rightondude Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 Nah I’m in NC, I FLY back and forth for big things when I have too. There are plenty of things that keep me busy (acting wise) around NC/SC though. well dude you should be golden then. Not many (0) women I know (even back in my 20's or in my 40's) would chose a cop or preacher over a working actor who's jetting out to LA. Those are a dime a dozen down here (heck there's a church on every street). Are you in IMDB? That should be about all it takes to score a date! You must be going for the country girls?
Author Curry30 Posted January 1, 2018 Author Posted January 1, 2018 well dude you should be golden then. Not many (0) women I know (even back in my 20's or in my 40's) would chose a cop or preacher over a working actor who's jetting out to LA. Those are a dime a dozen down here (heck there's a church on every street). Are you in IMDB? That should be about all it takes to score a date! You must be going for the country girls? I took about a 5-6 year break because of my health(which really never got better) and then that’s when my mom got really bad. So I just got back into acting 2 two years ago. And I live in a small town in NC so yes country girls are a large percent.
Author Curry30 Posted January 1, 2018 Author Posted January 1, 2018 I feel you, that’s why if I don’t find anyone soon it’s notgoona be a big deal
Cobra_X Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 I'm 25, almost 26.still live at home and it's because of 2 reasons mostly, 1: my mother is dying and I'm helping my father taking care of her. 2: I was born with severe epilepsy and it's almost killed my once or twice. I'm saving up the money When I can work, I'm also a actor with agent. I'm just wondering if any of this would be a deal breaker for a realationship or(a date) I've never had one. Been taking care of people my whole life Listen... I know a lot of women are going to say that it's sweet you are taking care of your mom, but honestly... they will punish you for it in dating. Let's be honest, you are not doing it for sympathy points. You are doing it because unlike the rest of us, you know your mothers time is short and you have the opportunity to maximize that. My mom will likely be around another 20 years... and I will spend about 1 week a year with her. That thought makes me sad. Don't mention your epilepsy issues to any potential dates until you are farther into the process. This is my advice. Most women will not like that you live at home, but you can overcome this by showing that you are "ambitious". 1
Author Curry30 Posted January 1, 2018 Author Posted January 1, 2018 Listen... I know a lot of women are going to say that it's sweet you are taking care of your mom, but honestly... they will punish you for it in dating. Let's be honest, you are not doing it for sympathy points. You are doing it because unlike the rest of us, you know your mothers time is short and you have the opportunity to maximize that. My mom will likely be around another 20 years... and I will spend about 1 week a year with her. That thought makes me sad. Don't mention your epilepsy issues to any potential dates until you are farther into the process. This is my advice. Most women will not like that you live at home, but you can overcome this by showing that you are "ambitious". Thanks for your reply
SevenCity Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 Listen... I know a lot of women are going to say that it's sweet you are taking care of your mom, but honestly... they will punish you for it in dating. Let's be honest, you are not doing it for sympathy points. You are doing it because unlike the rest of us, you know your mothers time is short and you have the opportunity to maximize that. My mom will likely be around another 20 years... and I will spend about 1 week a year with her. That thought makes me sad. Don't mention your epilepsy issues to any potential dates until you are farther into the process. This is my advice. Most women will not like that you live at home, but you can overcome this by showing that you are "ambitious". This is true. All of the women I have dated in the last year seemed to like that I had my own house. What they don’t like is all the responsibilities that come along with it (taking care of the yard, maintenance, general house work). Instead, they would rather me be out with them having fun. I’ve gotten more than one complaint I didn’t show up sooner because I was busy doing something around the house on a Saturday. I’ve had a few think I was nuts and better off renting an apartment. It goes to show how a lot of women are more concerned with having a good time over taking care responsibilities. On OLD, nearly every profile states how they want fun and adventure. I’ve yet to read one that says they want to fall in love and build a life and take care of a home. I’m near NYC so that may skew things as I have more faith in women away from the area. But the truth is most just want fun and as sweet as your story is, wait until you tell a woman you can’t go out that night due to responsibilities.
elaine567 Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 This is true. All of the women I have dated in the last year seemed to like that I had my own house. What they don’t like is all the responsibilities that come along with it (taking care of the yard, maintenance, general house work). Instead, they would rather me be out with them having fun. I’ve gotten more than one complaint I didn’t show up sooner because I was busy doing something around the house on a Saturday. I’ve had a few think I was nuts and better off renting an apartment. It goes to show how a lot of women are more concerned with having a good time over taking care responsibilities. On OLD, nearly every profile states how they want fun and adventure. I’ve yet to read one that says they want to fall in love and build a life and take care of a home. I’m near NYC so that may skew things as I have more faith in women away from the area. But the truth is most just want fun and as sweet as your story is, wait until you tell a woman you can’t go out that night due to responsibilities. But that is mainly about priorities. NO women wants to be second best to taking out the garbage, trimming the shrubs and weed killing, whilst dating. Dating is the time for having fun and having a partner putting the other first. If he cannot do that whilst dating he is hardly going to be a good bet later on... We can go on about "women", but I guess few men would like to be second best to "maintenance" either. "How about we go out to this great restaurant for something to eat and go back to my place later on? " "Oh no, sorry, I need to make a pair of curtains and the lawn needs mowing..."
