zoey15 Posted August 25, 2005 Posted August 25, 2005 I love to give oral sex, but I'm a bit hesitant to give it to MM. I hate that I feel this way because I want to do it so bad. I usually only gave it when I was in a committed (or so I thought) reationship. Am I just being parinoid?
ConfusedMM Posted August 25, 2005 Posted August 25, 2005 Originally posted by zoey15 I love to give oral sex, but I'm a bit hesitant to give it to MM. I hate that I feel this way because I want to do it so bad. I usually only gave it when I was in a committed (or so I thought) reationship. Am I just being parinoid? I went down on my MW all the time. I don't think theres a difference to be honest with you. Oral sex is just that, oral sex. It doesn't matter whom with. It's all the same. I mean obviously different people, different tastes, different shapes and so on. But I don't know why you're reluctant to go down on your MM. Is there a specific reason?
Art_Critic Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 Is it because you are afriad you will taste his wife ?
reservoirdog1 Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 Is it because you are afriad you will taste his wife ? Kind of an occupational hazard of being an OP, no?
I was the OW Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 I went down on my exMM and I could never get him to cum! I even gave him head for 30 minutes and I still couldn't get him to cum. He said it wasn't me, it was him. He told me he can't cum from oral. He said out of all the BJ's he has been givin he has only came a couple of times. Let me tell ya, that was the most frustrating thing ever. I have never had a problem getting a man off with oral but with him, I couldn't. How could a man possibly not have an orgasim from oral? He said it felt good, and I am sure it did if he let me do it for 30 minutes, it was just very frustrating. Maybe he has some weird thing about cumming in a woman's mouth, I don't know.
RecordProducer Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 Originally posted by zoey15 I usually only gave it when I was in a committed (or so I thought) reationship. Am I just being paranoid? Note that she said "or so I thought"! I think Zoey is afraid that he screwed his wife and didn't wash his dick afterwards.
omgWHYME Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 LMAO yall are to funny. BUt i think i'd feel a little wierd if i went down on a MM i mean he is DOING his wife on the side. you have to be cautious with things like that there are STD's out there. even if you use protection you have to be comfortable with it.
933KJL Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 Originally posted by I was the OW I went down on my exMM and I could never get him to cum! I even gave him head for 30 minutes and I still couldn't get him to cum. He said it wasn't me, it was him. He told me he can't cum from oral. He said out of all the BJ's he has been givin he has only came a couple of times. Let me tell ya, that was the most frustrating thing ever. I have never had a problem getting a man off with oral but with him, I couldn't. How could a man possibly not have an orgasim from oral? He said it felt good, and I am sure it did if he let me do it for 30 minutes, it was just very frustrating. Maybe he has some weird thing about cumming in a woman's mouth, I don't know. It takes an exceptional woman to make me cum orally. Some guys are just like that--don't feeel slighted. Asfor the diseases and so forth, the liklihood of contracting something orally is far less than by intercourse. Anymore, by today's standards, oral sex is almost safe sex. Teens today think of it as foreplay and I am from the school where I think it is perhaps MORE intimate than intercourse But I love it--it is the rare woman that I don't like to go down upon!
Author zoey15 Posted August 26, 2005 Author Posted August 26, 2005 I think Zoey is afraid that he screwed his wife and didn't wash his dick afterwards. That's my whole point. I didn't have much time to go into detail yesterday when I posted, but yes that's similar to what I was thinking. For instance, when I was in a committed relationship (and this could be all in my head, because he could've been cheating on me) I would think "okay this guy is all mine, therefore I didn't have to worry about where he was sticking his dick". But now that I'm seeing this MM, it was a concern until I did it last night. I said f8%@ it, and it was great.
Art_Critic Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 Originally posted by zoey15 That's my whole point. Zoey .. You are not the only one with concerns like that .. As a guy if I'm dating someone that is dating others it is on my mind when I go down on her .. I'm I getting any sloppy seconds .. and it can change the whole experience
izzybelle Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 hadn't ever really thought about it before ... when i was with exMM, the only times we saw each other were when he was out of town, so i knew he hadn't been with her (without a shower in between ) so those thoughts never, ever crossed my mind. so it wasn't a problem. i suppose if we'd lived closer and i'd known he'd come straight from home, my feelings might have been different
mopar crazy Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 I figured that was why you didn't want to go down on him...fearing he maybe had slept w/ his W b4 he came to see you. I could see why you would be worried about it. As a BW I sure hope that my own H didn't sleep w/ the exOW b4 I went down on him w/o taking a shower first I never even thought of that! I was in denial of the A, I just couldn't accept that he was screwing someone else during our seperation.
