Quick question, post first date.

[Sm12345]

Didn’t overreact, but I sent this around 8pm tonight (she still hasn’t responded btw, since saying she’d message after her son went to bed...)

 

“Hey, I was thinking we could check out that museum exhibit (we discussed on the first date) on Saturday around 4/4:30, then go for drinks at the Pump after.. let me know if you’re free.”

 

If she doesn’t respond tomorrow, I’ll have my answer. :/

[Jj66]

Do what you want. Don't worry about what she might think. I mean how long do you play this game? More likely to find a compatible partner by being authentic. For example, If you are the clingy type and are trying to date someone who hates that, it's best to be rejected early in the first few dates for being too clingy than for it to happen 3 months down the road when you become yourself again.

[I'veseenbetterlol]

Not sure why the word ‘parents’ was inserted in there..

 

Yes, she did respond in the initial text, but I didn’t hear anything after that which might point to her falling asleep or it might point to her stringing me along. Who knows.

 

I’ve made other plans with two other women this coming weekend, and won’t be replying to her texts unless she makes concrete efforts.

 

Good on you, exactly the way to go if one doesn't work out. To me this sounds like a lack of interest.

[arblaster]

Don't worry about trying to play it cool. If she's interested, she'll be expecting a second date and won't hang around all year. Take command, ask her on a second date, and see how it goes.

[Sm12345]

I’m honestly trying to be sympathetic to the idea of someone with a 7 year old that she has 70% of the time, working a full time job. I realize she might’ve fallen asleep then felt embarrassed. But in this age of cell phones and computers it takes two seconds to send a quick text. She told me on our first date that a guy she was interested in going out with again blew up on her for not responding and I thought that was a little unreasonable but seeing her not respond to me, or toss out bread crumbs, I can totally understand.

 

She also said she hadn’t had a relationship in almost three years and I can see why, her communication skills are nonexistent.

[Sm12345]

Interesting.. she just sent this “I think (hope) I will finally have a minute to breathe tonight. Are you around?”

 

What should I say? Should I even bother responding?

[Miss Spider]

I certainly wouldn't. This person is a low interest time waster

[Sm12345]

Just as an experiment (I’m done with this one, so why not..) I actually called her out on it , saying that if I’m interested in someone I message them back.

 

She messaged me immediately saying that she’s a single mom with a full time job starting over again.. some sob story about me not being sympathetic to the plight of the single mom (my mum raised me as a single parent, so that was ironic)

 

I told her that I was empathetic, but that I wasn’t interested in waiting around to make plans, that my time is valuable, etc.

 

What a wacko.

[Sbla22]

Calling women out on that type of behaviour always leads to a sob story or them saying something like 'well this shows I dodged a bullet!' It's sort of a catch 22 - say nothing and you wont hear from them again. Say something and you will get made to feel you are the bad guy and then never hear from them again.

 

I think women get annoyed so much when you call them out so they can pretend their behaviour is fine and label you as the one who has issues.

 

You're probably best off just letting them fade and think of it as their loss. But it's so tough when you have minimal options.