Aastevenson Posted February 10, 2018 Posted February 10, 2018 My ex and I have been on and off since I was 19 (I am 26 now). We started off as best friends and it lead to us dating. He stopped talking when he started dating another girl back in 2013. This relationship lasted for 2 years and ended when she moved to a different state. Afterward, we reconciled and started a relationship with one another that started off great. He told me that he was never over me and felt that he made a mistake by dating her and couldn’t get out of the relationship. However, over the last year, our relationship started to go downhill. We started arguing more and I noticed on his phone that he had been texting her. He told me he would stop and then started to pick back up. Things were really good over the next 5 months and then in December he started to act funny again. We made plans to do something for his bday and he brushed me off on that day AND he didn’t get me anything for this past Christmas because we hadn’t been communicating as much. We would literally go a day or two without speaking. Tus ultimately led to a break up in January. We both agreed that we should stay friends and see other people. I chose to do the No contact rule just to clear my mind but I started to miss him a lot and felt that he missed me too because he constantly checked my social media ( mostly Snapchat stories). After 3 weeks of NC, I saw on SC that he flew out to California (where his ex currently lives) to see her ( we live in Alabama). Being the investigator that I am, I checked her Instagram and saw that they went to a basketball game and were taking pics as if they were back in a relationship. I was sooo heartbroken that he moved on so fast that I screenshot the pics and sent them to him along with a long nasty message. I honestly felt that he was talking to her back in December which would make sense why he became so distant. I love him so much and I am physically and emotionally torn apart. I was a great girlfriend to him and we talked about getting married and having children. I really need help on how to move forward.
d0nnivain Posted February 10, 2018 Posted February 10, 2018 You will never move forward while you are still connected. The first step is unfriending him & his Ex/new GF from every social media platform. Now you have to grieve. You two were connected for a long time. Your paths will cross again so you have to be in a place to be civil. Civil doesn't mean friends. It means being polite & having a 5 minute conversation when you bump into each other. Keep yourself busy in the meanwhile When you are tempted to look him up on line call a friend, post here, go for a walk, clean your house . ... in short do anything other than look him up. Also throw out or at least box up any mementos from him & all photos.
HumanMachine Posted February 10, 2018 Posted February 10, 2018 No contact means they aren’t present on any forms of social media. Block him!!
Young mind Posted February 10, 2018 Posted February 10, 2018 I suggest to read the stories in this forum and it will give you some inner peace, what seems like a turmoil will be over in a few months. The feelings of self inadequacy and blame are not displaced but are unjustified. You can list so many positive things about yourself and what you contributed to the Relationship. What seems like a loss isn't really a loss for you, it's a learning opportunity. I suggest to apologize for any angry messages you sent and take the time out for yourself to grieve and move on. You will get the urge to spy on their social media but keep it to a bare minimum, if you can't resist, start to interpret these pictures in a different way, after all , your ex can't be sad on Social media
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