Author zoey15 Posted August 26, 2005 Author Posted August 26, 2005 We took a shower last night before the dirty deed, so I'll just continue to wash him first.
mopar crazy Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 Originally posted by zoey15 We took a shower last night before the dirty deed, so I'll just continue to wash him first. I just hope he takes a shower afterwards. If he is still having sex w/ his W I am sure she wouldn't want sloppy seconds if she knew. Sorry to say it but it's true.
DepressedWaiting Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 I most certainly would NOT go down on MM. Once he asked I slapped him in the face and screamed at him "Get your wife to take you in the mouth!!!". He never dared asked since.
quankanne Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 I most certainly would NOT go down on MM. Once he asked I slapped him in the face and screamed at him "Get your wife to take you in the mouth!!!" that's too funny ... but in a way true. I don't mind doing it, but I don't think my husband enjoys it as much as I do, so I wonder if there's not something in the back of his head telling him that only "dirty" girls give head, not "nice" ones, especially one a man is in a committed relationship with. I say, heck, if it's enjoyable to the one performing the act, go for it.
whichwayisup Posted August 26, 2005 Posted August 26, 2005 BUt i think i'd feel a little wierd if i went down on a MM i mean he is DOING his wife on the side. Sorry, I can't bite my tongue on this one... Uhmm, he's doing you on the side. Not his wife. He's married. You're the OW. If you have fears he's been with his wife and not showered before being with you then there's something seriously wrong here! Let's hope EVERYBODY showers in this kind of situation. Kinda gross thinking of who's got who's fluids where...
mopar crazy Posted August 27, 2005 Posted August 27, 2005 Originally posted by whichwayisup Sorry, I can't bite my tongue on this one... Uhmm, he's doing you on the side. Not his wife. He's married. You're the OW. If you have fears he's been with his wife and not showered before being with you then there's something seriously wrong here! Let's hope EVERYBODY showers in this kind of situation. Kinda gross thinking of who's got who's fluids where... WWIU, I must of missed her comment "doing his W on the side" or I would of said something myself.
RecordProducer Posted August 27, 2005 Posted August 27, 2005 Originally posted by quankanne only "dirty" girls give head, not "nice" ones Dirty is good!
mopar crazy Posted August 27, 2005 Posted August 27, 2005 Originally posted by DepressedWaiting I most certainly would NOT go down on MM. Once he asked I slapped him in the face and screamed at him "Get your wife to take you in the mouth!!!". He never dared asked since. WOW!!! Did he go to his W then?
DepressedWaiting Posted August 27, 2005 Posted August 27, 2005 Mopar, no... I HIGHLY doubt his wife does that to him. He claims he hasn't had sex with her in 5 months and "isn't attracted to her". Who knows the real truth. I treat my MM very badly with constant turmoil and screaming about the situation. It has been this bad for the past 9 months or so and getting a lot worse. I cannot get through a single conversation or visit without flying off the handle. Last time I slapped him in the face again and kicked him between the legs so hard I almost sprained my ankle. I even spit in his face (I have NEVER done that to anyone before). I scream at him constantly that I'm not his bloody whore on the side and I refuse to do this anymore. I have finally flipped and have had it and am about to do something very drastic to overcome this. I have been in this too long and the pain has just done something to me.. it has changed me. One person can only take so much pain... so much pain before....
whichwayisup Posted August 27, 2005 Posted August 27, 2005 Originally posted by DepressedWaiting Mopar, no... I HIGHLY doubt his wife does that to him. He claims he hasn't had sex with her in 5 months and "isn't attracted to her". Who knows the real truth. I treat my MM very badly with constant turmoil and screaming about the situation. It has been this bad for the past 9 months or so and getting a lot worse. I cannot get through a single conversation or visit without flying off the handle. Last time I slapped him in the face again and kicked him between the legs so hard I almost sprained my ankle. I even spit in his face (I have NEVER done that to anyone before). I scream at him constantly that I'm not his bloody whore on the side and I refuse to do this anymore. I have finally flipped and have had it and am about to do something very drastic to overcome this. I have been in this too long and the pain has just done something to me.. it has changed me. One person can only take so much pain... so much pain before.... Taking another angle here...Maybe you're acting this way hoping you'll push him away and end it. I'm sorry but you seem to have some anger issues and being physically abusive is just wrong. Doesn't matter that you're a woman, you don't hit people. I'm shocked into why he is staying with you. You hit him, kick him, scream at him and SPIT (wtf? how old are you?) at him? If I were him I'd run for hills. Yes you've flipped and the best thing you can do is GET OUT of the situation as it's made you do things that I'm hoping you normally don't do. It's an unhealthy place you're in now and being with MM has affected you so badly. The pain and anguish you've put yourself through and allowed him to treat you like a second class citizen, I'm glad that you're seeing this and hopefully will end it ... If you don't, he should. I don't know what he's getting out of it except abuse. To help you cope, find a therapist to talk to. This MM and the affair has damaged you and talking to a professional will help so much. Wish you luck though. I'm sure it's not easy on you but anything, being alone is better than where you are now with him.
