March 12, 2018 Posted March 12, 2018 Yep. But I kinda feel like if he suddenly went cold turkey on me the last time he asked me out he could be doing the same this time when it’s the actual date. So I won’t ask him ever again if we still on for brunch or something, if I heard nothing from him, I’ll move on I see. Let us know how things go.
Author oneinamillion93 Posted March 13, 2018 Author Posted March 13, 2018 He bailed you guys, he told me something came up and he couldn't make it. So I learned a lesson that whatever a girl reaction is, if a guy interested he will always reach out. I appreciate all the kind words from you guys. Cheers 1
Grey40 Posted March 13, 2018 Posted March 13, 2018 Don't waste your time with guys that don't make definite plans, they're most likely just being nice and trying to fade away without rejecting you. And it also shows they're really not putting any effort into the interaction if they can't come up with an idea for a date
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