SevenCity Posted January 20, 2018 Posted January 20, 2018 I completely disagree. This is tantamount to lying. If these women don't want to date separated men, then you should absolutely not trick them into doing something that doesn't fit with their values. But it won't only filter out the ones with the hard and fast rules. If he lists it, it will force women to make a judgement about him (which is usually seconds). If he were a woman I would list it. But as a guy on OLD, he doesn't need anything else working against him. I treat dating like a job interview. I don't list all my negatives right out of the gate. How many people on an interview will say "I'm probably going to take a long lunch once and a while and will be responding to Facebook messages and texts from friends ahead of work emails. Oh and I'm sure I'll be taking a few sick days when I'm not actually sick". OLD is very one dimensional. You have age, pics, and stats and will be filtered on all three. Look how many people marry someone who wasn't the image of who they had envisioned marrying because other good qualities outweighed the less desirable ones. Listing "I'm married" on a dating profile is a bad idea, despite if it's technically true.
Lamartine Posted January 20, 2018 Posted January 20, 2018 But it won't only filter out the ones with the hard and fast rules. If he lists it, it will force women to make a judgement about him (which is usually seconds). If he were a woman I would list it. But as a guy on OLD, he doesn't need anything else working against him. I treat dating like a job interview. I don't list all my negatives right out of the gate. How many people on an interview will say "I'm probably going to take a long lunch once and a while and will be responding to Facebook messages and texts from friends ahead of work emails. Oh and I'm sure I'll be taking a few sick days when I'm not actually sick". OLD is very one dimensional. You have age, pics, and stats and will be filtered on all three. Look how many people marry someone who wasn't the image of who they had envisioned marrying because other good qualities outweighed the less desirable ones. Listing "I'm married" on a dating profile is a bad idea, despite if it's technically true. I see where you are coming from. Maybe a better policy is to tell the woman when they meet in person. I think it needs to be disclosed on the first or second date though.
mortensorchid Posted January 21, 2018 Posted January 21, 2018 This is sticky. I believe it when a person is separated in that they are not living in the same house with that person, which you and your wife are no longer. You are still legally married, but you have not made it official because of the assets you are debating. What assets are you talking about? And why can't you settle upon it? In terms of your dating life ... You want to move on from your marriage, to be sure. It's over and done with, but ... Not legally. This will make women wary of you. They will wonder why you don't end things. What to say? Tell them that you are separated from your wife and you will not get back together.
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