smackie9 Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 Your situation is tough, but there are woman out there that are as compassionate as you are. That would be the quality/type of woman to look for when dating. She could be a social worker, works a charity, enjoys helping out at the mission, helps the homeless, is a nurse that volunteers to help those who can't afford medical, etc. Just need to find someone that can relate to you. 1
Author Curry30 Posted January 1, 2018 Author Posted January 1, 2018 Lets make it clear I can do things lol, I go away for auditions and film out of town sometimes. So that’s not a problem. I’m just The the main one in my family (with my dad) that takes care of my mother.
carhill Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 Given what you've shared in this thread, I wouldn't give it a second thought. Do what you do, ask ladies you find attractive out on dates and enjoy your social life. Usually actors need to socialize to network to get work so meet tons of people that way. Heck I meet plenty of people in airports and on airplanes and I'm a nobody and that's just one example. Every encounter is an opportunity.
Author Curry30 Posted January 1, 2018 Author Posted January 1, 2018 Haha I’m a nobody as well haha I just work. Most of my money comes from from editing work.
elaine567 Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 Haha I’m a nobody as well haha I just work. Most of my money comes from from editing work. At least you are making money and you are not some leech, living at home, sponging off his parents whose only interest is video games and who thinks a grand adventure is a trip to the local shop. There is living at home with parents and there is living at home with parents and I do not see your situation being a huge turn off for women. Women like men who love and want to look after their mothers in times of need. It is not a bad trait.
Author Curry30 Posted January 1, 2018 Author Posted January 1, 2018 At least you are making money and you are not some leech, living at home, sponging off his parents whose only interest is video games and who thinks a grand adventure is a trip to the local shop. There is living at home with parents and there is living at home with parents and I do not see your situation being a huge turn off for women. Women like men who love and want to look after their mothers in times of need. It is not a bad trait. HEY, my local shop isn’t bad and don’t bash video games now, it’s an escape sometimes.
elaine567 Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 HEY, my local shop isn’t bad and don’t bash video games now, it’s an escape sometimes. Ok I take it all back, you have no chance with any woman...
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 OP, do you drive? Could you maintain a full time job outside the home?
Author Curry30 Posted January 1, 2018 Author Posted January 1, 2018 Ok I take it all back, you have no chance with any woman... I knew it
Author Curry30 Posted January 1, 2018 Author Posted January 1, 2018 OP, do you drive? Could you maintain a full time job outside the home? No my doctor will not let me drive, nor will the DMV. One of the worse episodes I had a fell down a football stadium. That was fun
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 No my doctor will not let me drive, nor will the DMV. One of the worse episodes I had a fell down a football stadium. That was fun I have some good friends, married, a few kids, the man has debilitating seizures. He can no longer work or drive because of his many seizures (all day, every day). The wife (and his disability income) is now solely responsible for keeping the family afloat financially, and they also have a couple special needs kids to boot. This woman is the single most compassionate, loving, upbeat person I've ever met....she has so much on her plate and never complains about a thing. She adores her husband (and he her). But, it's a hard, hard road. His illness was not nearly this severe when they married, so it's not what she "bargained for," but thank God she takes her "in sickness and in health" vows seriously. My point is, I think the long term implications of sharing a life with someone who cannot work or drive are very "huge" to accept, much more so than you still living at home at your age and caring for an ailing parent. Add to that the fact that you could potentially die from your illness....it's a lot more than some people could handle. These are things that I see as being part of your uphill battle, not your current living situation. I don't mean these as criticisms of you personally. You seem like a kind, funny, and intelligent man and many young women would be lucky to have you. I hope you find the perfect, strong woman who can handle the challenges. 1
SevenCity Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 But that is mainly about priorities. NO women wants to be second best to taking out the garbage, trimming the shrubs and weed killing, whilst dating. Dating is the time for having fun and having a partner putting the other first. If he cannot do that whilst dating he is hardly going to be a good bet later on... We can go on about "women", but I guess few men would like to be second best to "maintenance" either. "How about we go out to this great restaurant for something to eat and go back to my place later on? " "Oh no, sorry, I need to make a pair of curtains and the lawn needs mowing..." Thank you for proving my point. The best relationships/women I’ve been with were happy to spend time with me regardless of what I’m doing. They also offered to help and I would help them with their stuff. Same thing with friends - I don’t need to be doing something exciting to see them. Just happy to have their company. Women like that are a rare breed indeed.
