ch1910 Posted January 29, 2018 Posted January 29, 2018 I have been on two dates with this guy. He text me almost every day. He also sent me flowers to work. So, yes he is nice. I have no attraction to him besides him being nice and we work in the same field. I live in a very small town and not a lot of guys to date. I also am a farmer so can't really "leave to find myself". I didn’t look forward to the two dates we had and I get annoyed and stressed out hoping he will text me because I do not want to text him. I don’t date so my family keep telling me “give him another chance” or “your aunt and uncle hated each other before they fell in love”. He has two other younger brothers who are married and have kids, so I have heard through other people that he REALLY wants to settle down and have a wife and kids. I am 26 and no where near that, I haven’t dated many people and would like to see whats out there, maybe someone I am excited to talk to and have a physical attraction to. What should I do? Should I go on a third date, even though I have been sick to my stomach about having to go on the date?
greymatter Posted January 29, 2018 Posted January 29, 2018 No way, I wouldn't agree to go out with him again. I would let him know nicely that you enjoyed meeting him but the two of you are not a match. 4
Happy Lemming Posted January 29, 2018 Posted January 29, 2018 First Off, I like to tell you how impressed I am that you are a Female Farmer. I have a female cousin and she runs her own farm (by herself). She works incredible hours, and her farm is successful. So Kudos to female farmers like you!! Next, if you don't want to go out with the guy, then don't, especially when you are "sick to your stomach" about going on the next date. Don't force yourself to like someone to please your family. You are you, and you get to live your life, your way!! I don't like the comparisons to other family members being married and having kids. You are only 26, plenty of time if you do want to go that route. Now, I'm not a fan of on-line dating. I prefer to go out into the world and meet people. But you do have a special circumstance, so have you researched "Farmers only". I have no experience with it, but I have heard of it. Personally, I would go into town from time to time, when you can get away from the farm and force yourself to talk to 3 new people each time you are there. It can be grocery store, public library, or local pub. Just my two cents... 2
d0nnivain Posted January 29, 2018 Posted January 29, 2018 Do not go on a 3rd date with him. It would be mean to lead him on & pretend to like you when in fact you are sick to your stomach. As much as you want to take the easy way out & ghost don't do that. Pick up the phone & call him. Thank him for the 2 dates & the flowers but say you aren't feeling it & you don't think you two have a future. Wish him will in his search for a companion. The be done with him. Yes, that will be a difficult conversation but it's the right thing to do. 2
Bobbyb82 Posted January 30, 2018 Posted January 30, 2018 I have been on two dates with this guy. He text me almost every day. He also sent me flowers to work. So, yes he is nice. I have no attraction to him besides him being nice and we work in the same field. I live in a very small town and not a lot of guys to date. I also am a farmer so can't really "leave to find myself". I didn’t look forward to the two dates we had and I get annoyed and stressed out hoping he will text me because I do not want to text him. I don’t date so my family keep telling me “give him another chance” or “your aunt and uncle hated each other before they fell in love”. He has two other younger brothers who are married and have kids, so I have heard through other people that he REALLY wants to settle down and have a wife and kids. I am 26 and no where near that, I haven’t dated many people and would like to see whats out there, maybe someone I am excited to talk to and have a physical attraction to. What should I do? Should I go on a third date, even though I have been sick to my stomach about having to go on the date? If you don’t want to go...don’t go. In the end, it’s mercy on your part to end things now. Have you been giving him attention on social networks(liking post, messages etc..)? 1
Author ch1910 Posted January 30, 2018 Author Posted January 30, 2018 Well, I ended it with him. I do not feel guilty about it and my friends and family were surprisingly okay with my decision not to continue to talk/see him. So I think it was the right thing to do. Thank you everyone for the wonderful advice and support. I really appreciate it. ALSO, thank you Happy Lemming for the support of female farmers. It is much needed 2
I'veseenbetterlol Posted January 30, 2018 Posted January 30, 2018 Do not go on a 3rd date with him. It would be mean to lead him on & pretend to like you when in fact you are sick to your stomach. As much as you want to take the easy way out & ghost don't do that. Pick up the phone & call him. Thank him for the 2 dates & the flowers but say you aren't feeling it & you don't think you two have a future. Wish him will in his search for a companion. The be done with him. Yes, that will be a difficult conversation but it's the right thing to do. This is exactly what you need to do! Rejection is extremely hard, but a lot kinder then leading someone on or ghosting them. There was one guy who rejected me (nicely) after the 2nd date, that was kind of painful, but def not as painful as when guys led me on. 1
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