ribbitrabbit Posted December 25, 2017 Posted December 25, 2017 Skip to the end if you don't want to read the history of this situation. Question refers to our text messages. Ok this is a weird situation but hear me out. So there are 2 girls in my life. One long distance and one in my city. I've known both for 10+ years. The crazy thing is I never met the long distant one but I've talked with her way more than the other. Crazy as that sounds, there was a lot of things that turned me off about the one in my city. After dating her on and off for a few years there were just things about her that prevented me from seeing a long term future with her. Short fuze, deviousness, low morals. At the same time, even though I've never met the long distant woman, she seems like the complete opposite. Me and her have this bond and she really seems like a genuine decent person. Due to abuse when she was younger she doesn't trust guys much. In addition she comes from a different culture that seems to stay loyal. I know I know it could all be bs because I never met her but I believe she is who she says. So onto the story. So the girl in my city has been super jealous of the other girl, mainly because I won't commit to her. This eventually got to her for the last time and she bolted. I expected this, and if I was in her shoes I would have probably done the same thing. Because I expected it I was prepared for her to leave. So when it happened I stayed calm and just tried to be her friend. One day she calls telling me she needs some help cleaning her apartment. She just had an injury and could barely walk. So because I care about her I went over there and helped. I soon come to find out she's talking to a whole slew of guys and having sex with some of them. Multiple men were calling while I was over. She is a very beautiful woman hence all the attnetion. She admitted to having booty calls, almost bragging about it. I laughed it off and just played it cool. I left a little later vowing to just stick with the long distant woman. I also said to myself I'm not going to cut off contact with city girl as we have a long history and I don't want her feeling worse by me cutting off contact. Even though she was trying to hurt me... So a few days after that, she texts me and thanks me for a gift I had given her right before I left her apartment last when I heard all her booty calls calling. It was an early xmas gift and like I said I don't hate her...so even though we had broken up I wanted to get her something. Messages went like this: her: thanks for said gift her: it was really useful me: im glad you like it few days later: her: edibles (referring to pot food you buy in colorado) me: what a surprise her: eminem me: love pandora premium Nothing was said after this....As you can see I'm not saying much but not ignoring her either...However I am confused...Is she trying to get me to say something to her....What is up with her random one word texts? Is she playing mind games or just checking if I'm going to cut her out of my life?
Mr.Me Posted December 25, 2017 Posted December 25, 2017 Texts mean nothing is this world to me at least. They are too easy to flake in or out and one doesn't have to put any thoughts or effort into it. It's idle chit chat at best. Reading something into texts will net you nothing in the end. Their just too impersonal.
goingcrazy101 Posted December 26, 2017 Posted December 26, 2017 Fast girls are like fast food they will only give you a heart attach. The girl you message you have never met sounds more like a pen pal to me. Why dont you drop both these time passers and go meet someone in your city and have a real relationship. I think you deserve that. Wasting tons of effort on 2 relationships that are not going to yield anything is just that, wasting. Invest some time into someone who is there and wants to be with you.
spiderowl Posted December 26, 2017 Posted December 26, 2017 Your text response didn't make any sense to me either. Why don't you ask her what she means? If she does not give you a sane and sensible reply, then don't bother with her any more.
Marc878 Posted December 26, 2017 Posted December 26, 2017 Man you are staying in contact with this for what reason?
snowboy91 Posted December 26, 2017 Posted December 26, 2017 Presumably you care about the local girl but there are reasons for you not to date her. Normally I'd say take it as a friendship and ignore any mind games, but if local girl is into you it's all going to be a mess if a friendship is all you want. I'd keep your distance. As for long distance girl, if there isn't a conceivable way you can get together with her then I wouldn't string her along either. As they say, there's plenty of fish...
Akashsingh Posted December 26, 2017 Posted December 26, 2017 Fast girls are like fast food they will only give you a heart attach. The girl you message you have never met sounds more like a pen pal to me. Why dont you drop both these time passers and go meet someone in your city and have a real relationship. I think you deserve that. Wasting tons of effort on 2 relationships that are not going to yield anything is just that, wasting. Invest some time into someone who is there and wants to be with you. I would agree with this advice. The local girl is lonely and when she is lonely she texts you. You find her attractive because she is pretty and pursued by other men. If other men did not pursue her, you would not either. However, I see you are taking half measures. Talk it out, make her happy, commit to her rather than this emotional roller coaster. She is going to play mind games, however; you can have a straight talk. Just ask her if she will be exclusive with you and what would it take to be that way.
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