why did my first boyfriend put me through hell and will he change?

[lunarboy92]

I also feel like me and his ex aren't crazy... because if we were doing that much for him, and taking care of him - the least he could've given in return was a monogamous relationship yet his sex addiction causes him to have tons of broken relationships... like with his ex - he was constantly doing shad stuff

[olivetree]

I also feel like me and his ex aren't crazy... because if we were doing that much for him, and taking care of him - the least he could've given in return was a monogamous relationship yet his sex addiction causes him to have tons of broken relationships... like with his ex - he was constantly doing shad stuff

 

Using terms like "crazy" etc isn't helpful.

 

You might not be crazy, but you need to do some inner work on yourself so that you do not accept being treated like dirt.

[lunarboy92]

i don't know if this is normal after an abusive relationship but i feel like i'm constantly reliving, how he viewed me or made me feel: rejected, not sexy, not good looking enough, not deserving of sex.. so there is a lack of sex drive and a fear of sex.

i'm sad.

[lunarboy92]

Sometimes I feel like he is still emotionally controlling me from afar. He found out a friend i was hanging out with, and started talking to him on Grindr shortly after. He is always liking my sister’s pictures on Instagram, and I’ve started to go out in the social scene of all his friends and I even caused some drama in it, only for him to find it. He’s still influencing so many of my decisions and I think it’s unhealthy. Would the smart thing be to stop the safety behaviour of going out, in hopes I’d see him and be able to control my friends to not talk to him or just to spy or watch, or to know my friends aren’t betraying me?

[lunarboy92]

Do you think I made the right decision to cut out one of my friends who recently became friends with him because I see it as being complicit, in my abuse experience?