mopar crazy Posted August 27, 2005 Posted August 27, 2005 Originally posted by DepressedWaiting Mopar, no... I HIGHLY doubt his wife does that to him. He claims he hasn't had sex with her in 5 months and "isn't attracted to her". Who knows the real truth. I treat my MM very badly with constant turmoil and screaming about the situation. It has been this bad for the past 9 months or so and getting a lot worse. I cannot get through a single conversation or visit without flying off the handle. Last time I slapped him in the face again and kicked him between the legs so hard I almost sprained my ankle. I even spit in his face (I have NEVER done that to anyone before). I scream at him constantly that I'm not his bloody whore on the side and I refuse to do this anymore. I have finally flipped and have had it and am about to do something very drastic to overcome this. I have been in this too long and the pain has just done something to me.. it has changed me. One person can only take so much pain... so much pain before.... Oh my!!! You are a very angry person right now. Is that b/c of the relationship between you two? Are you in NC w/ him? I can't remember if you said you were or not. If not, I would go NC b/c this is not a healthy relationship, whether he is a MM or not. I am ashamed to admit it but I have popped my H in the mouth once and I felt awful about it. He went to work the next day w/ a fat lip. I was shocked I did it. My H is 6'4 and 250 lbs and at the time I was only 130 lbs and 5'5 so he is much bigger than me. I was scared of what he might do b/c I never hit him b4 and we weren't even M yet. He made me so damn angry and it was just a reflex. I hurried and walked away. I know when you get angry it is really hard not to want to punch that person who is making you angry. I know my H knows how to push my buttons and I just want to beat the crap out of him but I know violence is never the answer. Sometimes it's really hard to hold it back. I have to walk away when he pi$$es me off. B4 his A we had an abusive M and I believe that was a lot of our M problems. We both had short fuses, him more than me. We both went to IC b4 we decided to work on the M. I told him I refuse to work on the M until he went to IC for his anger problems and why he had the A. I have learned to walk away when we start arguing. I have learned that if he says something hurtful that I will not speak to him until he can speak nicely to me and apologizes. Being in a verbal and/or physically abusive relationship isn't good. Life is too short. I hope that you let go of this MM so you can work on yourself. Obiviously being w/ him isn't good for either one of you.
DepressedWaiting Posted August 27, 2005 Posted August 27, 2005 I'm not like this normally. Not at all whatsoever. I am in my mid twenties. I am not myself anymore. My behavior towards him is stirctly due to the situation regarding how he is having me on the side like some whore and I'm realizing that is all I'm worth to him. That is something that is VERY painful to come to terms with. This was months ago and hasn't happened since and won't be happening again. He has b*llsh*tted me for so long... constant lies... excuses... more lies... more excuses... more lies... more excsues... more lies... more time flies by... more lies... more time flies by... more lies... that I have had it with him and FLIPPED. If he weren't married we would get along GREAT. We did get along great until the pain just got worse and worse for me until it consumed me every second I was with or without him. The trumoil only started this past entire year. EDIT: You know what he says to me? He tells me if I can make it through 30 days with NO turmoil he will make a definite decision as to whether he is going to divorce or not and when. He has been begging me to stop the turmoil because I am ruining his life. I even caused him to have panic attacks. He claims if I can make it 30 days with no trumoil he can then make a serious decision as to whether he is going to divorce or not. He claims because of all the trumoil I am causing him it has pushed him so far away he cannot make a decision and needs me to prove that I can go 30 days without any turmoil so that he can make this serious decision whichwayisup, Yes, he is getting nothing out of this relationship with me for the past 9 months but abuse. I have made his life a living h*ll. Now he is trying to pull the above stunt on me. I don't know if it's out of shear desperation or what. .
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