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted January 1, 2018 Posted January 1, 2018 Don't mention your epilepsy issues to any potential dates until you are farther into the process. This is my advice. I don't know about this. It could be very frightening to a date if he had a seizure in front of her while on a date if she had no clue that it could potentially happen!
Author Curry30 Posted January 1, 2018 Author Posted January 1, 2018 I have some good friends, married, a few kids, the man has debilitating seizures. He can no longer work or drive because of his many seizures (all day, every day). The wife (and his disability income) is now solely responsible for keeping the family afloat financially, and they also have a couple special needs kids to boot. This woman is the single most compassionate, loving, upbeat person I've ever met....she has so much on her plate and never complains about a thing. She adores her husband (and he her). But, it's a hard, hard road. His illness was not nearly this severe when they married, so it's not what she "bargained for," but thank God she takes her "in sickness and in health" vows seriously. My point is, I think the long term implications of sharing a life with someone who cannot work or drive are very "huge" to accept, much more so than you still living at home at your age and caring for an ailing parent. Add to that the fact that you could potentially die from your illness....it's a lot more than some people could handle. These are things that I see as being part of your uphill battle, not your current living situation. I don't mean these as criticisms of you personally. You seem like a kind, funny, and intelligent man and many young women would be lucky to have you. I hope you find the perfect, strong woman who can handle the challenges. Thank you for this. These are pretty much the main things that concern me when I’m thinking of asking someone out, also with the current state of the Nation you have to be careful how you approach or ask out. 1
Dis Posted January 2, 2018 Posted January 2, 2018 I'm going to echo some of CO's thoughts and this is just my opinion out of many, many women out there... What I need in a partner is someone who I can build a life with, someone who can contribute their time, money, well-being into building a family, taking care of a house, raising children etc etc What you're doing for your mom is very admirable but that means you dont have the freedom to go spend as much time with a SO and in your case it means you dont have you're own place to live. That would be a deal breaker for me. Epilepsy can be well controlled with anti-convulsants so the DX alone wouldnt be an issue but it seems yours may be more a severe case considering you arent medically cleared to drive or work. Those would both be something I wouldnt be on board with. Many women need partners who are independent and contribute to their life goals. It seems your DX inhibits your independence and functionality. You mentioned you're an actor. Is that a lucrative career for you? For some it is. Depends on your luck and where you live. From what I've seen, when guys say they're actors, they don't make much. Considering your DX, have you ever thought of a more realistic career, such as something in dealing with computers, the internet, stocks, where you can work from home? Maybe go back to school online? That way you can make a decent living without having to travel around too much. Again, this is just my take on things. You seem very sweet, compassionate and upbeat I wish you all the very best
Author Curry30 Posted January 2, 2018 Author Posted January 2, 2018 I'm going to echo some of CO's thoughts and this is just my opinion out of many, many women out there... What I need in a partner is someone who I can build a life with, someone who can contribute their time, money, well-being into building a family, taking care of a house, raising children etc etc What you're doing for your mom is very admirable but that means you dont have the freedom to go spend as much time with a SO and in your case it means you dont have you're own place to live. That would be a deal breaker for me. Epilepsy can be well controlled with anti-convulsants so the DX alone wouldnt be an issue but it seems yours may be more a severe case considering you arent medically cleared to drive or work. Those would both be something I wouldnt be on board with. Many women need partners who are independent and contribute to their life goals. It seems your DX inhibits your independence and functionality. You mentioned you're an actor. Is that a lucrative career for you? For some it is. Depends on your luck and where you live. From what I've seen, when guys say they're actors, they don't make much. Considering your DX, have you ever thought of a more realistic career, such as something in dealing with computers, the internet, stocks, where you can work from home? Maybe go back to school online? That way you can make a decent living without having to travel around too much. Again, this is just my take on things. You seem very sweet, compassionate and upbeat I wish you all the very best honestly it depends on what I book at the time. So in your eyes probably not haha. I’ve thought about doing a lot of things, this is option 2. If I picked some other career, at this point, it have to be something in the entertainment industry. But like I’ve said after all this if I don’t find anyone soon it’s not the end of the world
Miss Spider Posted January 2, 2018 Posted January 2, 2018 I'm sorry to hear about your mother. I know they are just cheap words. You sound like a very strong person. Don't stop chasing your dreams! (Just always keep a main plan in case) Best wishes to you and your family and hoping you meet the right girl
Author Curry30 Posted January 2, 2018 Author Posted January 2, 2018 Thank you, words are never cheap. I try to always have a plan I mostly stick with with acting because film keeps me sane. It was sports but I could never play due to health
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