Oladeji123 Posted February 8, 2018 Posted February 8, 2018 So i met this girl online and we immediatly hit it off..weve been talking for about a month and we are finally meeting up this weekend. She hasnt really started conversations with me but she would always continue conversations when i just reply with short answers.. The other night, i was talking about somewhere i wanted to visit and after that topic ended, she sent a picture of a book to me and said it was random but she thought id like it. I asked her if i could borrow it jokingly and she yhh that she would give it to me to borrow when we meet. She then suggested that we could both go to the bookstores and even mentioned a bookstore and said that i would love it (our date was originally just to meet up for coffee). Ive initiated all our conversations so far but she usually carries them on until she wants to end it..shes always teling me about her day when we talk, her interests, her dreams, goals, aspirations But despite all this, a part of me feels like it will all end in failure for me...and that i shouldnt even be excited about this date...something is telling me that she would just friendzone me and there are other guys shes interested in.we were only 82% match on the dating website so its not perfect match.I asked her if she had a type, but the only thing she told me was that the only common thing the guys she's dated had were that they were all into fitness and sports which im not that kind of guy and she knows it...this all just feels like i would just turn into a friend for her and nothing more
SevenCity Posted February 8, 2018 Posted February 8, 2018 So i met this girl online and we immediatly hit it off..weve been talking for about a month and we are finally meeting up this weekend. She hasnt really started conversations with me but she would always continue conversations when i just reply with short answers.. The other night, i was talking about somewhere i wanted to visit and after that topic ended, she sent a picture of a book to me and said it was random but she thought id like it. I asked her if i could borrow it jokingly and she yhh that she would give it to me to borrow when we meet. She then suggested that we could both go to the bookstores and even mentioned a bookstore and said that i would love it (our date was originally just to meet up for coffee). Ive initiated all our conversations so far but she usually carries them on until she wants to end it..shes always teling me about her day when we talk, her interests, her dreams, goals, aspirations But despite all this, a part of me feels like it will all end in failure for me...and that i shouldnt even be excited about this date...something is telling me that she would just friendzone me and there are other guys shes interested in.we were only 82% match on the dating website so its not perfect match.I asked her if she had a type, but the only thing she told me was that the only common thing the guys she's dated had were that they were all into fitness and sports which im not that kind of guy and she knows it...this all just feels like i would just turn into a friend for her and nothing more You've spoken for way too long before meeting and you are far too invested. Regardless of how your online chemisty is, it can be shattered 3 seconds into your first meet/date. Make a habit of meeting them within a week. Decide if you like them in person. Low self esteem is what is causing your anxiety. Remember this: You are awesome. Any girl would be lucky to have you. If she doesn't, it's her loss. And forget about the past guys. If they were that great they would still be around.
Author Oladeji123 Posted February 8, 2018 Author Posted February 8, 2018 You've spoken for way too long before meeting and you are far too invested. Regardless of how your online chemisty is, it can be shattered 3 seconds into your first meet/date. Make a habit of meeting them within a week. Decide if you like them in person. Low self esteem is what is causing your anxiety. Remember this: You are awesome. Any girl would be lucky to have you. If she doesn't, it's her loss. And forget about the past guys. If they were that great they would still be around. She was out of the country, thats why we didnt meet. She was free this weekend so we planned for it.
Maggie4 Posted February 8, 2018 Posted February 8, 2018 Oh I think you're just nervous Be yourself and have fun!
Author Oladeji123 Posted February 8, 2018 Author Posted February 8, 2018 Oh I think you're just nervous Be yourself and have fun! i was at first but now im not sure i am.. i just feel like im just not gonna care when i meet her now because i feel like she is too attractive for me
Mr.Me Posted February 8, 2018 Posted February 8, 2018 How do you know she isn't feeling the same thing you are? Is it possible she is nervous and has self doubt? Yes. Your answer is yes.
sdraw108 Posted February 8, 2018 Posted February 8, 2018 we were only 82% match on the dating website so its not perfect match. I would ignore that. Matching algorithms on dating sites are only slightly above worthless. You should decide if you're a match based on your interactions.
Author Oladeji123 Posted February 8, 2018 Author Posted February 8, 2018 I would ignore that. Matching algorithms on dating sites are only slightly above worthless. You should decide if you're a match based on your interactions. well based on that our interractions, we seem to click really well
Author Oladeji123 Posted February 8, 2018 Author Posted February 8, 2018 How do you know she isn't feeling the same thing you are? Is it possible she is nervous and has self doubt? Yes. Your answer is yes. if she was, she sure does a great job of hiding it and playing it cool.
Chilli Posted February 8, 2018 Posted February 8, 2018 What they have match percentages now , oh brother. Soon we'll be popping out of vending machines after punching in a few numbers. Anyway yeah , just go meet her, see how it goes.
mortensorchid Posted February 8, 2018 Posted February 8, 2018 I don't have much faith in OLD but I can't think of other things to do with my time. Usually now I end up talking to someone for a bit then it just tapers off. I think the same has happened with you like it does for a lot of people. Just move on. You'll be okay. I am trying to get over self esteem issues myself, this is one of the things that makes it all the harder.
she'stheone Posted February 8, 2018 Posted February 8, 2018 Why am i feeling like i am destined for failure and lonliness? Hi Oladeji123, I'm sorry to hear your struggles. As SevenCity said, Low self esteem is what is causing your anxiety. Remember this, what we focus on expands. If you re-read your own post you will see you are focused on failure and loneliness. So, what do you think you're going to get, success and companionship? Not likely. Do some personal development or spiritual work and boost your self-esteem and self-love. When you love yourself more, the world at large loves you more (this includes women you might want to date.) Sending you much love and light
Recommended Posts