Hurtingguy Posted January 10, 2018 Posted January 10, 2018 hey all back again so for all the advice you guys gave me about my last relationship helped me get past my ex and have found myself a wonmderful new woman. so im going toget right to it and would like feedback negative and positive. so im met this woman im with now in august, we clicked right away had a great connection and things moved really fast. we fell in love very fast and started our relatonship really quick, now in the begining i made the horrible mistake of sleeping with one of me exs,she found out i told her everything and she wanted to continue the relationship with me, so we did and not inkydid we but i ended up moving in with her and we got a new house together,(rent) so it was me her and her 13 year old daughter in the same house. we made a deal that for her to start trusting me again i would need to tellher everything no matter what,i loet her install a spy app on my phone so sghe can see evrything, and its been helping her and shes coming around again. i had to call my recent ex and ask her if someone can comebyband pick up my mail and the rest of my personal belongings cause we use to live togtehr,it was a harmless convo buty last for about an hour, now i told my current gf that if iwas to contact her that i would tell her and do it in front of her,but i didnt and didnt tell her cause she was having a bad day (has a lot of axiety) andf= what a mistake, she saw on the spy app that incalled her and felt betrayed and woke me up in the middle of the night and made me leave,so i came to my dads... ive apologized and comtinue to prove to her that i wont cheat again or lie or withhod anything fromer her. we still are togetehr but arent living togeter at the moment,we still talk all day and facetime before bed, icontinue to go and see her at our home but she wont let me spend the night, we make love and are happy when weare with each other. but shes still distant with love,when she gets upset she tells me that she cant trudt me and doesnt feel safe anymore, that she doesnt know whats going tohappen and she needs space and time to think ablout what she wants, and other times shes soo loving and affectionate and caring and talking about out future and one day shell let me move back in, its just so hot and cold,im confused, iknow how much ibhurt and betrayed her but im trying to prove that i wont burt her again cause i wont, i see how ,life is like without her its ****, lonelly,and sad, i know i dont dsesrve her and i messed up and that i dont deserve anotgher chance,but what can i do to prove to her that i am the man she needs and will be loyal cause i really will anyways thanks for reading and any insight will help
ExpatInItaly Posted January 11, 2018 Posted January 11, 2018 You can't really prove it to her, OP. You have broken her trust in a couple big ways now. Only time will tell if you are going to be more honest and transparent. Your words have no value for her anymore; actions speak louder. And your actions are showing her she can't believe what you tell her. Give her time and space. She can't open her heart to you, and you might just have to accept that it's not going to work. Why did you two move so quickly, though? You went from 0 to 100 in the span of just a few months, which is generally not a great idea. What's up with that? 1
Author Hurtingguy Posted January 11, 2018 Author Posted January 11, 2018 i know but i prove to her that she can ive given her acces to all social media she has a spy app that lets her see my cals and exts and browswer history and every ap i use, we moved in together cause we had such an amazing connection it felt right we did everything so fast we got matching tattoos just small ones, then she got pregnant but had a misscarriage, the other day we where togetehr andf it was a great day for us so much love and affection,from both of us,then yesterday she was cold and distant and today i stillhavent heard from her,imlosing my mind slowly just trying to figure outwhats going on
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted January 11, 2018 Posted January 11, 2018 i know but i prove to her that she can ive given her acces to all social media she has a spy app that lets her see my cals and exts and browswer history and every ap i use, we moved in together cause we had such an amazing connection it felt right we did everything so fast we got matching tattoos just small ones, then she got pregnant but had a misscarriage, the other day we where togetehr andf it was a great day for us so much love and affection,from both of us,then yesterday she was cold and distant and today i stillhavent heard from her,imlosing my mind slowly just trying to figure outwhats going on Wow. In my humble opinion, you guys moved WAY too fast, especially considering there's a 13 year old child in the mix! My advice is to stay living apart while you try to regain your trust, and do not allow yourselves to become pregnant again. You're not stable enough as a couple to bring a life into the world.
Author Hurtingguy Posted January 11, 2018 Author Posted January 11, 2018 but we where stable enough it wasnt planned it jjust happened, its just been the past 2 weeks that have been rough and im hoping we can get through this,im not looking to get pit down by anyone but lookinf for some help on what to do here to try and fix this big mess i created
HumanMachine Posted January 11, 2018 Posted January 11, 2018 but we where stable enough it wasnt planned it jjust happened, its just been the past 2 weeks that have been rough and im hoping we can get through this,im not looking to get pit down by anyone but lookinf for some help on what to do here to try and fix this big mess i created Why do you type like this? 1
usa1ah Posted January 11, 2018 Posted January 11, 2018 You need to learn to be honest. That is all. You cheated on her then after you fix that mistake you talk to an ex for over an hour. She might have believed it was nothing if it was just to ask when you could pick your stuff up. That would have only taken a few mins. I don’t think you can. Bad day or not you had rules to follow because you cheated. You chose to disregard the rules instead. It boils down to disrespecting the girl you are with, well was with.
Author Hurtingguy Posted January 12, 2018 Author Posted January 12, 2018 i know i need to be honest i just didnt want to upset her,and ill i did was burt her more by not telling her that i called, it was an innocent convo and i know that doesnt make it right and i wont try to justify what i did i know it was wrong, today she told me i need to figure out how to make this right, ikeep doing eberything wrong i just dont know what to do anymore,ikeep calling and texting to the point that its just pushing her away, i need help LS i want to spend my life with this woman and she does too, but all im doing is making things worse please tell me what to do please
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