1Jessie86 Posted January 18, 2018 Posted January 18, 2018 My guy says he won't consider marriage until we discuss more of the deeper subjects and more about time frames on when we want to get married or have kids. We're about to hit the 3 month mark. Is it too soon to discuss all of this?
LilySun Posted January 18, 2018 Posted January 18, 2018 3 months sounds way too soon. But, if you anticipate a long term future together it's not bad to discuss each other's long term desires and expectations. It just seems way too soon to decide that you should definitely get married. 1
d0nnivain Posted January 18, 2018 Posted January 18, 2018 3 months is way too soon to discuss marriage. it's not too soon to move away from superficial conversations & start talking about the scary stuff so you can learn where the other's core values lie. this is where you ask the hard Qs about the so called taboo subjects: politics, religion, etc. 1
basil67 Posted January 18, 2018 Posted January 18, 2018 Are you discussing what he wants from relationships in general, or is this specifically about what he thinks of marriage with you? It's not too soon to ask what he wants from a relationship, but it's too early to ask it in relation to you. 1
MsJayne Posted January 18, 2018 Posted January 18, 2018 At the three month mark you're still in the phase of getting to know each other. Serious talk of marriage at that stage would frighten any mature person away. It's one thing to tell a new partner you hope to get married and have kids one day, quite another to start pressuring them to choose the wedding date and baby names.
RecentChange Posted January 18, 2018 Posted January 18, 2018 Waaiit... Is this the guy you were saying that you are finding his habits annoying? Any way - first I agree with others, 3 months is too soon to be talking about entering into a contract for all eternity. Second, I agree with him, you both need to talk about all of the other important stuff before you start taking about the marriage stuff. Like.... Kids, do you want them? Does he? How many do you envision? Do you want to be a working mom, or raise the kids those first years? The of course comes roles in a household - do you all agree on what that would look like? Agree on financial issues? Family issues? Life goals? Travel the world, build a business, what? Once you are on the same page on everything. Deeply in love, committed.... The start talking about marriage. For me, I have always known I never wanted kids, so it's never been too early for that conversation (I don't want to waste anyone's time). Figure out what your big issues are - then discuss those first. 2
alphamale Posted January 18, 2018 Posted January 18, 2018 My guy says he won't consider marriage until we discuss more of the deeper subjects and more about time frames on when we want to get married or have kids. We're about to hit the 3 month mark. Is it too soon to discuss all of this? if both of you are in your 20s then it's too soon. if both of you are in your 50s then it's not too soon... 2
mrs rubble Posted January 18, 2018 Posted January 18, 2018 Agree with this (alpha male). My now husband and I were engaged after 4 months, we were 40 and 46, we didn't actually get married for another 5 years though. 1
bachdude Posted January 18, 2018 Posted January 18, 2018 Uh...yeah...way way too soon. You two do not know each other yet. 2 years minimum before thinking of marriage is my recommendation. You need to get an idea of how this guy will treat you in the long run. Even jerks are good boyfriends at 3 months.
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